Show I 1 IVl tr r r Marriage arriage J Jt t wise Of ne Wise to Ignore Relatives in fc n Solving Salving Marital Problems I J i r j uel G. G and Esther B B. B Kling r i tl hould should you always follow Relatives Relatives' r relatives relatives' advice on your problems I t o. o Since relatives are gen gen- I r and not always I I 9 a situation clearly lt j-lt t ht lt to do what you OU think is J. J d if necessary to get het help helpa P ha Ja a professional objective t Glider eider for example the case I 1 L. L whose relatives es were li ing that she leave her husa hus hus- a r Mrs rs L L. a rather attractive in her early had a few IB hI ago marI married ed a business Hive whom she had known bout O t two years From every view the couple had 1 well matched TO On the Hone Honeymoon moon lc the Ithe honeymoon Mrs L L. Ifor the first time that her herd herI I d was wa impotent When she shei Ded wd i her brother the latter I Y J r. r was outraged and insisted that j Mrs rs L L. leave lea her husband imme- imme This Mrs L. L refused to j do She told us that despite his incapacity she loved lo her huband that he was completely devoted to I her and that she wasn't missing the phy physical ical side of marriage as much as she thought she would or should Her family on the other hand insisted that her marriage be he I terminated on the ground that it wasn't any marriage at all We Ve advised Mrs L L. to disregard I her family's wishes and follow her own judgment Of course Mr L. L I if he was aware of his condition should ha have vc revealed re it before the I ceremony The fact that he didn't indicated either that he himself was ignorant of the true state of affairs or thane honestly believed believer the condition would be corrected with his marriage as sometimes I happens Even now we suggested it might still be possible to effect a cure Ph Physical Examination Certainly the first step was a thorough physical examination to determine whether there was any organic basis for Mr Ls L.'s difficulty I culty If there wasn't treatment by a competent psychiatrist might get at the root of the difficulty I Q But what if nothing could bedone bedone be bedone done A. A If Mrs L. L felt she could be happy with things as they were if she believed she was getting compensations out of the marriage which made up for the lack of sex she he would be justified in staying married Of or course t if tf the lack of intimacy affected her health that be another matter But apparently apparently apparently ap ap- ap- ap Mrs L. L was aas suffering suffering- more from tension created by her relatives than from any feeling of deprivation In any event since she cared a i great deal for her husband and he was devoted to her her best course was to continue the marriage Meanwhile we suggested as she firmly tell her relatives not to interfere And If they continued to worry or or r embarrass embarras her it might be bo advisable isable to avoid them altogether I I |