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Show Kathleen Norris Says: . - i Fiances Fears Are Unjustified j Bell Syndicate. WNU Feature f - i - II fj ill A- I'll I "Be made himself to adorable to my father, sister and old Sophy that all resistance on my part seemed ridiculous." By KATHLEEN NORRIS LINDA has been engaged for four years. That is a long time for an American girl to wait for her wedding. In Europe it is different. A six or seven years engagement doesn't disturb a girl there, because be-cause just so much social and financial adjusting must go on, and engagements are family matters, considered and accepted ac-cepted as solemn contracts; breaking an engagement is almost al-most as serious as a divorce. Linda said "Yes" to CharleB in 1944, while the gTeat war was on. Charles went off to the South seas, Linda stayed home with her mother and her blind father. Before Charles came back Linda's mother died, leaving a 17-year-old sister to Linda's care, as well as their father. The sister Betsey, is evidently a popular and busy girl, away at college most of the time. The home is a roomy old-fashioned one and the family has a good servant. Inasmuch as no small apartments are available and Linda's Lin-da's father is dependent upon her for comfort and care, although financially finan-cially responsible for the home and its upkeep, it seems natural to Linda, who is 28, to get married and keep husband, father, sister and herself in one family group. Fiance Is Afraid But Charles is afraid to try it. His mother's life was blighted by a nntiior-iri-law who for 20 years a comfortable home in which to begin be-gin your married life, and your doing do-ing your full duty to your fathei will only enhance Charles' appreciation apprecia-tion of you. Most Anxieties Needless Most of these engagement ; anx-fotips anx-fotips are unwarranted. A man wh usurped her place in her home and in her husband's affection and she has warned him against any such arrangement. He loves Linda, he will do anything for her, but not that. He likes her father, he thinks Betsey is a swell kid, but he has decided that he and Linda must wait until "something happens." Now, this waiting until "something "some-thing happens" is a favorite delusion de-lusion of us all when what we really hope is that someone will die. Linda's father is a strong and cheerful 60, he may easily live 15 years more. Her sister probably will marry but not for some time. "I've tried the trick of telling Charles that we had much better end the engagement than go on with any such expectation as this," says Linda's letter. "But that didn't work." In a day or two Charles telephoned, came out to tell me that we simply couldn't be parted. He made himself so adcyable to my father and sister, and even to old cfco tlint all resistance on my never will show jealousy again may make his sweetheart's life a burden while they are engaged. A girl who throws her money about recklessly, is smartly dressed and is always on the go before marriage, may make the thriftiest and most economical of wives. Men who state boldly that they love night life and dining downtown turn into maddeningly domestic husbands, unwilling ever to leave the family fireside; men who are sure they despise babies become fatuous fathers; Robert, who asserts as-serts that he'll never live in the country and hates dogs, presently is telling you of early radishes and the fidelity of old Binky, and girls who despise the kitchen go in for cookies and curried eggs on a big scale. Love is the alchemy that works these miracles and since you and Charles truly love each other, you need have no fear. Forget his mother's gloomy prophesies pro-phesies as you prove to her that she is wrong. Your own good sense will teach tft Houplnn n frifindshiD between part seemed ridiculous and things went back to their old status. "Frankly, he is afraid. He says he would not be jealous, that he loves to have me read to my father, that our home is the most harmonious harmon-ious he has ever known. His war record shows that he never shrinks back from anything he undertakes. But still he hesitates to marry. And of course that makes me hesitant, hesi-tant, too. Will you tell me if you think he is right, or might we go ahead and take a chance?" My dear Linda, you would be taking no chance and neither would he. This delay is a nervous Btrain on you both, and you have worked yourself up into quite unneccessary distress over it. You " are a fine sensitive, loving woman, you have your two men, how to delegate some of your daughterly duties to Betsey, .how to refer everything first to Charles and seem to act on his advice ad-vice even when you don't. All loving lov-ing wives learn this trick. Make that home of yours the happiest hap-piest in town. Carry things from this moment with a high hand. Tell Charles when you are going to be married and make it soon. Put it in the paper. Plan straight ahead for your honeymoon, your home arrangements; ar-rangements; be completely happy yourself about it,-and you'll find that he not only falls into line, but that he'B happier than you are, and when presently he convinces himself that the whole thing was his idea, and that he had to talk you over to it, be sure you leave him in this fond delusion. Talking Turkey The expression "talking turkey" generally is attributed to an Indian who roamed through a patch of woods in New Hampshire in 1850. It seems the Indian and a white man went hunting and agreed to split the spoils. They bagged a fat wild turkey and an old black crow. The fast-talking white man said: "I'll take the turkey and you take the crow; or you take the crow and I'll take the turkey." "Ugh," the Indian grunted. "You no talk turkey." j Hit mother's life toot blighted . . . |
