Show BOWSER BECALMED astonishes HIS WIFE BY FINDING NOTHING TO KICK ABOUT it her td in alarm she to itani erlna of ahr hopr to III temper ant II 11 calm and copyright 1902 by c B lewla RS BOWSER bad mado up mind that there would be trouble the gas bill had come in the water tax was due the coal nearly out abo butcher bad sent a tough steak and a boy had broken one of the front windows with a snowball in addition the cook bad given notice a water pipe was leak ms SAT DOWN TO HIS lag and some one had stolen the door mat it was with fear and trembling that she heard Ks step but it he had missed the doorman doormat as he entered he bay anything about it lie simply observed that it would be a cold night and led the way down to dinner it took all his muscle to cut the eteaki but he a word to say about its toughness lie help but hear the cook thrashing around in the kitchen in the way that cooka do when they have given notice but be made no criticisms dont you feel well this evening asked sirs bowser after wondering what could have happened to him during the day never better he pleasantly answered im sorry about the steak and I 1 ceball speak to the butcher about it yes its a little tough but nothing heart was palpitating tating as sho bared that nearly all kickers suddenly caaso to kick a day or two before their death and ho determined that mr bowser knust be aroused if he was to bo saved with malice aforethought sho touched upon his sorest subject by asking you found anything new in fire escapes lately V no nothing new ho replied with 0 laugh 1 I guess ive bought all that have been patented and you come across any more hair dyes or tonics not a one 1 I was wondering why yon do gymnastics in the garret any more for the benefit of your rheumatism because I 1 any rheumatism be replied 1 I used to bo pretty billy about those things I 1 sirs bowser bad to get up and down the hall to the front door to get a long breath and recover her compo eure death waa surely on mr bow aers trail ani bo might fall over any minute are you going to buy a horse or cow or chickens she asked as she returned of course not he answered perhaps you are going to get another hog no the matter dear you look pale and perturbed if you aro not well we must send for the doctor 1 I am well but but you arc going to try to aldo the bike again not at all I 1 have come to the conclusion that I 1 am too fat did I 1 tell you that the gas bill bad come in no but I 1 knew it was time for it ifsits It sIts a dollar more this month only a dollar I 1 thought it would be double that well we cant complain about our gas bills there was just one thing more left to her and she was almost gasping for breath as she said 1 I got a letter from mother today you did the dear old ladal and ashes coming to see us next week goedl well civo her the best in the house tell her id like to have her stay at berst six months you you dont mean it certainly I 1 do your mother Is ono of the nicest old ladles in all the world and im only sorry that she cant alvo with us all the time the matter dear mrs bowser choked up and reply she sought the refuge of her room and broke down and wept and the cat came out of biding and sat THE CAT BEGAN TO PEEL astonished to kick over I 1 suppose he did his best Is business at the office good sho continued first rate farst rate aldand An dand nothing happened nothing at all dear mrs Bow nonplused ed but she could not help believing that some calamity was about to descend upon the house she was almost in a tremble as they left the table but mr bowser lighted his cigar and sat down to bis with a peaceful expression on bis face the cat jumped upon his knee and he stroked her back affectionately and ten minutes passed before mrs bowser dared to sayi the boys on the street were having a snowball fight today and one of them broke our window yes I 1 noticed it as I 1 came along iwas the quiet reply on other occasions mr bowser would have jumped a foot high and vowed by the great horn spoon that be would bunt that boy to his tomb and sue his father fourteen times over but he never even turned red in the face the cook wants to leave saturday continued airs bowser feeling pretty cure that ehe would be held to blame or it y e g well I 1 think you can get a better one at least I 1 worry do you remember when you ordered the last coal no but it ought to have been burned up by this time speak to me in the morning and I 1 will order como more mrs bowser turned pale as she looked at him no kick over the steak no kick over the cooka no kick over the broken window no kick over the coalt he was mr boneer cure enough but what had happened since be found fault with the coffee at breakfast wo shall have to have a plumber tomorrow as ono of the pipes Is leaking she finally announced very well he replied 1 I am almost inclined to think the cook hit it with an ax 1 I should hardly eay so water around a ahonso are always bursting and no one can be held to blamo for it there ought to be more police on tola street A big boy came along about 4 and stole our doorman doormat door mat I 1 raised the window and called to him but ho only made up faces at me well it was rather an old mat re phed mr bowser as be looked up with a sallo on his face and the boy probably took it out of a of deviltry I 1 played nil auch games as that when I 1 was a boy even the cat began to abow abe looked up into his taco and then over to mrs bowser and scaring jome bort of a job was being put up on her sho loa to tho floor and crawl or ho B down in front of sir bowser and wondered where on earth the family had got to M QUAD |