| Show The Return of The Screaming by E. E D. D When I was still going to Junior High school many many years ago my English teacher always used to have us write about what we had done over the previous previous previous pre pre- summer Whether it was an attempt to forget how boring hers had been or simply a method of making up for her inability to anybody over the previous three months still escapes me Thinking back on it now after all these years reminds me that she never once expelled me and I cant can't for the life of me imagine why Perhaps it was because of the day that I caught her with my Math teacher in the sickroom and I was dutifully taking pictures for the school newspaper The moral is BLACKMAIL CAN BE FUN Well back to my story After a while I became accustomed to writing down that I had done had not done everything or over the previous summer all the dates I didn't have all the girls who went out of their way to avoid me One even caught a plane to New York Well back to my story sounds familiar doesn't it I know that by now youre you're just itching to hear about my summer Well wait no more It just so happens that I took notes last summer just so I could come back and tell you about it LAST SUMMER I Kissed 2 females of the opposite sex and and both went out and became nuns Got caught in th the daily Salt Lake exactly 13 times Played ems Dodge with downtown State Street traffic exactly 24 times Was told to go play ems Dodge exactly times times by my wife You know Im I'm really glad that I married Cindy Cindy Cindy- she still brings out the animal in me Every time she serves me her cooking I either growl like a bear or run like a jackrabbit Well back to last Summer Last July 4 I went to a costume party dressed up as asKing asKing asKing King Kong At last count three gorillas and a chimpanzee had turned in their anthropoid papers and had asked to become giraffes |
