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Show Sat/Sun/Mon/Tues, March 12-15, 2005 The Park Record A-14 PC Park & Ride MORE DOGS ON M A I N STREET By Tom Clyde • Dolly Parton live at the Glittertind surface, but on a deeper level, something was missing. There was a void. It finally dawned on me that there isn't enough Dolly Parton in my life. If only I could be toxic waste dumps into full-blown suburban sprawl, we sung to by a be-sequined. 60(?)-year-old woman with keep running into more unusual ideas. It was bad the Hindenburg stuffed into her blouse, and a wig so enough when the planning seemed to be pointing large as to defy the laws of engineering, my life would toward more generic condomania and hideous big-box be complete. retail. Not that we don't have plenty of both already. I Visitors could come skiing at 'Hie Canyons to enjoy know I'm nuts, but as far as I'm concerned, there the majestic peaks, then spend the evening at the big shouldn't be a building permit to convert a square inch Dolly Parton show to enjoy the, um, majestic peaks. of undisturbed ground into commercial space as long as Then to complete the trifecla. they could go across the the dead Kmart building is still sitting there empty. street to the boutique hospital and get some majestic But things at Quinn's have really gone around the peaks of their own installed. In a really good week, we might have 10,000 visitors bend. The big push is the hospital. As a community, we have struggled to find a workable solution to providing a night. It's a lot to expeel thai every last one of them 24-hour emergency care. It's a pretty good haul to Salt will want to see Dolly Parton three or four nights in a Lake, especially on a stormy night. So the decision row, but that's about what it would take tofillthe seats seems to have been made to build a boutique hospital in a 300,0000-square-foot facility. So Dolly will have to out at Quinn's Junction. It will be a tiny affair, and the bring some friends along. Larry the Cable Guy is on TV odds of being able to staff and operate an emergency more frequently than "Gilligan's Island" reruns, so I room any better than anybody else has done seem have my doubts anybody would pay to see him. I've lost doubtful, unless we dratrack of where things matically increase our stand between volume of stabbings Siegfried and Roy since • • The odds of being able to staff and and heart attacks. Of the tiger attack. Maybe course the hospital's operate an emergency room any better thanone or the other of additional traffic at the anybody else has done seem doubtful, them could take over already dysfunctional part of the theater for a Quinn's Junction inter- unless we dramatically increase our volumecouple of nights a week. section may be enough ofstabbings and heart attacks." As part of my investigato generate the critical tion of this whole conmass of emergency ^^^^^^^^m^m^m^mmm ^m--m^mm^^m^^m^^^m cept. I keep looking at room traffic. the Branson website. My favorite proposal for Quinn's has to be the din- There appear to be a lot of performers there who are ner theater complex. This is the guy who wants to build getting on in years. I suspect that the altitude may preBranson, Mo.-styled theaters out there for family enter- sent a problem for some ofthem. The quality of the pertainment. The only live performances we have in town formance may suffer if they are hoofing around the are the Egyptian and the Eccles Center. That clearly stage dragging oxygen bottles behind them. isnt enough, even though they are both struggling to We've seen this "Field of Dreams" approach lo keep the lights on and seats filled. So this proposal calls development before, 'if you build it. they will come" is for 300,000-square feet of dinner theater space. I figure kind of the foundation of the whole town. The conthat's between 8,000 and 10.000 seals. That certainly struction of the ski resort itself was a leap of faith. So it shouldn't be difficult to fill night after night in a town of could work. It could also turn into 300.000-square feet 7,000 people. Three hundred thousand square feet is of abandoned buildings retro-fitted into Sam's Club or about a dozen Marsac buildings, eight Albertsons Costco (or the Monkey Bar) with stadium seating. Part stores, or three houses from The Colony. Tliis is not a of the formula in Branson seems to be that hotel rooms modest proposal. are relatively cheap. The whole package hits a price The promoter of the project was on the radio last point that makes for an unusual and affordable stop on week. He said that the theaters would be divided into a cross-country trip, or even a reasonable destination. smaller rooms with different performers in different With the exception of the mud months. Park City rooms, offering a wide choice of wholesome family enter- isn't exactly hitting that price point. There are probably tainment. He went on to explain that one of the theaters, a lot of reasons why we dont see Dolly PaTlon perfor example, could be a Dolly Parton-themed room. I forming live at the Glittertind room at Stein's Lodge, didn't make thai up. That would certainly be a big attrac- but pricing has to be part of it. What's interesting about tion. I bet the demographic overlap between, say. Deer it is that I suspect the Branson-west proposal could sucValley skiers or Canyons snowboarders and Dolly Parlon ceed if it moved to Coalville or someplace else where fans is anywhere in the one or two percent range. the real estate prices aren't insanely high. Outside of Just the other day I had cause to question whether this expensive market there would be an ability to build life was really as full as it could be. It was a three moose the theaters and the necessary hotels, and still hit that morning. On the' drive into town, I saw three moose middle America price point. But doing it in Park City along the river. And a bald eagle. After a wonderful day seems like a stretch. of skiing .