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Show R THE LADIES. Hf (Mr. Kipling's Meter.) HE I've taken my fun where I found it, m From Utah to Kalamazoo. Hl I've 'ad my piclcin' o' sweet'earts, H An' some o' the lot was true. Hp The first was a clever woman, K The second one is my wife, K The third has a home where she hangs her hat; Hh And the cause of my daily strife. Kf "Now I aren't no 'and with the ladies, H, For, takin' 'em all along, K You never can say till you've tried 'em, K! An' then you are like to be wrong. HM There's times when you'll think that you mightn't, H There's times when you'll know that you might; H But the things you will learn from the Bradley an' H Brown Bj Will 'elp you an awful damn sight. H I was a novice in Utah Hb Shy as a girl to begin; K Sweet Anna Bradley, she caught me, Hft And Anna was clever as sin, Hj Gave me what doctor had ordered, M More like a mother she were f Showed me the way to a happier day f An' I learned about worn n from 'er. HL Next with the diligence dunging, Hra Some gentlemen dressed up in blue HUr Asked me to ride to the station, V7 Asked me to ride, an' her to; H Served me with documents many B I hardly knew what it were, M . Itwas jealousy's cup, an' I drank an' woke up E An' I learned about women from ?er. j We shifted to old Pocatello. m They met in the village hotel: B r And they raised what in barrister patois K Is familiarly known as hell. H An eye for an eye in a minute, V An 'air for a 'air an' a tooth m An' I learned about wimmin without any trlmmin', Q I learned or 'em, ain't it the truth? H "I've taken my fun where I found it, H j An' now I must pay for my fun, f For the more you 'ave known o' the others H The less will you settle to one; Hv An' the end of it's sittin an' thinldn', M An' dreamin' hell fires to see, m So be warned by my lot (which I know you will ' not), B An' learn about women from me." H TOD GOODWIN. |