Show BITS OF COLOR POOR CHARLIE IIOYT Time curtain rises on lA Temperance Town Tine lqwn Is I full of wino and wit and laughter 1 The cllniiix comes the canvas sheet rolls down tableau af I Then rises on a grieffilled ter II I I You laughed and all the world laughed to t od friend I The curtain dropped before the word I was UDoken I Tho tableau came and to the hitter end I Well grieve for yon old man for one I heartbroken I A living death before lifes dream was oer For you the sadtoned Midnight Bell IH sounding A psalm of grlof for ono who Is no morA mor-A song of love throughout a land resounding re-sounding S S S Russell Sago will go abroad next month to Russel some time at time Paris cxpoMl tlon Incidentally It may b remarked that time Is all Uncle Russ will spend but hell come right home If I somebody reminds re-minds him that time la money S a S MIDNIGHT REPARTEE Pa rolled ur from tho club He was using most UI tho sidewalk nnd when ho got homo he tried to pull the gate out when ho should have pushed It In A figure In white appeared at tho front door doorIt seems tinny to me that a man doesnt know his own gait came from the doorway Yeah Ill admit my dear that the pace was a little ton rapid thlsli evening imirmiirod the old man Other things followed O O J WHAT DO YOU KNOW Thcro nrc bores that Ire Innumerable who stop you on tIne street There tire hundreds hero are thousands that you arc forced to meet They come In all varieties biG small white black or tan But not one of them can equal that wis domladen man Who says Well what do you know You may KO from Walla Walla to Machlas port In Amine To every city on the map and wander back again Youll see long men short men slim and Youl l mon built on every plan And 3oiiil always find that lobster of a wlsdomJudcn man Who says Well what do you know They quarantine diseases and they Jail for small offense A squad of hobo citizens and think tho joko Immense Now why doesnt Congress rise somo day and try to put I ban On that busy guy that awful bore that wisdomladen man Who says Well 4 what S do you know l WHATS BRED IN THE BONE Tho most tantalizing thing on earth Is to see tho little pink ribbon that aluays sticks out of the top of an evening gown and not having nervo enough to pull It When a homely woman wears a heavy veil tine 0 men rubber harder than they do At a ragIng beauty At one time In life every Girl wants to bo known as the village cutup Most girls who co away to college and expect to bo called mlsa by their old friends when they pet buck forgot how they used to hang by their knees on I trapeze when they wero all kids together to-gether and played circus Lots of girls would drink cocktails instead in-stead ot soda wa tel 1C I they could got them o n glass that was not transparent transpar-ent TOD GOODWIN |