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Show The Daily Herald Sunday, December 3, 1995 Family time can be at dinner table There was "startling" news about a recent sociological study on TV one night last week. As usual, it told us something most of us or at least already knew could have figured but for ourselves with no training whatsoever. The upshot of the study was that children whose families ate dinner together regularly performed better socially and academically than children who did not share regular meals with their families. My parents and grandparents knew that and I'll bet most of yours did, too. When I was growing up, everyone had to be at the con Steady Editor's note: Under a assault by lawyers and lobbyists for people fed up with public schools, laws have been rewritten in recent years to legalize home education in all 50 states. It may be legal, but it's not easy in some states where school districts are fighting home schooling all the vrv. By TOM WELLS Associated Press Writer 3Jk ...... ( .Jlr V.--. v- -' t y MIAMI George Washington was schooled at home, but not because of drugs in school. Thomas Edison and Booker T. Washington also were taught at home, but not because praying in school was prohibited. And Florence Nightingale and Agatha Christie got their education at home, but not because schools were handing out condoms. Now home schooling, once the backbone of education in this country, is making a comeback among Americans who fear for their children every day they pack them off to public schools, with their metal detectors, Ray vv.?.. v security squads, surveillance cameras in the halls and barbed wire atop chain-lin- k' fences. "I don't want my kids getting o assaulted at school," Lamar said one morning at her home in Miami. She cradled her 2 baby in her left arm, used her right hand to scramble eggs and got the day's home schooling started for her other four children algebra I for Justin, 14; ancient Egypt for Bethany, 13; spelling for Cherie, 9, and cursive writing for Renee, 7. Her children are among an estimated 1.5 million students going to school at home in the United States. And more parents are joining the movement every year, says the Home School Legal Defense Association, based in Purceville, Notar-giacom- The Sun Sentinel table within a minute or two of when dinner was ready. And no excuse save death or serious injury was good enough to be late or missing if you didn't call ahead of time or make arrangements in advance. Dinner was sacred in my house. That's when we talked about what was going on in school or on my father's job. We swapped family gossip and learned family lore. Often, we dis- cussed religion, politics, world affairs or philosophy. We didn't always agree, but everyone always knew where everyone stood. ; We learned a lot about courtesy and respect, too, lessons that carried over into the rest of our lives. No one started eating until everyone was seated. Mom and Dad Va. The association says its members have 150,000 children taught at home and its studies show that about 1.5 million other children are home schoolers. Home schooling has come a long way since the early 1800s when a widow would teach a dozen or so children in her home. i rrer hit fii ihiit-m-iii- ..... Adrian Lores plays the violin at Oak Grove Community Church in Miami as orchestra Now it is a movement, with a national organization, lobbyists, lawyers, state associations and gvass-roo- ts groups that take their fight to the courts and school boards. The home schoolers, as the movement calls itself, don't mince words when it comes to their dissatisfaction with the public schools. "We're ending up with a moral anarchy," says Scott Somerville, an attorney with the Home School Legal Defense Association "They say, 'Don't do sex, but we know you will, so use a condom.' So what's the next step? 'Don't do drugs, but we know you will, so director Patty Ketzle watches on. Lores is a "home schooler" but works with private tutors here's a needle?'" Home schooling often comes under attack as being academically deficient, but children taught at home score a much higher average than public school pupils on standard achievement tests each year, Somerville says. On the Iowa Tests of Basic Skills, for instance, home schoolers averaged at least in the top 27 readpercent in the areas tested ing, language, math and basic battery. Somerville said. Even if children could get a bet. ter education at home, families in many states were breaking the law a few years ago by teaching their own children. Many parents have was a guest present, the guest went first. No one ate the last pork chop or serving of potatoes unless everyone else had passed on it first. And none of the kids left the table without asking to be excused. Out of this came respect for elders and for the ideas of others. What's more, we learned how to debate and how to think. If you made a statement, you had better be prepared to back it up with facts and logic. Even then, we could never win an argument with my father. When cornered, he would say, "Don't tell ME!" And that would be that. Still, when Dad said, "Don't tell ME!" it was as as good saying, "Uncle, because we all knew he had lost. Unlike many others of our generation, my wife and I continued this tradition, although with variations. We're not quite as rigid, for example. . And I'm not right nearly as often as my father was. . When the kids were younger, we sometimes played games. On Amnesty Night, everyone could admit something he or she had done wrong, without fear or reprisal. Then we would dis- cuss it. On Swap Night, we each would pretend to be another member of the family. In that way, we all were able to get a glimpse of how we appeared to the others. With the children mostly grown, it's more difficult to maintain that tradition. Still, we manage to eat dinner together most nights, even if the meal consists of pizza, wings or Chinese food that has been delivered. For me, it always has been the best time of day. Is it the secret to raising . ; healthy, happy, well-adjuste- d, good kids? I for sure.' can't say But it sure doesn't hurt. Ray Recchi is a lifestyle columnist for the Fort Laud-- . erdale Sun-Sentin- "Inriiriiiii ntitwaiiT1- - mtm, ri AP Photos were served first because they were the oldest. If there - . Lamar Notargiacomo, left, assists her daughter Cherie, 9, with her spelling homework while feeding her infant daughter Meagan, 2 12 months, at their home in North Miami, Fla. Daughter Renee, 7, is in the back ground working on her math. Both girls are doing well with home school. and other students for specialty subjects like music. been prosecuted for not complying with compulsory laws. Under a steady assault by lawyers and lobbyists for the home school movement, those laws have been rewritten to legalize home education in all 50 states. Thirty-fou- r states adopted home school statutes between 1982 and 1991. It's legal, but still not easy in some states, where school districts are fighting home schooling every step of the way, Somerville