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Show Just 151 SUCCESSFUL TOUR "We must go to Stratford," a tourist tour-ist on a visit to England said to bis wife. "What's the use of that?" asked she. "We can buy Stratford postcards post-cards in London." "My dear, one travels for something some-thing more than to send postcards ! I want to write my name on Shakespeare's Shake-speare's tomb !" Montreal Star. Encouragement At an English theater they were playing "The Forty Thieves," and as the company numbered only eight, the entry of the robbers Into the cave was achieved by their passing out at the back of the stage and entering en-tering again nt the front. Unfortunately one of the robbers walked with n limp, and when he had entered five times a voice from the gallery cried : "Stick It, Iloppy ; last lap!" And He Went His Way Sinister-Looking Individual (significantly) (sig-nificantly) Is yer 'usband at 'ome, ma'am? Lady (resourcefully) Well, If he's finished his revolver practice, he'll be playing In the back garden with our bloodhounds. Did you want to see him? London Tit-Bits. Hard Luck's Limit They were discussing their bad luck. "Do you know, Bill," said one, "my luck is so dead out that if I threw a dollar bill into the air it would come down an Income tax demand note." The Whole Story "Hello, Smith, old man, haven't seen you for some time." "Been In bed seven weeks." "Oh, that's too bad. Flu, I suppose?" sup-pose?" "Yes, and crashed !" Montreal Star. |