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Show Up Vorth If you are skating, and both feet suddenly slip out from under you and point straight in front, It is a sign that you are going to fall down. You should hunt for an easy plaoe to light. It you survive the lighting you should roll over three times and think of your early Sunday school training. If you are walking along of a winter's day and your oars begin to drop off and your feet separated from the sense ot feeling, it is a sign tbat cold weather has set In. You should go home, get a match, return to the same place and build up a fire out of the first dry wood that you can find. If you go to speculating In wheat and finU yourself all of a sudden 3,000,000 bushels long, while the price Is dropping every day, It Is a sign that you have lost your grip. The best thing you can do Is to get between a couple of plow nanales and try to ralso wheat. If you are a farmer and ftnd that Canada thistles, redroot, dock, purslane, black rot, and tho yellows occupy nine-tenths of tho area of your farm, while the remainder is occupied by army worms, weevil, grasshoppers, and mortgages, mort-gages, it is a sign that you aro going to play In bad luck. The best way Is to -jet rid of the farm. The easiest way to do tbat is to die and leave it. Down South If you call a man a liar and ho sticks a cocked revolver ander your nose before you realize thai he has heard your remark it Is a sign that he has got tho drop on you. Tho best way Is to accept bis apology. It you are out fishing and a copperhead, a cottonmouth, or a rattlesnake bites you before any flBh has bitten your bait, it is a sign that you need a lrink. You will find It In the rear pocket of your trousers, opposite the one In which you carry your pistol. Drink all that there Is In the bottlo and kill tho snake. It you lose chickens every night and find feathers lying around the cabin of your colored neighbor every morning, it is a sign that local conditions are not good for chicken raising, so far as you are concerned albeit the colored neighbor may be doing well enough. The beat way Is to give him a change of venut. It you observe that persimmon crop is unusually abundant, it Is a sign that 'possums will be very fat when ripe and the colored population will be In good spirits all the fall. It you discover a moonshine still and go off and tell the revenue officers about It, It is a sign that you ought to ebange locations or else there Is eolng to be a death In your family. If you tickle a mutt's heel with a straw, It Is a sign that you would, had you lived, have shaken a red rag u a sore-headed bull under favorable conditions. con-ditions. , , . If you set man roving around the country, lame In on J leg and with a bandage on his head, talking a good deal about San Juan Hill, and clalrsing to havo bed a rough rider, incidentally wanting something to eat, Is Is a sign I that his wounds have been a long time healing and that ho has dona more rough walklaf tha riding. |