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Show WITH THE FUNNY MEN. Ohio State Journal: One pleasant thing about lawn fetes, is that it frequently fre-quently rains early enough to nscessi-' tate their indefinite postponament. Cleveland Leader: Friend What was the title of your poem? Poet "Oh, Give Me Back My Dreams." Friend And what did the editor write to jou? Poet Take 'em. Cleveland Leader: "My la.y son has at last decided on a professio.-i that he thinks he'll like." "Good. What has he chosen?" "He wants to lie a lineman for a wireless telegraph company." Philadelphia Ledger: "All gambling must be stopped within tne jurisdiction of this court," thundered ths judge. "Bet you a fiver it can't be done," said the district attorney. "Put up your money," said the judge, reaching for his roll. Judge: "To be in the swim, I raid $4 admission to hear that new pianist last night." "Well, do you begrudge it?" "Yes. I do. He turned out to be the fellow I complained to the police lir thumping the piano all day a:id all night in the next flat." Cleveland Plain Dealer: The bore stayed later than usual. "I had a queer dream last night," he said. "I dreamed I was sitting by a yawning gulf." The pretty girl suddenly put her hand over her pretty mouth. "It must have been nearly midnight," she said. Then woke up and took the hint and his hat. Washington Star: "I'll be kind o glad when Josh gits home from school," said Farmer Corntossel. "I have an idea he can be right useful." "Are y6u going to put him to work?" "Maybe, I've exhausted all the language I know on that team of mules. But I haven't given up hope. I want to se.j whether Josh can startle 'em some with his college col-lege yell." Philadelphia Record: At a country fair out in Kansas a man went up to the tent where some elk were on exhibition exhibi-tion and stared wistfully up at the sign. ,'Td like to go in there," he said to the keeper, "but it would be mean to go in without my family, and I can't afford to pay for my wife and seventeen seven-teen children." The keeper tlared at him in astonishment. "Are all these your children?" he gasped. "Eveiy one,' 'said the man. "You wait a minute," min-ute," said the keeper. "I'm going to brink the elk out and let them s. e vou all." |