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Show xiKni, ..wjm u wi1 a was1 m 'JoiiNsi'OjTs ADYENTUJIE. know thli tlory la true, for Johnston John-ston told It to me himself, and he hfui not Imagination enough to Intent an untruth . He told me that It yon ahould at tempt to enter Into conversation with , a feltow-pisteuger In a Chicago train he probably would present you with ' V the card In question a a delicate hint , that be wanted to be left In peace "'I am going down to Warwickshire tomi o," I aatd" continued John- . aton "to ipend a few days with Sco- ble. and I'll take this card with me If . tone one Insists on talking to me when I'm reading mr piper I'll trjr what handing him the card wilt do.' "I 'link th train at Huston, traveling i second clou ".V- ft'low-paesengcr was a fine- InoklHr woman of about 30 The heat of the Ait and the riclteraent of catch- v, Ing the train had given her a florid color, and 1 could ace that the desire of 4 rondemnlng the weather and exposing the wickedness of a cabman was strong within her. "Presently the woman caught my ere and said, 'I beg your pardon, but will you tell me the exact time? Mr cab- man ' "nut here I handed the woman the Chicago card ! had received the day before. "She read It and then said, 'Oh, Indeed! In-deed! So sorry. Pray excuse me,' and then lapsed In silence, while I resumed my newspaper and congratulated myself my-self on the efficacy of the American plan of dealing with railway bores "It la true that my conscience did give me an occasional twinge, for the distinction between telling a lie and handing n person a ready-made lie printed on a card was not very perceptible. per-ceptible. I asked myself whether In giving the woman a card with the words, 'I am deaf and dumb,' I had not been guilty of lying ns certainly as I ) should havo been If I had told her the . name thing In so many words "At Wlllesden Junction another pas- I aengcr got In. This time, It was n j young lady who was evidently expected by the elder lady. "Ily and by my attention was aroused i In spite of myself by hearing the elder lady mention my name. 'You see,' she said, 'I had to come down today be- tnuti John has asked that tiresome thnston to spend a week with us, and of course It wouldn't do for rae to be away.' "Hut, auntie,' said the other, "how do you know that he Is tiresome It you hate never teen hlmT' "'I know It, for one thing, because John's friends always are tiresome. It dora seem as If he deliberately selected the most stupid men he could find and asked them down to Oreencroft. Just to make Ufa a burden to me And then, my dear, for another thing, I tried to read this detectable Johnston's books Anything more atupld and silly )ou can't possibly Imagine.' "So I was actually traveling In tbe same carriage with Scoble's wife nnd niece, and the former was dreading my arrival at her house and looking upon me as n tiresome nuisance, "The two ladles talked on, but happily hap-pily seemed to forget the existence of the unfortunate. Johnston Once Mrs Scoble came to the window where I was sitting, to point out something to her niece, and the swaying of the carriage nearly threw her on ray lap. "Just then the elder lady began one of those nervous and hurried searches for her purse which women when traveling trav-eling are so prone to make ' "'It Is gone!' she exclaimed, 'and I am aure that fellow In the corner picked my pocket when I was looking on: of his window ' "'Us could not have done that,' replied re-plied the ntev.1. 'for I was looking at him at the time, and he never once took his hands or his eyes away from bis newspaper.' "'My dear child! Do you suppose L ycti are quick enough to watch the motions mo-tions of a professional plckpockei That man has my purse, I am perfectly sure of It. and I shall give him In charge the moment we get to llugby' "It was clear that I must bolt from the carriage the Instant the train reached llugby platform, and before a policeman could be called Tbe train was already slowing and I hastily gath-ed gath-ed up my ru and umbrella and prepared pre-pared to mow .jard the door. " "No, you don't, my man.' said Mrs Scoble. rising and taking possession of the door by the simple process of thrusting half of her ample person through the window. "I saw at once that the game was up "That man has picked my pocket." .id! Mm Rrnhl. na arain na the nollee- man opened the door 'Search him and you'll find my purse In hla possession posses-sion It la marked 'A I) S.,' and has fcur five-pound notes, two sovereigns, and some change In It. besides my ticket' " 'What do you any to this?" the policeman po-liceman asked me, etldenlly Impressed with the certainty of my guilt. " "Simply that It Isn't true I replied I know nuthlng nf the lady's pnrse. and I ran easily convince you that I am a respectable person.' "'My goodness!" exrlalmed my accuser ac-cuser 'Why, the fellow Isn't drat and dumb after attl Constable, he pretended pre-tended to be deaf and dumb. That shows what a scoundrel he 1st "I rose up to follow the policeman, and my foot struck against something that was lying on the floor of the carriage. car-riage. I stooped and picked It up. It waa the missing purse. "'Is that your purse, madamt I asked, as I held It tip 'You must have dropped It when you were looking out of ray window.' ""'I wouldn't advise him to play that game any more,' said the policeman, severely 'Let me tell you sir, that If you travel under false pretenses you needn't be surprised If you find your- "IS THIS Mil, JOHNSTON?" self In trouble You'll have to give me jour name and address, In case anything any-thing more comes of this.' "I me hi in my address as soon as I could get nnay from the carriage, and at the same time I gave him a surreptitious surrep-titious five shilling and asked htm not to give my name to Mrs. Scoble. "I saw Scoble on the platform as the train drew up at (lreencroft, but he did not see me, for I had concealed myself behind the curtains of the carriage. I watched him until his back was turned and then sprang out and bolted Into the cloak room, which was closo at hand I had hoped to remain there until Scoble had left the station, but I was disappointed The porter In attendance, at-tendance, finding that I had no particular partic-ular business with him. Immediately suspected me of designs upon tbe property prop-erty under his charge, and told me that I must not stay In the cloakroom. I tried bribery but the action only confirmed con-firmed bis suspicions and he roughly ordered me to go about my business or he would have ins arrested. Just than Scoble spied rae. "'Why, here you are, after alll' he exclaimed. 'Where on earth have you been?' The niece bad returned, and was standing looking In bewilderment, first at me, nnd then at her uncle Suddenly Sudden-ly she took In the full meaning of the situation, and after saying to me, 'Is this Mr. Johnston?' burst Into uncontrollable uncon-trollable laughter "There never was anything so contagious con-tagious and Irresistible as that laujb. since the world began, and the flash of the girl's mischievous eyes would Dive made John Calvin smile even In the act of burning a heretic I could not help It, but In another moment I found myself my-self Joining In the girl's laughter, whfle Scoble stood and gaxod at us with an almost frlghlrned expression "The niece was the first to speak. 'Uncle,' she said, 'there hat been a mistake mis-take that would have- been perfectly awful If Mr. Johnston had not been a real humorist and seen the funny side of It- Auntie has driven home, for she cemld not -wait uiy longer, ana we will all three walk home together, and you shall know all about It.' "1 hesitated for a second and then rnld to myself that I would meet fifty aunts sooner than say good-by to tht nltce before I had convinced her thai I was not always atupld, and that I conld sometimes be other than a nuisance. nuis-ance. I not only walked home with her and faced the dismayed and repentant re-pentant aunt, but I staid my full week at (lreencroft When I came away I was engaged to be married, and had alrrady began to call Mra Seobls 'aunt,' warily t thow nr lBIt ' bo" no malice and partly by way of em phasltlng the triumph that the man wbom she hsd called stupid hsd woa." -1'all Mall |