OCR Text |
Show 18 Jan. 28, Hilltop Times . 1 993 Workshop can help parents explain life's facts to youth It's a fact of life. Every child gets a sex education. What kind and from whom are decisions parents can direct. "When I ask parents if they remember where they first learned about sex, about 99 percent say. 'Yes.' Then there's embarrassed laughter. Almost all received information and misinformation from their peers," said Thomas R. Lee, specialist, Department of Family and Human Development, Utah State University. "By the time youngsters are around 10, they've gotten messages about sexuality. They also have questions. Their sources are usually their friends. We think they should hear the answers from their families," he said. According to Lee, parents may have greater success helping adolescents develop values if they consider: El Talking is . the key. Share with your teen what it was like for you to go through the changes of adolescence. O Remember that values cannot be forced on anyone. They are accepted and adopted gradually. Trying to force our opinions on others usually results in rejection. D People tend to model themselves after those they admire and to whom they feel close. If teens feel threatened or belittled by someone, they are unlikely to want to be like that person. D Values are formed best when there are clear standards to compare ideas against. Making expectations clear, while having tolerance for those with differing views, provides a good climate for value formation. D Maintain a close relationship. Minimize criticism. Find opportunities to give encouragement for behavior you like and approve of. D State what you believe. Explain what you think and why. Be calm and matter-of-faabout values, but make your position clear. If you value waiting to have sex until marriage, make sure your child understands that and why you feel as you do. Q Be an example. More than what you say, teens will watch what you do. D Be respectful. It sends a message about how you feel about your teen. Make sure the love behind your concerns gets through. Show respect by being patient. Don't interrupt. We've all had the experience of solving our own problems as we hear ourselves ex- -' plain it to someone else. n Teach decision-making- . Help your child think for him- - or herself. Discuss the whys behind values. Talk about "what if" situations. Help youngsters realize that what happens to them is a result of the choices they make. D Don't give up. Teens need someone to believe in them when they've lost faith in themselves. Realize you can have different opinions and still be close and have a positive influence on each other. ct understand your beliefs and values if you are unwilling to talk about them?," he said. "A while back I spoke to a high school group in Moab. I asked, 'What creates stress for you?' The boys said, Women.' The girls said, 'Boys' and 'Boyfriends.' They laughed, because they laugh at everything at that age. But biology is pushing them. They need some support at home," he continued. "Teaching children that sex is bad in order to discourage sexual activity can create attitudes about sexuality that can cause problems when they become adults," he said. "Timing is important. It's one thing to say 'No' to drugs forever. But we want to say 'Not yet' to sex." '. . Tips for kids Better communication "Communication is the key. It's important for parents to develop skills in talking to their children. How can they Many youngsters have difficulty discussing their problems with their parents. Here are a few tips for better communication: EXCHANGE SERVICE CONCESSIONAIRE I B Body language. Face your parents, look at them and use a tone of voice and facial expression that would make a person want to listen. D Ask to talk. Say, "Could I talk to you about something that's important to me?" Then wait until you have their attention. B Tell your parent(s) what the problem is. Give a reason why. it's a problem. Use an "I" statement, beginning, "1 am feeling" or "I think." Then explain your concern. B Offer a solution. Give an idea of what you think would work better. B Ask for feedback, as in, "What would you think about that?" B End on a positive note. Even if parents didn't agree, thank them for listening. It will set the stage for the next time you want to talk. The Hill AFB Family Support Center will hold a special workshop, "Families Talk About Sexuality, "Feb. 10 from 4 to 5:45 p.m., featuring Lee. For more information call Ext. . 6flS OPTICtit. SHOP em Buy one complete mm r m IJ AT HILL A.F.B. SPONSORSHIP $40.00 r. i, wmm r . j vjmm --i . w i a r mr tyn m mm Designer Frames Special Order Frames m w mi w t i i rr ti mm - j- i mm a i v j r j -- ' TRIP WINNER rm Free Adjustments No Appointments Necessary ' H.A.F.B. BLDG. 430 776-336- 8 HOURS: 9:00 - WITH PROPER MILITARY I.D- .fi.M.-7:0- 0 P.M.-ClO- SD $20 for 2 to New Orleans 20-2Feb. Two round trip coach airline tickets 3 Nights Hotel Stay 2 Tickets to the Mardi Gras BALL Applications received by Feb 1. 1993 Applications received by March 1, 1993 Trip Contort Lenses MON.-SR- T. Member-Maxim- um Mr.l?lttTaM..r.I.HlH mm r- BANKCARD CENTER j $5.00 Ea. Per New VRLU off Designer Sunglasses, Serengeti, CSC, Ray-ba- n mt . FIRST iMn;tei1Mj,Mjj-lHJHjtgOj.UAllli.fJlll:li.tJjjiin- pair get your second pair of frames free. UP TO 20 From January 15th thru February 28th, 1993 3 "DRAWING FOR CAMCORDER All " new applicants except Trip Winner SUNDRV GRAND PRIZE! All A.F.M.C. BASES (Eltttf KlrtUaJ AT B -- NMl SPONSORSHIP: panm fltamfl Bforttoft ((Mtoi mm PAI ADD Lands End G6NGRRA COIUCTION brands on sale for $12-82- 8 Suite 298-000- 3 B . Monday-Frida- y 11-- Saturday 10-- 6 cruise any destination Total trip coordinated-Sat- o Travel If you sign up 25 new members or more, you might win the GRAND PRIZE (contact the UNION BAY Action-Wc- st O'Club for all contest details) at one great store... Name Brand Clothing Outlet 7-d- ay 2 Round trip tickets to Port chosen. Mi Hump Up fftetttlmldp aid Whd (lcrtlies (otnbage 565 W. 2600 So. COMMODORE CRUISES of Commodore Cruises r AH these U.S. AIR 2 Tickets fop a b.u.m. equipmentLimitedGuess GAP SATO Colonial Square Bountiful, Utah . ' S? American Heart ft Association yj |