Show Bit BitO O Stuff By Sara and Craig Staff Writers As many of our readers may have noticed a strongly worded letter maligning not only our writing but also our integrity was published on the editorial l page of this paper two weeks ago Since many of you may not l have had a chance to read the appalling and unoriginal colt column column col col- col- col t I we wrote last quarter wed we'd wedI like to present it to you now with some new additions All AU of this is original material none of it pirated from any other source I f This is a Sport You know a sport is not a ar aI r I sport when- when Two games can be played back to back and the only people who get tired are the fans The vendor throwing peanuts to patrons gets more exercise than 6 4 2 f k 46 4 2 the athletes Fathers and sons can play together at the highest competitive tive level The only reason you need to wash your uniform between games is because you dribbled chew on yourself or somebody spat on you reason you sweat is because the stadium lights are too bright There is more scratching than catching contributed contributed by John Whitehead There is more spitting than hitting Colored Dirt We had all kinds of colorful notions as to why the ing was green when it was initial initial- ly sprayed onto our campus We thought maybe green was the color of a chemical super er Cr Or perhaps the tint was meant to uplift our spirits while we waite waited wait wait- e ed for real grass We had a sneaking suspicion that the color was meant to affect the human and pest psyches in away a away away way that prevents one from disturbing disturbing disturbing dis dis- dis- dis the fragile areas Since the color bleaches out fter several several sever sever- al days the dye doesn't make much of a beacon or landing pad for alien ships that cant can't be a logical logical log log- logical ical reason Hmm we said we smell a conspiracy After much research and red tape we discovered that the dye is there to show the hydro seeders where they have already sprayed Weeding Hydro-Weeding The grass here at Redwood Campus has grown steadily since the revolutionary process of was performed The weeds however are arc prospering prospering prosper prosper- prospering ing twice as well Near the Alder Amphitheater we measured a weed tall |