said. In Michigan, for instance, the state still requires parents who teach their children to be certified teachers, he said. Parents who home school children for religious reasons are exempt from the certification. In Lynn, Mass., the school board demanded that school officials be allowed to inspect the homes of parents who want to teach their children at home. Michael and Virginia Brunelle are fighting the Lynn school board in a court battle that has been going on for three years. "What local officials in Massachusetts are saying is, 'Give us the said keys to your home,'" Somerville, who travels around the United States fighting legal battles for the Home School Legal Defense Association. Virginia has a religious exemption from school attendance laws, but getting that exemption can be tough because local school boards are allowed to decide who is sufficiently religious. But most states have few rules on home schooling, and the few rules they have are flexible. State courts in North Carolina, Indiana, Illinois and Texas have ruled that home schools that comply with minimal private school standards are free to operate legal- school-attendan- ly as private schools. In Florida, parents need no spe- cial education or training to teach their children. And they can choose one of five ways to test their children once a year to show the school board that the job is getting done. Mrs. Notargiacomo, the Miami mother, has her children take the Iowa Tests of Basic Skills. Florida parents also can have their children tested by the certified teacher of their choice. The Notargiacomo home is like that of most other home school families one parent works and the other stays home and teaches, an arrangement that puts a strain on the budget. Mrs. Notargiacomo's husband. Richard, is a construction manager who works 50 to 60 hours a week. II "He works long hours hours a day. but our family is strong. The kids see a lot of us, and they worship their father. You should see them when he comes home. "I think that's the main reason it builds a we home school strong family," she says. But home schooling is not for the lazy parent. "Do you mind if I finish scrambling the eggs while I talk to you?" Mrs. Notargiacomo asked as she was being interviewed in her kitchen. "It's tough. It's a challenge." she said later, after putting the baby to sleep and getting the children started on their studies. The Florida Parent Educators Association estimates there are child about 20.000 dren in the state. About 10.(XX) of those are in small groups of 25 or more. Having 25 pupils qualifies a group as a private school in Florida. Jan Prentice, who home schools three children, ages 9 to 16, says it can be physically and emotionally home-schoole- exhausting. Dear Ann Landers: I am still in tears after reading about an incredible incident that occurred here in Silsbee, Texas. Please help me understand it. Eleven children between 8 and 14 years of age chased a quarter horse into a barbed wire fence and County Sheriff H.R. Holzapfel. The junior high school students, eight boys and a girl, were arrested on criminal mischief charges after they were overheard bragging beat the animal to death with sticks. According to the county probation officer, the kids were bored and looking for some mischief they might get into. Mischief? When we were kids, mischief was wrapping a few hundred sheets of toilet paper around some bushes in the neighbors' yard. Torturing an animal was unthinkable. This crime has outraged our town. The horse, named "Mr. Wilson Boy," belonged to Charles Woodard, the football coach at Silsbee High School. Like everyone else, Woodard was baffled and heartsick. Meanwhile, the children laughed about thrashing the horse to death and bragged at school about how cool it was. "They stil! think it's funny," according to '"t" Landers about what they had done. Two others were too young to be charged. The youngsters confessed to chasing the horse into the fence, where he became entangled and broke his leg. A couple of the children started to hit the horse, and one boy shoved a stick up the animal's nostril. They then beat the wounded horse with sticks until it died. "Mob mentality," said Sheriff Holzapfel. "They aren't even sorry." Ann, this is frightening. Will you please print this letter and Sick at Heart in Silscomment? bee Dear Silsbee: Since you wrote, six of the children in question have been removed from their homes by the court, according to Clinton Wright, chief juvenile probation officer for Hardin County. There was insufficient evidence to bring the other three to trial. Any youngster who would commit such a crime has not had decent parenting. The parents or guardians of these children should be made, by law, to attend several counseling sessions. These children need special attention from mental health professionals as well, and 1 pray that they are getting it. If beating an animal to death is their idea of fun, Lord knows what they will be doing five years from now. Dear Ann Landers: Last year, my husband and I bought a duplex. We decided to rent the upstairs apartment to my husband's brother and his wife because they are easy to get along with. A few months after "Ron" and "Sally" moved in,. Sally surprised him with a Great Dane puppy. "Buster" is now bigger than a pony and will soon be the size of a horse. They are crazy about the dog, and we've grown fond of him, too. The problem developed gradually. It seems Buster sleeps at the foot of their bed, and their bedroom is right above ours. At first, it sounded like someone was sawing wood. Very soon, we were sure either Ron or Sally had started to snore. Now, we are convinced it's Buster. We told Ron and Sally about it, and they say they don't hear a thing. Question: Can a dog be fixed so the snoring will stop? We'd be glad to pay for it. We need to know before w e broach the subSleepless in Schenectady ject. Dear Sleepless: The answer is yes. Check your vet, and start saving your money. It won't be cheap, but it'll be worth it. Prentice, who has a high school diploma and two years of college training, says she often stays up after the children have gone to bed in order to prepare for the next day's lessons. "It isn't something I would recommend to everyone." she says. Prentice reads textbooks, makes assignments, gives homework and tests, grades papers and explains the tough subjects. Parents in her neighborhood who also teach their own children ptol their money to hire drama coaches and music instructors to teach their children in group settings in community centers and churches. They also take joint field trips. Most universities have opened their doors to home schoolers, including Harvard and other Ivy League schools. The military academies accept them, and the Air Force Academy has just set aside 2 percent of its enrollment for home schoolers. "Home schoolers are embarrassing the public school system," Somerville contends. "When a housewife with $ 50 worth of textbooks can outperform the" public schools, then maybe it's time for a 1 change." |