Show Clipper 1 v G r Snow s A Scoop By DEAN STAHLE You think all this late April snow is unusual Some people think it is Others think not WELL IT really is s unusual No it isn't caused by the atomic and hydrogen bombs That's old hat stuff seen only on late late shows Its It's something far more dangerous than that The They storys story's not been told yet but we have the inside facts y THE UNSEASONABLE snow is being caused by the new Chinese satellite Yes that's right the right the satellite The Chinese have always been more cunning than most peoples and here they prove it They take their i time to ponder the situation then come up with an unexpected answer We didn't pay much attention to Comrade pounded his shoe on the table and threatened to bury us But the Chinese listened and took note I. I OUR SECRET information tells us the talk went something like this in a huggermugger meeting in Peking Chairman Mao Our revisionist comrades in Moscow keep they are our leaders But instead of burying the Paper Tiger they just keep falling further behind If we can do something spectacular right now we will take over leadership of the communist communist communist com com- world What can we do AN EAGER young commissar from the hills of China he wants a place in the city had the answer Honorable Comrade the answer is here in your magnificent book Thoughts book Thoughts as are the answers to all problems You tell us capitalists are for a snow job ob So bo we will give them gigantic Chinese snow job WE WILL BURY the United under States snow We will y clog the freeways r eways and parking lots for the supermarkets We will cause many to die of heart attacks from pushing and cussing the snow Best of all we make the entire land every despondent day snow So the Chinese scientists put their he heads ds together on the project Secret name of the work was SNOW Soviets Now Out Witted THE PLAN was simple A high frequency transmitter transmit transmit- ter with a homing antenna seeks clouds bombards them with intense high frequency and zip down the snow faster than a bean sprout slips from froman an ivory chopstick Have you noticed how fast the snow falls and the big flakes This is proof SO FROM NOW on when the Chinese say they are going to bury us we better listen |