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Show Upper Berth, Lower Berth. Wedding Bells " i NYONE who is not inter-t inter-t ested in wooing at this time of year is undoubtedly cither vegetable or mineral, and will therefore probably not derive 'much from what follows." i Such is the leading paragraph in an article entitled "Wooing," written writ-ten by Jack Alan and appearing in the June issue of Cosmopolitan. Mr. Alan goes on to point out that ho is an authority on the subject, as he ; is the only man in the world who ! has wooed and won his wife, Phyllis. As an authority, therefore, he gives some of. the following advice. His method of meeting his future wife was to fall from an upper berth on a ski train into the lower berth of a strange blonde who was to turn out to be Phyllis. This accident served to imprint him indelibly on her mind 'as a "clumsy idiot." He followed that by a series of spectacular spec-tacular moves ending in providing himself with a chance to kiss her by blowing out an electric fuse while in the act of groping under the couch for pieces of a crystal vase which he had knocked over and broken. Quite reasonably. Mr. Alan admits that not every one lias a chance to tumble out of an upper berth as a prelude to meeting a beloved. Other I methods of making an impression include waiting for a pause in the conversation and then making a high, eerie, wailing noise. When this is followed by the appearance of a fascinated cobra through an open window there is bound to be a reaction re-action on the part of the young lady. It is emphatically infra dig when attempting to kiss a young lady to pointedly dust off her lips with a pocket handkerchief as a preliminary. prelimi-nary. It is also unwise to choose a moment for the first kiss that is inauspicious, in-auspicious, such as when she is being kissed by some one else. Mr. Alan feels strongly that the axiom "The girl of today is the mother of tomorrow" should be remembered re-membered as a maxim, not a challenge. |