-- perfect spring snow, glorious sunshine, and I'm sure this one will just get more interesting. exceptional company, interesting conversation - I Tom Clyde is a former city attorney and author of came home and wenl for a little snowshoe hike with the "More Dogs on Main Street. "He has been a columnist dog. Life seemed as rich and full as it could get on the for The Park Record for 18years. hings just keep getting stranger and stranger T around here. In the city's quest to convert the Quino's Junction area from perfectly good pasture and www.pcparkandride.com 435-940-0140 The BIGBLOWOU1 nowooar b Begins Saturday 12th March! 8am - 9pm Friday, Saturday 8 - 8 Sunday-Thursday ,- Snowboards 40-60% off- Burton, Atomic, Volkl & Elan. WRITERS ON THE RANGE Large selection of demo snowboards for sale Bindings 40% off - Burton, Atomic, Volkl & Elan. A/ Boots 40% off- Burton & Vans. Clothing 40% off - Mission 6, Burton & Monix. Accessories 20% off - Disciple, Level, Burton, Demon, Bakoda, Bolla, Velvet, Anon For similar deals on SKI equipment visit Destination Sports across the street! Large selection 738 Main of skis and boots for sale 645-5336 By Mark Menlove You don't need a motor to experience Yellowstone hile I disagree with Interior Secretary Gale W Norton's agenda for Yellowstone National Park, I have to admire her political smarts. She showed reaching out more than ever to human-powered recreationists. Last season, the park began pulling a grooming sled lo lay down track for cross-country skiers. great form during her recent snowmobile and snow Local businesses offer special promotions to members of organized ski and snowshoe clubs. Human-powered coach tour of the park this winter. Secretary Norton charmed reporters with her grit, access is also part of Yellowstone's winter use plan. But gamely bouncing through sub-zero temperatures on a Norton passed up an opportunity lo support local busithree-hour snowmobile excursion, and her wit, as she nesses and the National Park Service in their efforts to pointed to rising steam from one of the park's many maintain diversity. Instead, she ignored science and geysers and quipped, "It's not all that different from overwhelming public opinion, both of which have conWashington. I mean, look at all the hot air around cluded that snowmobiles are bad for Yellowstone. here." Despite the Bush administration's steadfast endorseBut the best example of her political savvy came in ment of snowmobiles and their well-funded lobby, the the way she stacked the deck in her framing of the face of Yellowstone's winter is changing. More and debate over snowmobiles in the park. In addition to more people are seeking a quiet, harmonious way to her snowmobile tour, Norton took a short ride in a enjoy the splendor of a Yellowstone winter. snow coach, the other Snowmobile use is motorized option for getdown - off 49 percent ting inside the park. • • Though the experience has last season and another Afterwards, she said to an 25 percent so far this Associated Press reporter, changed, skiers and snowshoers still go season - while snow "This is a much more to the park... A lot more of us would visit if'coach use is up 28 perordinary kind of expericent this season. Several ence. " Then, with an we could enjoy Yellowstone free of the long-time snowmobile unenlhusiastic shrug, she noise and pollution Gale Norton and her concessionaires have added, "It's not as special seen the light and supporters so wholeheartedly promote." invested heavily in snow as a snowmobile." I am less disturbed by ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ™ • ^ " ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ™ coaches. And yes, given' the choice between the the secretary's unabashed plug for snowmobiles than I am by the fact that in pit- two, skiers and snowshoers would much rather share ting the struggle as snowmobile vs. snow coach. Norton trails with the cleaner and quieter snow coaches than deftly changed the terms of the debate to exclude with lines of snowmobiles. Snow coaches create less Yellowstone's other major winter constituencies: environmental impact, produce less noise and exhaust skiers, snowshoers and other quiet recreationists. and put less stress on wildlife. That is why Gale Norton Norton would have us believe the only way to experi-, and the Bush administration are on the wrong side of ence Yellowstone in winter is with a motor, and that this argument. our only choice is which kind. - Bui that's not my point. Any discussion of how best Long before snowmobiles and snow coaches vied for to experience Yellowstone in winter should include not Yellowstone's tourist dollars, cross-country skiers and only what's best for the park but also the range of snowshoers were going to the park to enjoy the natur- what's available lo visitors. A motor is not required lo al beauty, wintering wildlife and solitude of winter in Yellowstone or, for that matter, the millions of acres of public land across the American Snow Belt. Yellowstone's quiet season. Touring on skis or snowshocs allows one to see, hear, Though the experience has changed, skiers and snowshoers still go to the park. We stay in local motels, smell, taste and touch the wildness and magic of winter. eat at local restaurants and happily spend our money It's healthy. It's healing. I hope next time Gale Norton supporting Yellowstone's gateway communities. A lot visits Yellowstone for a winter photo op, she'll strap on more of us would visit if we could enjoy Yellowstone a pair of skis or snowshoes and experience the park on free of the noise and pollution Gale Norton and her its own terms, under her own power. supporters so wholeheartedly promote. Events such as Mark Menlove is a contributor to Writers on the the annual Rendezvous Ski Race, which last season Range, a service <?/High Country News (hcti.org). He attracted 826 competitors and hundreds of spectators* lives in Park City, Utah, Where he is an avid backcottnto West Yellowstone, contribute significantly to the try skier and the executive director of Winter Wildlands local economy. Alliance, a national organization working to promote The park administration and local businesses are andpreserve winter wildlands. tifoughout 2005, The Record? will celebrate and reflect on the last 125 diJs (while looking forward to the next) and we'd like your help. Those have anecdotes to share about working at or reading The Record are encouraged to send them to 125amiiversary@parkrecord.com. |