Show HUMOR OF THE HOUR The Worm Turns Conductor Did I get your fare Passenger guess you did I didnt see you ring it upPuck YeastDId the colonel draw his sword in defense of his country CrimsonbeakNo only a pension Yonkers Statesman MotherAnd are you sure that he loves you DaughterOf course I am Cant I see how he stares at me whenever I am not looking at him Fliegende Blatter Walter to guest whO is absorbed in the menu What do you wish to eat please Absentminded Professor havent time to talk now Ask me after dinner TitBits Depends on the emergency First citizen citi-zen Jones is a howling Jingo I wonder if hed go to the front in > an emergency Second CitizenHe would if the emergency emer-gency consisted of an attack on the rear Puck Inquiring tourist in an Oklahoma rest res-t That is a novel idea of yours surely calling your guest to dinner by firing oft one barrel of your shotgun But pardon me why do you discharge only one barrel Proprietor Early Bird Restaurant keep the other barl to collect payment for the dinner with Harpers Bazar A Sore SpotAlkali IkeHe accused me of havin been tarred an feathered an run out of town down in Texas about four years ago Judge Stringer Well that did not warrant war-rant you in trying to shoot him Alkali Ike Huh I reckon if you had been tarred an feathered an run out of town yourself youd be jest as touchy about it as I amPuck Mr Huggins and Miss Dimple had been discussing marriage in an impersonal manner when the young lady announced her preference in this way The man I marry must be handsome talented nmi able courageous and without a fault of any sort whatever This Js very sudden replied Mr Huggins I thoroughly appreciate the honor you confer upon me but you will give me a week to consider I suppose Harper s Bazar |