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Show JUST FOR FUN ! i . : i Custom House Humor. j Two Germans who were crossing I 1 the Luxemburg frontier declared to j the cu8toni8 officials, "We have ' with us three bottles of red wine each. How much is there to pay?" i "Where is it?" was a6ked. "Well, Inside us." , ' The official gravely looked at his I tariff book and read: "Wine in i casks. 20 shillings Jn bottles. -IS shillings. In donkeys' hides, free. I Gentlemen," he said, lookin up, "you can go!" Der Guttcmplar. . . Unwelcome Advloe. "Kind friend?' whined a heggar, , "I'm trying to get to Glasgow, and I've got the price of a ticket all i but sixpence Will you help me out?" I "No; but I can give you some ex- I f collcnt advice," Teplled the gonIc- , J man he addressed. "Take the train I to within a sixpenny fare of Glas- f gow, and then walk." Tit-Bits. j The Young Grammarian. , Teacher Sammy, in the sen- tence "I have a book," what is the case of the pronoun I? ,r. Sammy (promptly) Nominative jf case. j ! Teacher Next hoy, tell me in ; what case to 'put the noun, "book." - Next Boy (thoughtfully) Book- 1 case. Tit-Bits. ,1 impossible. .j t "Golngmo the game today." j "Sure th',ng! A man couldn't j II got pneumonia In a bettor cause, i H . could ho?" Detroit Free Press. A Trace of Egotism. "My constituents never fall to accord ac-cord me contiuuous applause," remarked re-marked Senator Sorghum, hopefully. hope-fully. "Yes," replied Farmer Corntos-sol. Corntos-sol. "A lot o' folks out our way would rather hear themselves cheer than listen to another man talk." Washington Star. Information. "Do you know an thing about Caesar?" asked Maudle. "Certainly' replied Maymo. "He must have been a very great man, or so many people wouldn't have named their dogs after him." Washington Star. The Lesser Evil. "You talked constantly through the opora," said one young woman. "Yes," replied the other. "I dis-Hkod dis-Hkod to do it. But It was the ouly way to keep father from going to sleep In full view of tho audience." Washington Star. Decidedly, Yes. "Did you over play In 'Hamlet?' Inquired a theatrical manager of a recent acquisition to his company. t "Ever!" exclaimed the newcomor. 'Why, I've played in every hamler of Great Britain!" Tit-Bits. Selfish Girl. Tho Widow Everybody says my daughter got her beauty from me. What do you think about it? Old Bachelor Well, nho certainly certain-ly had a lot of nerve to take all of ft. Chicago News. ' |