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Show Thursday, July li, THE VALLEY VIEW NEWS 1963 Page 3 AA V yv. W A AWAW WWl V.SVy.V M V SV., , SV.V.S A S f. (ft WW( K 1 t 0 0 8 I 4 'Now that the golf season is in topped the ball and it rolled smack full swing its time for a couple dab in the hole. The caddy was of my favorite golf stories. It seems one of the big time gamblers in Las Vegas decided to take up the sport. He bought himself a set of matched clubs and all of the paraphanelia that he could find. He headed for the golf course, hired a caddy and without as much as a word of advise from the pro. He went to the first tee, put the ball on the ground and asked the caddy for the short club with the heavy iron head. But thats the putter, the This is a 350 caddy remarked. yard hole. What you want is a number one wood. Listen kid, the gambler said, Im a self made man. I started out without a dime and now Im a multimillionaire. I never ask for advice so just keep your mouth shut and hand me that putter, or whatever you call it. The caddy did as he was told and the gambler approached the ball. His stance was wrong, his swing was wrong. In fact everything he did was wrong. But as luck would have it, he connected with the ball and somehow it ended up about two feet from the pin. When they got to where the ball was the gambler reached for the number three wood and approached the ball. Now is when you want to use the putter youre only a couple of feet from the pin. The gambler looked at the kid in disgust and said, I told you once and Im telling you again, I dont take any advice from anyone. Now keep youre mouth shut or Ill ram these clubs' down your throat, bag and all. He approached the ball. He stood with his ffet'jyart, he brought the club up oveF his shoulder and took a real healthy swing. He barely dumbfounded. The gambler stood there a minute or two and finally turned to the caddy and said, Im sorry for yelling at you. Actually everyonce in awhile I ask for advice. Tell me, what club do I use to get the ball out of the hole? The other story concerns a zoo keeper who spent all of his spare time teaching a gorilla how to play golf. After many frustrating months he thought his gorilla was ready for a match. He challenged 'Sam Snead to ga game and with the help of some publicity men the match was arranged. Sneed teed off first and got a beautiful drive. The zookeeper let his gorilla out of his cage, handed him a club and led him towards the ball. The gorilla clobbered the ball and it came to rest about six inches from the hole. A beautiful 325 yard drive. The gallery followed the players to the green. The trainer let the gori'la out of his cage again, handed him the putter and led him towards the ball. The gorilla looked at the bal, then at the cup and then at the ball again. He swung at the ball with his putter and you guessed it a nice tidy 325 yard putt. 4 k i I i I I .5 $ 4 ,1 RAY'S 5 Barber Shop 5460 South 4220 West I RAY PETERSON Wayne Hoobler Phone 298-004- 8 i FOLLOW THE STAR $ w TO Durfey Dry Cleaners And SHIRT LAUNDRY 3980 West 5415 South Cools like an ocean ibreeze! i Enjoy Complete Home Natural Gas Alp Conditioning this summer. Say goodbye to uncomfortable heat. ' ' - Kearns ' f y . ' t o Healthier cIumL ; Cleaner More Comfortable Economical Dependable ' Quiet t , Automatic . bM&Hi gxm ima $AKmzi?i3 ...fsredor rattana $ DEODORIZING HOLD PR00FJN3...W :tliLDiWPR00n';3...ps tm fSEE KOTHPS f2EBR39 bkSencecftbaqsalirdrycnsR. eateted to car cm rata details bn 'COMPLETE HOME Natural Gas Air Conditioning, contact your local Mountain Fuel , Supply Company office. For |