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Show It's almost as easy to give good advice ad-vice as It Is not to follow It Among the things that we were not thinking of ordering Is a new alphabet alpha-bet Persons with no other form of amusement can watch the days grow longer. It Is difficult for some men to be pood when they have a good chance to be otherwise. A fresh egg of the season comes straight from a fresh chamber of the oold storage warehouse. St Louis girl, twelve years old, wants a divorce. Some of them certainly cer-tainly acquire the habit early. Germany has seventeen dirigible war balloons and England is fortunate fortu-nate In being too busy to worry. A Connecticut woman found a diamond dia-mond in a leg of lamb. And she wasn't anywhere near Winsted at the time. A girl umpired a baseball game in California the other day. Those California Cali-fornia women certainly are heroines. An imperial edict in Pekin orders the cutting off of queues. Switches and rats ought to be cheaper next year. A divorce law has been passed In the Philippines, but It will be a long time before Manila achieves the fame of Reno. Every time a Mexican patriot tires of work and longs for a little easy money, he organizes a new "revolution." Many a man who believes in doing the greatest good to the greatest number num-ber regards number one as the greatest great-est number. It has been decided by a court that collecting tips is begging. Thus the democratization of the bench proceeds delightfully. A Philadelphia physician says that mince pie, taken In moderation, will cure Insomnia. About how many triangles, tri-angles, doctor T New York's new "whispering whistle" for trains would be a great Institution to Introduce to Willie, the gifted office boy siffleur. The trouble with the man who goes to see a doctor generally Is that he wishes to be cured In a day of Ills it hag taken him years to acquire. The Bostonlan who claims that the earth Is flat would have been considered consid-ered a wise and conservative man in the days of Christopher Columbus. Jack rabbits with horns are said to be plentiful in the grand old state of Texas. Since when has Winsted, Conn., been transplanted to Texas? i Vesuvius has been throwing mud again. And yet people who live in the neighborhood probably think that Home, Sweet Home is a great little song. If you are a hotel guest, don't give your only pair of trousers to a bellboy, bell-boy, and then go to bed, for a cry of "fire!" would put you In a predicament "An eastern highbrow asserts that we are losing our sense of smell." From which we may infer that he doesn't live in a boiled cabbage neigh-borheod. neigh-borheod. The household furniture of the future fu-ture may be made of concrete, as Tom Edison says, but it will be necessary to hire a derrick and a freight train on moving day. ? A Jury awarded $300 damages to a woman who sued because a man failed fail-ed to marry her after sixty proposals. That places a handy and exact price upon a proposal. The Irony of fate appears to have been demonstrated in the case of the famous surgeon who was operated on for appendicitis when his trouble was caused by gallstones. It is announced that shoes are to cost more, and the family man will perhaps feel grateful that a long succession suc-cession of such announcements has made him somewhat callous. Reindeer meat is to be shipped from Alaska to Chicago, so that It may be served in the restaurants in Chicago. Unless it Is going to be a good deal cheaper than steak It will not be likely to cause much of a sensation. |