Show TALES OF TMEl DAY A XCTT American Imlnstrj Want to hire me said the man with the heavy mustache and the straw hat as he abrupt entered the office of the campaign cam-paign manage What I rIm r-Im an enthusiasm incubator I can get up more cheers and encouraging interjections in-terjections at a rally than anybody else you could find by hunting a yean Oh I see youre just a plan rooter No I aint any rooter Im an artist Times are hard but the opportunitys always ways there for a man thats at the head of his profession Im a ventriloquist out of a job And when a mass meeting hear me shouting at all four corners of the hal and making thing lively with my hands and feet in the midst of the audience theyre bund to join in And there ant anybody except a mind reader that ud ever have the faintest suspicion of its bein a fake Washington starTle Star-Tle Apple Seetl Cliarm A Girls said the hostess of the occasion occa-sion I was down In the country the L other day and I had a basket of lovely b t I J apple given to me I thought we might have some fun eating them and Ive ordered or-dered them sent in I Order my tombstone sad the Vassar frlrl who was out on vacation green geen apples are my kismet Apples are pronounced very beneficial to the complexion said the Boston girl adjusting her glasses We l excuse me from anything green remarkedthe girl from the west geen You are all geese said the hostess with more truth than poetry I used the phrase eating them merely as a figure i of speech Nobody eats apples nowadays i really but theres jots of fun in counting the seeds and naming the I The app es were brought in and passed I around Each of the girls took one but as there were no plates nor knives they waie until their hostess took the initial biteHere Here you are she chirped now the girl who cannot break her apple square In two old maid pairs with her own fingers will die a Ohohoh chorused the girls I looks as easy as rolling off a log sad the Vassar girl but she changed her mind when she found her apple broken Into fragments No wedding ring for you missy laughed the hostess and she held UP two halve of her own apple which were separated sep-arated a neatly a with a knife My apple Is completely disintegrated said the Boston girl staring mildly at the remains cf her fri Now girls count the seeds in your ap grls ple core while I say the rhyme One I love Two I love Three I love I say Four I love with all my heart Five I cast away Six he love Seven she love Eight they both love Nine he comes Ten he tarries Eleven he courts Twelve he marries Thirteen wishes Fourteen kisses Look at the mice sad the girl from the west She had mae them out of apple ap-ple seeds while the hostess was reading off her charm Eve girl shrieked and jumped on a chair and then the meeting adjourned sine die Detroit Free Press |