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Show Ideas for Better Living SelfisEmess Is Chief Cause of Divorce A recent survey showed If you have a question or topic you would like Dr. Mc-Bride Mc-Bride to discuss in his column, write: Dr. M. Ford McBride, 1161 East 300 North, Provo, Utah 84601. that one of the chief causes of divorce is selfishness. Selfishness may not be the legal rea-son rea-son given for divorce, but it is 11.. 4 x hi few " !LiJ usually liic underlying factor. A selfish person is self-oriented, self-oriented, his needs are a first priority. I've found that if a marriage partner insists on meeting his or her needs first it doesn't take the other long to be just as selfish. Unfortunately, Unfor-tunately, selfishness encourages en-courages selfishness. Selfishness is counter to the purpose and intent of marriage because it inhibits growth and development. Without growth and development, there can't be a free interchange of ideas and feelings. A patient confided that her life was miserable because her husband refused to share his time or material possessions. He was like an immature, uncaring chaild. he not only refused to share materially, but emotionally as well. What can an individual do to overcome selfishness? A first step is to change how you perceive yourself. This isn't easy. People who are selfish think of themselves as selfish, the selfish behavior will continue until there is a change in self-perception. An effective way of changing opinions about yourself is to act as if you were giving and unselfish. You will find that as you act the part, it will be come part of you and pretending preten-ding will no longer be necessary. A second idea is to consider your spouse's point of view. Be willing to compromise. A characteristic of the unselfish individual is that he or she is willing to look at and consider con-sider other points of view. A successful marriage takes work and striving for unselfishness is insurance that will pay valuable dividends as the years pass. Dr. McBride can be seen every Tuesday on Channel ll's "Newsroom" at 6:00 p.m. |