Show Who Shaves One Eyebrow Wears A 9 UIa n Pi jl Driven 1 by War t ss La 0 tit E N i A J lp i ON W ITER S TALK V O fl t 4 r t tz 4 n You FoR Gor r r T nE M L z R the q vJ h 1 t tI I I Ise se r elb t tra C R 2 r a BROW I ca nc s IER 1 f GU J J ae t tI Tip I 5 t of r hr I II II I I I I I I Q I Ia ae e d a ed b Nixola Smith Greeley-Smith e f great geat man-eating man riddle of stone st at steel teel anti concrete looming out he morning mist with screaming horn s Ii is s of brass brass brass-a a colossus a huge I Il t Ching breeding al animal mal of a c city l h the bay on massive legs j t tal j thrown beak k shoulders flung 1 dal proud defiant and wicked Why e you you recognize the picture On I. I one chance that you do not I will M li 1 ain that it portrays our own dear fold old New York as she appears to to I t turned tr mod Abdullah a contributor to toi I i Oaf set et I i Oaf set et Smart ISmart i es New York that subscribed of the Liberty Libert- loan t h York that has undertaken to I. I half of the wanted k the tl t e Red Cross a city according Abdullah horrible nt nt inefficient graft ridden but butt butta ta h human uman and being human grop- grop tit t somehow toward an ideal for Miss New York her latest fg considers her hr from every angle i r angle advisedly having in mind physical ideal for which she yes ves he comes here from San Sau Francisco New New ew Orleans to earn tier her living i lS Innocent slip of a girl not a day A r than 30 Mr Abdullah finds f when she leaves us to go back rest with sith the hero who has rescued Cad her her stocking legs are horribly with She spent a fortune at Mme Cel Cees Cees Ce- Ce l es es the specialist I. I ire jre she learned the oddly n EQ trick of shaving her left eyebrow j fw wearing aring a purple w wig swig g with one ly crimson curl resting on her herit it rf forehead like a n flame un ve va never seen anything like her Last winter inter to be he sure Ji t fie sf New ew York had both eyebrows Med led led after she had had her sham- sham I l r P AIR FRESH HAT AND i RESH olio S Solio one I I I poo Poe and treatment wave and mani mani- cure But we are arc not doing that now I And the colored wig craze happened years ear back and never got off the stage anyhow I S Still tn Achmed Abdullah must have o I seen her somewhere for he appeals s to have done New York pretty thoroughly thoroughly thor thor- I has invaded lizard lounges land and cabarets and the throbbing precincts precincts pre pre- of Washington square square never never I I Washington square he calls it it Reading that name Achmed AbdulI Abdullah Abdul Abdul- AbdulI I J I lah you Ou think of course that it cannot cannot can can- not belong to a real person But can I it really is over a doorbell at Waverly Waverly Wa- Wa verly place a bell which I rang and I rang Saturday afternoon in the tho hope I that the discoverer of the New York I girl who shaves one eyebrow only would tell me where she might be I I found But no answer came and I I concluded that Achmed Abdullah AbdullahI I must have fled from the wickedness 11 of the weather of the torrid city he heI I has described Here by me way is what h lie he lias 19 to say ay of his Ills own neigh- neigh i 1 i Washington Square I ington Square The Village and Village and by I calling it THE Village with an inI infinitesimal in- in l appoggiatura on the THE I I you prove at onto that you have a ai i J nodding acquaintance with the Alba Alba- j nian lad who stands on guard in the Cafe Brevoort so that Bohemia doesn't make malte away with the towels and the soap and the exposed plumbing and with the newspaper vendor on the corner corner corner cor cor- ner of Sixth avenue and Washington place who who guess guess the reason reason keeps keeps five pounds of brick on top of his paper pile Mr l Abdullah maybe its it's Mr Achmed whichever it is if he had answered that doorbell I should not leave you and myself in this horrid doubt has discovered native New Yorkers Knickerbocker aristocrats who drop their final gs Would that he would lead me ine to them Alas Ive I've met only those who say bold boid and and read all the from Fifth to A. A But Dut place to our critic Typical New ew Yorkers he excl exclaims Fellows who at t the tender age of 4 showed by the way in which they dropped their gs g's s that there was J I Knickerbocker blood lood in their family Fellows whose conscience had been hard boiled by chronic impecunious- impecunious ness Heartless indifferent fellows who when mother gets mixed up with the hind wheels of a motor car drawl what doing and who I say what say are you when the waiter walter empties a coffee pot over their shirt fronts remonstrate j mildly with Hang JIang it youve you've 11 I the cream instead of Immediately ar arranging arranging arranging ar- ar ranging for an old fashioned lynching lynching lynching lynch lynch- lynch lynch- ing bee as they would do were they blessed with the chivalry of the South or the big bulking manliness of the West Fellows who take no interest In Chautauqua and Max Eastman and Shakespeare pageants and communal playhouses and who instead of discussing discussing dis dis- cussing with their the hom home policy of the ancient Peruvians the transcendental Puritanism of Nietzsche and the influence of the dry law on the manors and manners of or Virginia ask them to come over to my diggings and have a look at my new autumnal socks Fellows who wear spats SP To my mv mind quite attractive fellows let fet lows Fellows at any rate who dont don't I take talce themselves too seriously fellows who never utter dull dun platitudes with j the solemnity of Moses reading the i tablets of the law to the Israelites I fellows who dont don't want to uplift or to tobe tobe tobe be uplifted regular fellows fellows In In shor short shori New Yorkers Yorkers' More lore power to them then I and may every drummer who goes forth with our old stories and our new goods carry their gospel of toleration toleration toleration tion over the corn belt helt into darkest i America They need it there |