Show 15 1922 ING JANUARY I II I Were f fh h J Jt I t H Ht t tI 01 I j f lit Daily Tours i By Frank A. A Hunt Ii VERSE AND VERSE I Mary Iary had a snow white lamb Which gave her cause to w wee vee r It spent a day in in Salt Lake tow And came back a black shee sheep Thurs Thursday ay night the Salt Sal Lake Lake lice arrested a manicurist and char charge her with violating the tho liquor law hand to mouth liv living as it t were I A CRY FOR FREEDOM Theres There's not true freedom in the Ian lam lamOne One thing should surely be bo allowed allowe The right of ot any guy to 1 kill I The peanut eater in a crowd I II Luke Luke I t Well WeIl If it upon this hapless guy Death penalty you w would uld bestow What's left lett for one who loudly rea real The Tho The titles in a picture show I Newark Advocate I And while were we're che checking off the ii ul Of Ot those whose deeds are arc very blac Lets Let's double up a deadly fist For editors who send em back bach Colu Columbus bus Dispatch Id I'd like lUte to line Une against the wall The solemn and distressing grou The men who fill the eating hal With gurgles when they eat cat the soup Oakland Now heres here's the gent whose neck twist M t The biggest scoundrel of them 8 all j The shoe clerk with the oily Who Vho sells y yOu U on a pair too smal MANDYS MANDY'S CAPACITY j Pete went vent to a dance t meet the girl ot of his choice ii t tI he arrived late for the da danci I But soon he saw Mandy He went Jo o her and asked rather ratler nervously l' l Mandy are yoh program full Mandy looked at him in Lawdy Pete she said I cn as yoh dat it takes moh dan tw sandwiches an a cup of f tea to fill ma mal program Chicago Herald and Ex Exa iner EXI ANCIENT HISTORY He- He was was the he only on one of all the tile we ding guests who did not appear I inH happy frame of mind He only adorn adorne the wall and looked lugubrious Mi Wh What's ts t's the matter cried out outI e exuberant youn jou ig man yo O I kissed the bride yet Vet Not Kot late lately latey y he said with a gulp gulpS Bankers' Bankers Journal I e af The latest thing in lir Trench fash or oI is a gown down to the rl rigI hip if they start anything towa lowering it on the left lett hip we pr pose to scream Los Los Angeles Times Time The Boston man who refused a a. 1 legacy and now has accept it Jt can find consolation in Jt t th thought that a lot of people would ha hay done the same thing thing that that is the a San San F Francisco o Chronicle ia Someone has figured out that 85 jpe cent of all elopements end disastrous But tho the only reason th the percentage so high is that elopements so ott ofte l lI end in matrimony matrimony Life Life e. e I SUITABLE EPITAPHS I Here lies Leander 1 m I Who ho thrived on chattel snaps He H. shuffled off oft tb this heartless beatI goo And he lIe has gone above ove I FOR MEN ONLY Speedo Speedo What What do you jou consider best years of ot a womans woman's s lire lire- Peppo PepPo-Oh PepPo Oh I should say the first fi ft I years ears she's IS Topics Topics of the Da D Films NOT HINTING AT ANYTHING What hat shall we do do she as e bored to the verge erge of tears Whatever you jou OU wish he replied g ga If Jf you rou ou do Ill I'll scream she s sa coyly And thus a pleasant evening e pas pass passI quickly FOREWARNED I Teacher Teacher Johnny Johnnj can you tell t what they raise in Mexico ll Johnny Johnny-I I Know what you want I to say maam ma'am but maw told me men n nto to talk lough American Legi Weekly i M MAS AS A RULE H Clerk at an employment bureau burea Someone has sent for a yardman st Manager We Manager We Ve haven't ha any at present Clerk Then Clerk Then shall I send up th thra footmen men sir Syracuse sir Syracuse UN N. N 1 Y He Hei aid A LIFE AND DEATH A minister who guarded his m mo mor Hie r ring ing ling study hour very ery carefully told new maid that in no I were callers to be admitted except course he added in case of ot life I death Half Halt an hour later the maid kno ke keat at the door A gentleman to see you jou ou sir Why hy I 1 thought I told jou you you- Yes I told him she replied he lie says its it's a question Of f life lite a adeath I death So he went downstairs downstairs and and fou foun o I ian an insurance agent Seattle SeattIe Seattle Postal Post 1 I LAZY LOVER Gladys I loves yo yo I 11 if il jo yo 0 I I- I J JWell Well uh good uh-good good man In Inc e erupted Miss Gladys Doe Does n yo vo aim to do no work tall a-tall Kans Kansas s City Mo I. I Star JB this plan the wife might receive a salary for housework besides moneys aside for her to pay certain of the What hat she can save out of her salary ail expenses she puts away or spends to to sal herself and the husband docs does with hi his share of oC the budget HI HIBy I By some orne such scheme the home oft business woman is apt to be run art aft marriage But in many states it is oril on I M Ii courtesy arrangement by bj which H t husband does not demand his legal And in event of a disagreement or vorce the wife finds that she has ve e little that her husband cannot control I t i It ItIn in some states even dispose of oC o i t feminine lawyers contend that the mod mode wife's wife s scientific menage is built on shi t ing sand It is s interesting e to note that in instates instates st states e where surveys e h have been ma madej deJ statute that a woman must tn ta the name of ot her husband Los husband Los Ang 1 Times Ani i Sc 5 |