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Show Next June we all may long for the balmy days of January. Possibly the pet In the cat show would enjoy more keenly life in the alley. Some people can And a typographical typograph-ical error who never find an idea of their own. We have yet to discover an egg that has been improved by the cold storage stor-age treatment. "Gaseous imbecility" has taken its place in the hall of fam3 beside "Innocuous "In-nocuous desuetude." Higher education, too, has its dangers. dan-gers. An Illinois girl started for college, col-lege, but got married on the way. Chicago Is to have grand opera in English next season. If Chief Steward Stew-ard has his way it will also have it in clothing. In the Boston high schools 3,000 girls are taking the commercial course. The boys will have to go west or south. A Denver surgeon was stricken with appendicitis while operating on a patient pa-tient for that disease. Maybe it is catching, after all. That Jersey architect who failed to provide a stairway for a new school-house school-house must have realized that this is the age of aviation. Three and a half jillions was the value of the foreign trade of the United States last year. Pretty big country this, isn't it? Russia affords a big market for American typewriters. To judge from the cartoons we see, Russia is not a big market for American safety razors. There Is a powerful movement in favor of grand opera in English, despite de-spite the fact that such productions tend to discourage the elegant art of conversation. A Boston spinster wants a five-dollar tax on bachelors. But surely she would not have any man value her so cheaply that he would marry her to save a paltry five. Harvard astronomers have discovered discov-ered a new star, but as said star is not one of the football variety, the discovery is not making much of a hit with the students. "Chicago is a burglar's paradise," Bays a jurist who is in a position to know. Aside from that and a few other defects it is a good place to live In if one isn't particular. Europe has now definitely decided that Tolstoi was insane. This may be true, but it seems as though a little lit-tle more of that sort of insanity wouldn't hurt Europe any. If the fashion of wearing tight trousers and padless coats comes into general use we know a great many Bupposedly brawny men who will dwindle woefully in appearance. Many readers of newspapers have wondered at the meaning of those oft-repeated oft-repeated words found at the end of mysterious disappearance stories: "Detectives have been assigned to the case." At any rate the Chicago woman who Baid she rode all night on street cars to cure a headache has invented a good excuse for persons who are prone to stay out until the wee sma' hnlir-H. A New York woman says 6he lost her respect for her husband when she caught him with five aces in his hand. She is perfectly right. A man who allows himself to be caught that way deserves no respect. If that Buffalo man who would not give up a counterfeit bill to an agent of the government were to get the full penalty of $100 and a year's imprisonment im-prisonment he might think he had committed some real crime. We have it from a German economist eco-nomist that American women will soon be forced to labor on farms like men. Here we have an outlet for the surplus energy of those fair damsels dam-sels who seek "careers" in preference to husbands. A post-mortem examination of a Missouri lady who had a mania for heavy diet resulted in the discovery of 1,446 separate articles of hardware In her little Inside. If there 1b any truth in theosophy the lady was either a goat or an ostrich in her previous existence. |