Show kathleen norris says being good Is sometimes being dull bell syndicate service if I 1 when a mother of young daughters makes no effort to help them socially ignores their tensing longings for parties and companions is out of sympathy with their inexperienced efforts to so make their home a pleasant place in to gather their friends she is as she had them for days das without care much to blame us as if in babyhood left by KATHLEEN NORRIS THE HE problem of the decent T girl who at the same time 1 is young pretty and eager for life and companionship is a complicated one girls who want 1 to retain their high ideals of self control to preserve their standards of purity and dignity have a hard time that is some do others have mothers and fathers who remember that once they were young themselves they encourage youthful home entertains entertainments bents from the time the girls are in grammar school they build about them a ring of young friends they cure shyness and awkwardness by all sorts of encouraging and unsuspected devices and their girls go naturally from a gay and hospitable home to gay and hospitable homes of their own but all parents arent like that and it is to the other mothers and fathers that im directing this article rather than to the girl who wrote me the poignant letter that im presently going to quote up to mother when a mother of young daughters makes no effort to help them socially ignores their longings for parties and companions is out of sympathy with their inexperienced efforts to make their home a pleasant place in which to gather their friends and at the same time harshly forbids their going about at night with the fast little crowd that frequents night clubs roadhouses questionable dance halls and coarse variety shows she is as much to blame as if in babyhood she had left them for days without care or in childhood had refused to have them instructed in the three Rs every mother of girls ought to ask herself just what she is doing to prepare them to meet their associates on even terms how free are your girls to say joany to any chance attractive young man they may meet gotherd Mot herd like you to come in to supper on sunday we always have supper and dance or play games how free are the they Y to bring young men to the house with the idea that it if dad likes them and mother likes them then new friendships are in the making Is your y our house a house where hamburger sandwiches and chocolate bars and hot coffee and pencils and tablets and records are part of the sunday night program or do your girls giggle and apologize and fall into silent I 1 embarrassment and vainly search the ice box when the new young man in town bashfully calls hildas family is completely spoiling her life this is part of hildas letter she possibly be your daughter could she hildas problem dear mrs norris she says 1 I am on one e of five daughters we are 27 25 21 17 and 13 years old im the 25 were none of us bad look ing the oldest and the youngest are blondes the rest of us dark my lather father is a chemist he has never gotten over the sorrow of I 1 osing losing my only brother the fifth child who died as a baby of three 12 latter father years ago my despises women he rarely speaks to us listens at the table Is as if he be were under Dres pressure sure and PUN FUN AT HOME kathleen norris feels it is ii lamentable when a young girt girl is denied the use of her own home to entertain friends and have a good time she toys says it is a mothers duty to give her daughter a happy home so that they may later have say gay and hospitable homes of their ok own miss norris suggests tj that parents r help their daughters make tir their air honie home a pleasant place to entertain their friends spends all his evenings in his laboratory with my mother we are six women the house is full of dresses hats powder hair brushes we make beds sweep halls wash dishes plan meals cook together of course we gossip and of course little things are important to us weddings babies illnesses scandals our friends are all women sirls girls come in and sit with mother in the kitchen we have never had a party my father ather not permitting it he always says ays that we ought to find enough amusement among ourselves to tell you the truth the one thing we would dread above all others would be e necessity of having a party we know enow so many girls and hardly any boys abys at all to have 30 girls arrive and 7 men would be too horrible my mother is an angel but she is s too gentle endures too much and is far from well father forbids change my older sister alma and I 1 have been school teachers for five and three years now alma has been offered the of a high school in a town miles away we have a car her salary would be ample for us both and she wants me to go with her my father and mother flatly forbid it at least my father does and mother says you n rust must obey pa alma has accepted for january first but it if we go we go against bitterness and threats and against the tears of three little sisters who say now NOTHING ww will happen if you two are gone V mother says she needs me to give her her alcohol rubs and cook her special food but grace who is strong 17 and much at home could do that what shall we do weve always been nice even though the girls who go a very diff different erent path seem to have all the fun but theres never been any question of any one of us doing anything wild or wrong if alma and I 1 go away be as gentlewomen my father worry about that but shall we go build a new life my answer is go and it would be go if you two were the only girls of the family get away from that stifling atmosphere set up your own little establishment make a few friends make them sla slowly aly and carefully and when you fe feel el ready for it begin with informal little suppers and be ready with pencil games the smartest folk I 1 know never attempt to get through an evening without some casual plan for entertainment keep a pleasant easy conversation going grow confident and natural in manner because everything you attempt is natural and simple after a while when you and alma are happily engaged send for the next girl in line and then th the e one after that and so gradually do tor for yourselves what a selfish cold father and a weak mother hav eritt been able to do for you |