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Show JUST FOR FUN Reconsideration. A man was telling about an exciting excit-ing experience in Russia. His sleigh was pursued over the frozen wastes by a pack of at least a dozen famished famish-ed wolvea. He arose and shot tho foremost one, and the others stopped to devour it. But they 6oon caught up with him and ho shot another, whlcii was in turu devoured. This was repeated re-peated until the last famished wolf wae almost upon him with yearning jaws, when "Say, partner,'' broke in one of tho listeners, 'according to your reckoning reckon-ing that last farnl.ih'-d wolf must have had the other "leven inside of him." "Well, come to think it over," said tho story teller, "maybe ho wasn't so darned famished aUter all." Everybody's Every-body's Magazine. More Up to Date. Sho (enthusiastically) I think Palm Beach is Just a perfect Garden of Eden, don't you? Ho Yes. but er a triflo more dress, oon't you think? Exchange. A God-Fearlng Set. ! Tho reverenco for the Sabbath In Scotland sometimes takes a form one would hardly hav? anticipated. i An old Highland man onco explained explain-ed to an English tourist: "They're a God-fearing set o' folks hero. sir. 'deed thoy are, and I'll give ye an instance o'L Last Sabbath, Just as the kirk was bkalln', there was a drover chap frae Dumfries along the road, whi6tlln' and lookin' as happy as If it was ta middle o' ta week. Weel, sir, our lands Is u God-fearing set o' laads, and they Just set upon him and almost killed him." Tit Bits. Not Afraid of Slipping. Michael Dugan.a Journeyman plumber, plumb-er, was sent by his employer to the Hightower mansion to repair a gas leak in tho drawing room, When the butler admitted him he eald to Du-gan: Du-gan: "You arc requested to bo careful of the floors. They have Just been polished." pol-ished." i . "They'a no danger Iv rao sllppln on them," replied Dugan. "I have spikes in me .hoes." Llpplncott's. The Atmosphere of Immunity. "So you are going Into politics?" said the candid friend "I am." replied Mr. Slrlus Barker. "I ehouldn't think a man of your irascible disposition would And such matters congenial." "That's Just tho point Pontics provides pro-vides the only opportunity I know of . saying outrageous things about poo j plo without risking a libel suit." Washington Star. One Touch of Nature. In the hereafter the man encountered encoun-tered a singular group of animals two or three beavers, an otter and some seals, all shivering, though tho climate, to say the least, was mild. "Wo were skinned for your wife's furs," they explained, civilly, seeing his perplexity. ' So was I," quoth he. Thenceforth they wanoercd on together. to-gether. Circle Magazine. A Case in Point. Cynicus It is impossible for a woman to keep a secret. Henpeckke I don't know about that. My wife and I were engaged for several weeks before she sa'd anything to me about it. Philadelphia Record. Our Own Minstrels. "Mislah Walkah. kin yo' tell me do dlff-unce 'tween dat new French play an' an' de elegant mansion yo' bought las' year?" "No. George, that's a hard one. I give it up What is the difference between be-tween that new French play nnd the humble home I bought last year?" "no one am a Chantlc'eer an' de uddah am a shanty wld a mawgage on it." "Ladies nnd gentlemen, the renowned re-nowned basso, Signer Rawkus Rohrer, will now sing his latest popular favorite fa-vorite the pathetic ballad entitled, 'Clarence, I Love You, But You Need a Shave.' " . Looked Suspicious A reputable citizen had left four umbrellas to be repaired. At noon he bad luncheon In a restaurant, and aa he wa6 depart iug he absentmlndedly started to take an umbrella from a hook near his hat. "That's mine, sir," said a woman at the next table. He apologized and went out. When he was going home In a street cur with his four umbrellas, th woman b had teen In the restaurant cot in. She glanced from him to hl6 umbrellas umbrel-las anl said: "I see you had a good day " Everybody's Every-body's Macazine. Bottled Humor. Lam.-on There's a lot of good stuff in Dlgsby. S'lmson You bet there is. I siw him pour in two bottles of it at dinner. St. Louis Post-Dispatch. Where They're Plentiful. Vigorous Street Corner Orator What we want are men of convictions! And where a-e we to find them? A Voice In Jail. Week Pnd. |