Show A gentle hint for two ho irs a fashionable lady kept the draper exhibiting his goods and at the end of that period she sweetly asked are you sure you have shown me everything you havea no madam said the draper I 1 have yet an old account in my ledger gladly show you he did not need to show any more new yorker properly des gnatek I 1 don t understand it f what why he s got some with his throat or his can harily speak that a not so unusual no but he insists that f he has writer s cramp all right too lie dictates his POOR THING housekeeper why is the milk so blue mill man it s de cow mum she s been beelin blue an sad ever since th calf died views of life I 1 m very sorry said the dear girl but our views of life are such that I 1 could never think of accepting them aa my own oh all right replied the young man with an open faced smile practice makes perfect you know and I 1 may be able to satisfy you in time whereupon he focused his camera and proceeded to take another view A hard struggle I 1 called upon miss the other night and stayed until nearly midnight I 1 suppose ou found it hard to tear yourself awaya yes but I 1 did it though however the bulldog kept my coattails D sap pointing Is he much of a boodler 7 well he falls just a little short vt the desired result what do you consider the desired result being enough of a boodler to get caught and convicted usual way my ideas said the self styled humorist have all gone up the flue what are you going to do about if asked the snake editor smoke cm out replied the funny party s he proceeded to load his trusty pipe not so far wrong what a the difference between a ake and an oceana it s a lake when land surrounds the water and an oceana when land surround the water misquoted muggins I 1 understand you slid I 1 was a fool the other day Is the report no I 1 never said you was a fool the otner day I 1 merely said you had been a bool all the days of yom life escaped through a technicality did your mr bichum refer to the subject of love and marriage 7 askea her confidential friend no said the vassar girl it he bad referred to it I 1 should not have et him get away he only alluded tc it H s anxiety Is there danger from fire herec oh no replied the hotel clerk we are well provided with alre es capes I 1 dont care a hang about that how are you fixed tor man escapes 9 experience teaches of course the more children a couple have the larger their doctor s bill becomes not at all the more children they have the less likely the parents are to become alarmed at every little thing had heard them all agent madam could I 1 sell iou this book of fairy mrs no I 1 ve been mar ried four times and faira tales are a chestnut with me new yorker inhuman monster mane he broke her heart the wretch celeste did he jilt hera marle no he insisted on her keep ing her eng gement when had a better offer stray stories sure thing mamma aked small floramay what does M D on a doctor s card meana it means down my dear replied the wise mother merely an inquiry ah reck n yo ain t got no good siz s small hams Is yo 7 asked uncle mose how do you know w e ain t queried the fresh grocery clerk ah say 0 o ain t said the old man ah don axed Is yo nerve of them mrs well of all the impudence mr what is it han nah mrs Newly riche them poor first cousins of yours have gone and got themselves the same identical ances tors that youve got looking out for himself mister william w don t you run fer presidents 7 yoi thirk id make a good onea I 1 dunno bout dat sub I 1 auz only what I 1 d charge by de day ter vote fer sich a high office atlanta constitution fought for peace doctor did that medicine I 1 gave you agree with our stomach patient yes finally but it raised an awful row before it came to terms lady I have wary nothing to give you my poor man but some cold sau sages knight of the road me mum but don t your sign say be ware ot th doga exchange his recording angel who was that stunning blonde you spoke toa that s my recording angel my typewriter town topics more than three feet has your house got a yard at the backa citzman oh more than that how do ou meana citzman it has at least feet one dav and seven the other with due regard to his bill his wife I 1 har that your new patient is very ich physician oh he Is so rich that I 1 gave the mustard plaster I 1 placed on his back a latin name bargain counter habits jones your wife Is ot a happy disposition she acts as though today to day were going to lut tor avei she has no thought as to what the future may have in store tor her mr backseat why should sue tro ible herself about what Is in store fur hera if it s at the bargain count er shell find it fast enough getting at the facts him miss Lide looks like a ft oman who has suffered 1 her yes poor alil she las suf a great deal because of her 1 taken belief ailep him indeed and what Is a her that she could wear a no 3 shoe on a no soot As the word Is used now he at art exhibition and what Is that picture yonder that seems to at tract so much attentions 9 she that Is the portrait of a lady by D auber he it looks to me that he might hav chosen a better subject tor a painting than a cook or washer woman A leao year proposal harry here is the newest drum when Is two an odd and lucky numbers cella you 1 now I 1 never can guess conundrums hairy when two are made one cella oh harry this Is so end den town topics one view of it so you put up the rent yes was the result satisfactory well it there Is more satisfaction in haeng a high priced flat than in having a low priced one pled it was entirely satisfactory what they overlooked diggs there 18 at least one thing to be said in favor of the oldest in habitant biggs what Is that diggs you never hear him getting oft that old chestnut about the gail ding oung bound to catch on a I 1 should like to interested in my improved fly paper capitalist what makes you think it will be success ip inventor because each sheet Is got up to imitate a bald head london answers matter of size if barkeep see here guzzler I 1 wants youse tor remember one t ing guzzler wot a data barkeep when youse ask for a pony an I 1 pass over de bottle youse don t want ter take a dray horse see knew the brand won t you take a chance on thia cake mr asked the pretty girl who was doing the hold up act in a church fair booth not me replied dewed firmly the cake my wife con strutted ted DID HE KISS HER he it I 1 should kiss you would you scream she ot course but I 1 ve got such a cold that I 1 don t think I 1 could very loud his impolite query women claim that the way to get on with a man Is to give him plenty of nicely cooked food well answered mr birlus barker irritably why dont some 0 them try it washington star same old things did you see anything new out west in the way of automobiles 7 asked the first chauffeur no j replied the other the same old chickens pigs and things reason enough have a wee nip friend asked the hospitable passenger with the flask no I 1 thank you replied the stranger i don t drink whisky eh no I 1 make it undoubtedly I 1 believe said the minister that every man has ahli secret sorrow sure the doctor even the man aho la outwardly happy has a sl eleton in his midst |