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Show SOME SUGGESTIONS FOR XMAS PRESENTS. j Wouldn't it be a good idea to present Chief Lynch with a chart of the paved district so that he could station a few patrolmen where the hold ups are operating? j A reduction plant, for use when the monthly j statements are issued, might come in handy for i the Utah Light & Railway company. j The burning of a hierarch in effigy in the edi- 3 torial rooms of the Tribune should be a source of ; cheer to the tenants of that section for the rest of the week. ! A set of tweezers, with which to get a firm grip on his H's, would be of great value to I Gov'nah Cutlah. j Bruder Fernstrom would probably greatly ap- preciate a cabinet sized picture of King Haagon, ; who is said to greatly resemble the local Swede ; in many respects, particularly in his laceration of ! English. ; How about a fancy vest for Councilman-elect I Martin Mulvey bell shaped preferred. j A set of roller skates might be a great help j to Senator Smoot in his forthcoming hurried departure de-parture from the U. S. Senate. For the Tribune a set of loaded dice, with presentation speech by Bailey Youngston. -j For Bailey Youngston one year's subscription to the Tribune. For the editor of Truth his second papers. For the editor of the Deseret Newsa complete com-plete set of the works of the late Baron Munchausen. Munchau-sen. For the chief hierarch a new set of wires for revelation purposes, to replace those which have been crossed ever since he became president. For Apostles Cowley and Taylor a letter of introduction to Chairman Burrows. For the Telegram a patent device for enlarging en-larging type. For W. R. Jones, Jr., a case of deodorizer. |