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Show I Strange that some of the funnest stuff in the line of motoring should come from English periodicals, periodi-cals, yet vhe following paragraphs just a few-days few-days over would indicate that to be the case. For instance, this from Printers' Pie, an English periodical, per-iodical, regarding how to talk interestingly on Motor Cars though ignorant on the subject: "When you are asked to come and have a look at the new motor car, much will depend on whether wheth-er the asker is a lady, a male owner or the driver. If it is the driver, your right course is to say that you would have enjoyed it, but that you have not the time. If it is a lady, confine your remarks entirely en-tirely to the body of the car. Speak of the color of the paint, the comfort and elegance of the upholstery, up-holstery, and the ingenuity of the electric light fitting. This is all that she cares about, and you can easily make her happy without showing your . own hand. With the male owner an exactly opposite oppo-site course must be taken. On no account must you say anything whatever about the body. Should he by chance, in a moment of forgetfulness, say anything about it himself, snub him, and tell him . that kind of thing does not matter. Then he will respect you. Ask to see the engines. As they are being exposed to view, say, 'Anything special about your carburetor?' There is always something some-thing special about the carburetor. When he has finished his misstatements on the subject, you observe, ob-serve, 'Sounds ingenious.' Look long and carefully careful-ly at the car's interior, and for some .moments say no other word. Then get up brusquely, and ask him if he would mind staratlng her. If he can start her, say, 'Excellent! Couldn't want anything any-thing better.' If he cannot start her, say, 'I was afraid so,' and leave hurriedly." The Autocar of London says: "The Lake Michigan Automobile club, TJ. S. A., has just pjayed its first game of push ball with motor cars. The sport was excelle'nt for the spectators, tjhough not perhaps for the automoblllsts. Five dars had their bows stove in, two lost wheels, and four had their tonneaus smashed l)y rear-end collisions. col-lisions. There being no more cars available in the town, the game was adjourned. Seven players were hurt, one of them being scalded by the collapse col-lapse of a radiator when two cars going at thirty miles an hour collided. A forty-horsepower car then charged the grandstand, boring a tunnel through it and injuriny twenty-three spectators, but, fortunately, not seriously. The game was called a draw by the umpire, who was at once set upon and badly mauled by the infuriated populace, who wanted a more definite decision. Fifty-eight arrests were made in an ensuing riot. Although the game was postponed, no date was fixed for the resumption of play. It will probably not be resumed till the injured players have recovered' and the damaged cars are replaced by new ones." Makers of automobile bodies in France are complaining that there is too strong a tendency to build cars so as to raise the center of gravity to such an extent as to prove positively dangerous, particularly in the case of high-powered cars when driven at great speed, says Motor Age. It has b,oon pointed out that makers of chassis do not discriminate in the matter of tread between the car that is to have a heavy, cumbersome limousine body and one with a comparatively light open affair, which cannot Ix made top-heavy by packing all sorts of luggage on it. The French body makers mak-ers are undoubtedly warranted In suggesting that the chassis be made to conform not only to the use to which the car is to be put, but the speed to which it is liable to be driven. A heavy limousine, loaded on the top with luggage, and having a tread of only 5G inches, cannot be expected to be so safe Motor Motions as an open car with the same tread and driven at the same speed. The combination of body, load, tread, power and speed should be figured so fine as to eliminate the element of danger, and in few cases has this been done by the average maker. The matter of proportions has not heretofore been given the attention It deserved and is receiving at this stage of the game; there is room for more attention In this matter, too, if the automobile is to meet the many diversified requirements demanded de-manded of it. H & S Pat Moran has been waiting for the holes In the streets to be repaved before having his Pierce semi-limousine arrive. It will be here next week a big 45-horsepower beauty, painted dark green and fitted with all the trimmings possible to get on a car. ij If more people who take short tours in their motor cars knew of the existence of the quaintly beautiful little lanes that Interlace the entire valley val-ley between Big and Little Cottonwood, perhaps the motoring would not be so good in that local- H ity. As it is, there isn't a more delightful spot H near the city for the good of the order. It is just B a few miles below the Walker farms, and the dl H rections for getting there are to keep to the main B road, and when you get far enough, turn, and B then keep going until you find your way out. B Moonlight or early morning preferred. B The roads are really splendid, and the sur- B roundlngs are ideally beautiful. B B That the packing house report sent by Presl- fl dent Roosevelt to congress will have an effoct, B and possibly a decided one, on the automobile B trade and prices of cars for next season may seem B rather far-fetched. Nevertheless it is the truth. H It is the upholstering branch that is affected by the report. Tens of thousands of hides are used I every year in finishing the bodies of motor cars, B and with the better grade of cars these are of the I best quality. In the upholstering of a Thomas fl "Flyer," for instance, three full hides are used in fl making the cushions, and in this one Buffalo auto- H mobile plant alone more than 2,000 hides have been used so far this year. These are in addition to tho enormous quantity of the best curled gray hair. When the result of the government Inspectors' explorations in Packington were made public there was an immediate falling off in the amount of beef eaten. As a quick consequence a less number num-ber of cattle were bought in the market, and this condition made itself felt in the world of hides without undue loss of time. It became known that a scarcity of hides may be felt at the time they will bo most needed by the automobile manu-! manu-! facturers during next fall and winter. 5 & II is to bo hoped that everyone Interested in the furtherance of the latter-day sport of kings will join the leading manufacturers of motor cars in putting a stop to reckless scorching. The I tough chauffeur is the cause of most of the trouble. trou-ble. Purporting to take the car to the garage after his master has finisTTed using it for the night, he loads it up with several clever selections, selec-tions, turns on the juice and they're off. Getting the habit in that manner in the early hours of the morning ho tries it over again to get the cobwebs out of his make-up in the afternoon, and the result is usually a smart funeral. It cannot be stopped too quickly. vJC tj & At this writing the fight for the possession of the Utah Automobile company has not been de- |