OCR Text |
Show LkJ : 1 David doesn't write here anymore... Perhaps you noticed. David has not been diagnosed as seriously ill. Some of his humor is occasionally sick, but that's not the same thing. O.K. So a number of well-known columnists have been guilty of reprinting past sins; Ann Landers, Art Buchwald, and Dan Valentine, come quickly to mind. Emulating the Salt lake Tribune's Dan Valentine, David (The Ten O'Clock Whistle) Fleisher has been re-printing some of his favorite old columns. Re-printing old news is no news here (see Park Record Editorial policy). Even the competition at the Newspaper office has been guilty of that one. (Although I am personally fond of Tina Moench, I saw no real reason for the Newspaper to run their "Go Big Ed." editorial to her, twice. Yes, Hampshire, a few of us noticed.) But like the Ten O'Uock Whistle occasionally heard on Main St., when it's not there and really, David your column is missed. David is busy. He is writing a book. I understand that. Still, a good Whistle should be served like a good bagel-fresh, hot off the press, hard on the outside, soft on the inside. A good Whistle is predictable; there will be a statement by David which will introduce the subject matter of the column (you are never left guessing) and that will be followed by David's humorous perspective on the subject matter. Past Whistle's (as they are affectionately called) include David on national politics, David on local politics, David on meetings, David on national - sports, David on local sports, David on theatre, David on traffic, David on food, David on families, David on lovelife, David on David... Coming up with fresh material each week for a column is tough business. (As readers of this column know firsthand.) It is particularly difficult for those of us who report on people, places and things. I have often thought I would just write a generic column that could be used any old week when I didn't feel like writing. For example: You can't tell the players without a program... Ever notice how from week to week some things change and some things remain the same? (God, is that brillant, make note to . reuse that phrase again...) Well, here we go. Ross and (fill in favorite blond of the week) were spotted playing kissy face at (choices here are Jody s, DownUnder, and Janeaux'). Sitting at the next table was irrate city councilwoman (just two choices here) who was arguing with (choices unlimited here)." You, dear reader, can see how terribly difficult that kind of column would be. And as far as actually repeating "people news" from six months or a year ago, well, you can imagine the problems in readers that Mr. X seemed to be back with his first wife when you had just seen him with his second wife at which time they were seated next to his first wife who was seated with the second wife's first husband. Do you follow that? No, you see how confusing old gossip would be? So, I envy David. But then I always have. Two column David, just like writerhero, the San Francisco Chronicle's Herb Caen. I had hoped when I began writing for the Record that one day my writing would go two column on the cover of the second section. Advertisers would fight for the other three column space next to Vein just like old Macy's fought to be placed next to Herb. It would become the first thing that readers of papers would turn to. But alas, I have watched in supermarket check-out lines, and waited to be seated at hostess stands in coffee shops. It is the. Whistle they read first. I have often wondered why each Whistle ends with "as I walk up Main Street I hear the Ten, O'Clock Whistle." Why up Main Street I pondered? Couldn't he just as easily walk down Main Street? After nights of first hand (to mouth) research I discovered that most nights one can find the handsome writer at the DownUnder (there is notruth to the rumor that David, Dustin Hoffman and Al Pacchino are all the same person). So, to reach David's Main Street aparement he must walk up. Main Street from the DownUnder End of mystery. David, David, David. We want you fresh. Poking fun at city meetings and poking fun at the weather and poking fun at holidays. I hope this column has struck a vein with you. As I walk down Main Street to deliver this column I hope I find a new Jen O'Clock Whistle in the typesetters box... |