OCR Text |
Show - By L. L. STEVENSON The City Speaks: If you happen to be walking along Fifth avenue or Broadway or riding in the subway just keep your ears wide open. You won't hear much music except perhaps per-haps a passing taxi or the crash of wheels on steel rails, but, brother, you'll find out soon enough what they mean by a big city slicker. You're walking along Broadway for instance, and what do you hear? Faith: "He promised me a part but now that the show's opening next week, I guess all my friendship was for nothing." Hope: "He told me to drop him a card with my name and address and wait until I heard from him." Charity: Honest, chief, I gotta get over to Joisey. Me mud-der mud-der is dyin'. All I need is a quarter. quar-ter. Whatta you say, Mac, huh?" Jersey bounce: "For a guy with , his name and his following, he knows as much about music as Donald Don-ald Duck." The Three B's: "Between "Be-tween Shostakovitch and Tschaikov-sky, Tschaikov-sky, give me Debussy." Casting: "I walked up to him and opened my mouth. 'Not the type,' he says. I open my mouth again. ' 'No,' he says. That's all there was to it." The dance: " 'Trim' he says to me. 'You oughta go far in this racket. Yes, sir, with what you got on the frame, you're a cinch.' " Classical: "There is no appreciation of the unities in our theater. I should go so far as to say it stinks." Ta - ra - ra - boom - de - ay: "Bumps? When she does 'em, she loosens the supports under the balcony." bal-cony." Moneybags: "I'd be willing to put up the dough only you got to get me an expert opinion someone like Katharine Cornell." Jungle Love: "She has no right to call him her husband. If it wasn't for the children, she wouldn't have a leg to stand on." Out-of-towner: "So this is Broadway! Looks like any other street to me except there's more people walking around on it." Fifth Avenue Smart Shop: "Devastating "Dev-astating original! It has just the verve the real spark of youth! So!" The acquisitive instinct: "I like the one with all the shiny little diamonds. dia-monds. But it's much too expensive. ex-pensive. We've got to consider the future." The American-born, purse-proud purse-proud refugee from Paris: "Ah, le Etats-Unis, what a wonderful people. But surely, they do not know how to live." (The old man probably prob-ably got the dough by selling confederate con-federate money to immigrants.) Big business: "Certainly I had several millions in it. Not strictly legitimate legiti-mate butf good business very good business." The 400: "I should invite her! She doesn't even know what fork to use for the potato salad." Romance: "So I says to him, 'Whadda you mean, tryin' to kiss me?' And he savs to me. 'I'm sorry.' Howdaya like that!" Voice of the Subway: Cloak and suit: "That contractor! If he wasn't my brother-in-law, I'd stop doing business with the cut-throat." Transport Trans-port worker: "Look out, bud! Wait for the next one. Wanna kill someone?" some-one?" Office worker (blond and very shapely): "Every time he dic-' dic-' tates to me, he looks at me so nice I'm sure of it now." Department store saleslady to department store saleslady: "She says to me, 'I take size 36' and I says to her polite-like, polite-like, 'Madam, that's understatement understate-ment on your part' and did she burn!" Sport of kings: "What a horse! If he ran any slower, he'd be beside himself." Politics, Washington: Washing-ton: "I talked with him but he's incorruptible no dice." Politics, Albany: Al-bany: "Our next governor will have to play ball or he won't last as long as that." Politics, City Hall: We've got enough asphalt to last two administrations." Love's Labor: There's a story connected con-nected with the Heifltz string. While playing in Buffalo, Johnny went over to the auditorium where Heifitz was giving a concert to get an "E" string, his visit being a follow-up to a note explaining his hobby, which he had sent a few days previously. For more than an hour, he stood in the rain and when finally brought into the presence of the great violinist, he was drenched from head to toe. As he apologized for his appearance, Heifltz, possessed pos-sessed of a great sense of humor, burst into laughter and said, "Why, Johnny, I sent that string over to your hotel this morning." Bell Syndicate. WNU Features. |