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Show "HAT REMINDS ME- "No, I'm not very well impressed with the house." said the prospective tenant. " "The yard is frightfully small; there's hardly room for a single flower bed." i "Think so?" replied the agent; "but er mightn't you use folding flower beds?" Glasgod Evening Times. Artist (who has recommended model to i a friend) Have you been to sit to Mr. 1 Jones yet? Model Well, I've beeen to see him, but A directly. I got into his studio, "Why," he ; said, "you've got a head like a Botticelli." ( I don't know what a Botticelli is, but I A didn't go. there to be called names, so I ; come away. Punch. , Mother Now, look here, Bob. You know your father has strictly forbidden j you to eat any more cf these dates, and 1 hero I find another stone. Bob Why, mother, sister must have eaten that date; I did not throw that 1 stone there. Mother Are you sure about it. Bob? j Bob Yes, mother, quite sure, because I swallowed mine. Brooklyn Life. . 1 Student You sa professor, that all ' humans have been . evolved from low y forms of animal life. Now, how long do i you suppose my progression has taken? a Professor Oh, that's not a hard ques- V tion to answer. Open your natural his- tory and look up the story of the lobster. " "You William!" exclaimed the old man, "what you doin' on dat white man's fence? Ain't you 'fraid you'll fall off?" ) Then, after a moment's thought, the old man resumed: "But, ef you does fall off. you might ez well fall on de side whar de water- millions is. You hear me, don't you?" ( "What's this thing?" asked a man who was inspecting a music emporium. ) "That? Oh, that's used on violins. Wo call it a chin-rest.", - "Gimme one!" exclaimed the visitor. ) "Su'pose it would work on my wife?" 'v- "Dey's been a powerful lot er airth- ) quakes en fire en brimstone In de worl lately, en hit do look lak de worl' had ( done done en made up its min' ter come ter an end fer sho," said Brother Dickey. ' "Thinks look so onsartin in dat direck- shun, I hez done- made up my min' ter ; quit payln' house rent Jn advance!" Towne Who's that seedy looking fel- low? - X Browne That's Teckneek, the famous v artist. Doesn't look like a much cele- brated personage, does he? I Towne-No; looks more like a person- y agfc who had celebrated mucin n Woman How much for children's pic- i tures? C Photographer Ten- shillings a dozen, Q madam. r Y Woman Why er yes; but I've . got 0 only nine. Tit-Bits. |