Show KATHLEEN NORRIS S Care for the Old Person Upstairs THE TIME I was married married married mar- mar FROM ried 22 years ago writes a Massachusetts woman I have had the care of one helpless member of the family after another First it was my husbands husband's dear old grandmother who lived with us and while she was bright and independent independent independent inde inde- pendent and we all nIl loved her she could not assume responsibility for anything After some years of that my myown myown myown own beloved father and mother moved in when they came back from long residence in the Orient and after niter Dad suddenly died Mother settled down here for tor the remaining years of her life She was a semi invalid bright and amusing and loved by my children but a real care as trays had to go up to her rooms on the third floor loor three times a day for eleven years Mothers death left me really desolate but her room was not long empty My husbands husband's fine mother died in California and his father came to us His father lather who is generosity itself owns this comfortable comfortable comfortable com com- old family home in which we have always lived and of course has every right here as aswell aswell aswell well as a claim on us but I can assure you that my heart failed me when the business of consideration tion for one more old person had to take first place in our domestic plan Now I not only have this good patient but almost helpless old man but the charge of an adorable adorable adorable ador ador- able small niece who is recovering from a serious bout with polio pollo Lifetime Devoted to IllAs Ill III As a result this serious semi-serious letter continues my entire married married married mar mar- ried life has been geared to the care of persons not able to take care of themselves And as we all know almost every family has one of these persons The homes that care for them charge as high as per week for very ordinary SJ r ff a semi invalid accommodation and are at their cheapest out of reach of the average average average av av- av- av family budget So we have to fix trays and clear trays make beds up fresh give baths and have on tap endless sympathy and understanding under under- standing We are not rich Harriet Gillespies Gillespie's Gillespie's Gillespies Gillespies Gillespie's Gilles- Gilles pies pie's letter continues but we are comfortable beyond any reasonable complaint I have had one good kitchen helper for tor more than 15 years and also now have hav a practical practical practical nurse for my two invalids But what Im I'm writing you for foris foris foris is a protest against this intrusion into the family circle of these derelicts dere dere- beloved beloved perhaps but still derelicts Sam and I haven't had two years out of ot our 22 without one or the other of them Our son and daughters have grown up Inan in inan inan an atmosphere of run upstairs dear and see if somebody if-somebody Is all allright right Surely there must be some more reasonable and economical way yay of t solving this problem Is it right for these older or er invalid persons per per- sons IOns simply imply to settle down on the tho more vigorous ones and expect the sacrifices that are inevitable All Families Face It Harriet is quite within the truth when she says that almost every family at one time or another has had to face the tedious endless care o of an nn aged person whose life however active and honorable has come down to feebleness and dependence dependence dependence de de- de- de and seeming uselessness Seeming uselessness you note I say For these burdens are anything anything anything any any- thing but useless really and the fruit of their effect upon our homes is an invaluable one No training could be of more use to growing boys and girls than this constant reminder of the sacred obligation that is upon us all to make the last years of old persons dignified and comfortable and to give them if i. i we possibly can the sense of being I loved I This good bood healthy protest Impresses impresses im presses me as coming from a generous generous generous gen gen- erous fine woman who has shouldered shouldered shouldered dered the problem of these exacting exacting exacting exact exact- ing guests with great spirit and capability Note that it is a dearold dearold dear dearold old grandmother a beloved father and mother and a Ua fine old father to say nothing of the adorable small niece No Harriet Gillespie wrote in hi a burst of natured good-natured impatience Perhaps she had just chanced to calculate exactly how many of her married years had been spent in nursing and guarding her old peo peo- But in her heart she knows that it is good for a boy of 15 to have had years of carrying trays upstairs upstairs upstairs up up- stairs good for young girls to pay daily visits to the sickroom developing developing developing de de- de- de their young sympathy for forthe forthe forthe the old and suffering Why not take this situation as normal Our fashion of living is peculiarly American Older nations and we ourselves in the beginning took the inclusion of ot the old grandmother grandmother grandmother grand grand- mother the maiden spinster aunt the orphaned small cousins as a natural natural nat nat- ural part of the family Youngsters learned in their own homes what it meant to be considerate self- self sacrificing understanding of lifes life's tragedies and problems Incidentally Incidental Incidental- ly there was less divorce under that system less nervous breaking down fewer calls for the psychiatrist psychia psychia- trist |