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Show HAD THE WAITER GUESSING He Had Never Before Received Just Such an Order. Once a short little woman and her tall husband went to a cafe of the. cheaper sort for dinner. "Will you have oysters?" asked the husband, glancing over the bill of fare. "Yes," said the little woman, as she-tried she-tried in vain to touch her feet to that floor, "and, Henry, I want a hassock." Henry nodded, and as he handed his order to the waiter, said: "Yes and 'bring the lady a hassock." "One hassock?" asked the waiter, with what Henry thought more than ordinary interest, as he nodded in the-affirmative. the-affirmative. Still the -waiter did not- go but brushed the tablecloth witE a towel and rearranged the articles on. it several times, while his face got red. Then he came around to the husband's hus-band's side, and, speaking in a whisper, whis-per, said: "Say, mister, I haven't been here long, and I'm not on to all these things. Will the lady have the hassock has-sock 'broiled or fried?" He Wouldn't Stay. Two workmen met in the street and stopped to chat about their friends. "Casey seems to he doing well where he is," remarks one presently. "He'll not stop long at that job," replied the other, with a gloomy shake of the head. "Why not? He seems to be quite comfortably placed." "But he'll not stay there a month. I say it, and I've said it ever since he got that job eighteen months ago." Chicago News. Repartee. "Ah, would I were a glove upon that hand," quoted the ardent swain. "Quit your kidding," retorted his lady love. Had Missed Something. Mrs. McGreevy was a dinner guest one evening where a noted explorer was the attraction. Being of a somewhat some-what languid turn of mind, she paid more attention, to her dinner than tc the conversation. After dinner was over, she turned to one of the guesti and asked: "What was that tiresome old explorer ex-plorer talking ahout?" "Progressive Patagonia," was the reply. re-ply. "Really?" asked Mrs McGreevy with sudden interest. "And how do you play it?" Wanted the Medal. The man Lemme go' I'm all right; I can swim. The girl i don't care. I'm going to save you. I want a medal. Chicago Chi-cago Herald. Woman's Curiosity. Gladys Why did vou refuse him it you loved him? Gwen Well, you see, he said couldn't live without me, and it aroused my curosity. Sydney Bulletin-Once Bulletin-Once Was Enough. Precocious Offspring Pa, may 1 ask just one more question? Patient Pater. Yes, my son. Just one more. Precocious Offspring Well then-pa, then-pa, how is it that while the Mbl taila- '''a thejlayjhat breaks The Trials of Percy. "My, ,but Percy has growt to be big boy. How tall are 'you, Percy" "Just an inch short of being to wear father's tennis trousers. they'll be all right by next summer" |