Show in chicago mrs babash I 1 always said my laughter would make a name tor her belt mrs dearborn has shea she s made tour she s got her tou th einband yonkers states division of labor matters are apportioned out fair division thus it leaves mother uses elbow grease daughter uses elbow sleeves N sun diplomatic refusal darlie old man lend me a dol 1 a few days I 1 when I 1 come back from I 1 kanep din t know you were going to t manre I 1 m not tit bits sorrow of it many a good man has forgotten that there s no place it home V hen the crook la in his elbow A d the beer Is topped with foam chicago da ly news disappointed maire why did you allow him to turn down the gasa adyth oh merely out of curiosity I 1 to see it he would try to kiss mayme and was your curiosity sat leflek blytt I 1 should say nota he only me once chicago dally news THE MADNESS OF IT to spend a week at a summer resort i and catch a breeze on the wing the dapper eight per week young man will resort to anything cincinnati enquirer the truthful grocer that sign you re writing there asked the grocer freh eggs replied the assistant make it fresh laid eggs why er everybody knows the eggs were fresh when they were laid exactly and all that its eafe tor us to say about them tit bits at ease how do you like your new house well answered mr it pleases mother and the girls but there are so many pictures and statues and vases that I 1 feel we ought to run a railing in front of each wall and hang hands off labels on it wash ington star he got it whose funeral do you want to attend office boy de umpire s N sun A GREAT PLENTY ethel that Is your first ancestor I 1 supposed 9 oh no but when we got back to him we thought we d goi enough of em you know chicago dally news exercise for the iceman vo wonder he feels sad and gore he has to rush though hot the day to get the lump beta e your door before it melts and runs away washington star his impression I 1 snail go to the arctic regions said the dauntless explorer well answered col stillwell of kentucky I 1 can t say I 1 care for abe arctic regions my impression of them Is a place with a whole lot of ice and nothing worth drinking to put it in washington star the har of the head the father had gone away and left hta only son in charge of the shop are you the head of the firm asked a man with a sample case en bering the nt no sir remarked the young man with great urbanity I 1 m only the heir of the head tit bits striving to please do you expect to raise any hay this year not much answered mr corotos bel only jest enough to make the place look like a farm so s to satisfy the beelin s of the summer boarders washington star on the sofa keep your distance sir bure I 1 choose to keep this one cleveland leader sudden change of mind puffing and blowing the fat passe n ger began to climb to the upper berth in the sleeping car pretty hard work isn t it said the man in the lower berth it Is answered the fat passenger for a man of my weight how much do you weigh may I 1 aska tin hundred and eighty seven pounds hold on take this one ex claimed the other his hair beginning to alie on end I 1 d rather sleep in the upper berth anyway the venti Is better chicago tribune HAVE ALL mr toured Is ethel s fiance a for eign nobleman 7 mrs toured I 1 think not arta me him in europe smallness the smallest man in the world went courting to show how very small he was let it be known that he laid neither 18 a dozen roses nor 3 a pound candy at the feet of his intend ed but only a quantity ot 5 cents a paper popcorn of course he an impossible fellow declared love disgustedly in speaking of the affair later there positively gasn wasn t enough of him to make any kind of a tool of so what was I 1 to doa puck study not to blame I 1 t think you would e your daughter study so hard that bei health was likely to be affected even or the sake of being abe to bradu ate oh it ten t studying that has mad her she has had such poor luch with the dressmaker chicago record herald CASE OF EXPOSURE she referring to scandal case 1 should hate to be exposed like that the major urn yes I 1 think these exposures are sometimes somewhat too pronounced nothing extraordinary the storekeeper of thrashers cor ner er ao ago I 1 read uv a castaway on a ship allvin fer 16 days on stewed rape yarn the banner humph that sol S pose he affirms now thet he owes ahli life tew havin been addicted tew breakfast food habit puck uncle alien s helpful suggestion speaking of that girt who broke her arm while trying to fasten the middle button at the back of he shirt waist said uncle alien sparks there isn t the slightest excuse joi such accident let an even n to her of buttons always be sewed on back of a shirt waist and there won I 1 oe any middle button chicago trib une the tinley the girl but what hakea you think she s been used to good so clety the brassy woman well dear U you notice she always says athani you to the servants and when she kisses you she never makes you fee as if she meant it he had been there old medical student are you look ing for new medical student yes old do do what do you want new do do no I 1 want to gel board la a private family old do do then you d beatter go to miss over the way you 11 be bored to death there in less than a month like the indians bill 1 see that dried flies are ei ported in large quantities from this country to england they are chiefly collected in the southern and western states and are used in the making ol 01 chicken feed hlll it looks very much then as il the only good fly is a dead one yon lers statesman an impractical idea I 1 have a areat idea this time eald the cheery inventor A noiseless lawn and what fun is there is a noise less lawn asked the capital 1st it wouldn t wake anybody up in the morning washington star |