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Show m Ideas for better living. . . Lack of communication is barrier to marriage success by Dr. Ford McBride Timpanogos Community Mental Health Center This year in the United States, more than a million will couples seek a divorce. I wonder how and made her feel unwanted and inferior. The husband spoke up immediately and said, I didnt know you felt that way, why haven't you told me this before? Effective communication in this couple was almost many of these marriages could have been saved if communications skills had worked been onandimprov- - Dr. McBride ed. I have never seen a troubled marriage in which communica- tion was not a problem. Some couples retreat into silence, others argue. There are many reasons why a marriage ends in divorce, but indications are that poor communication is frequently an underlying factor. In counseling a young couple, the wife said that her husband cared nothing for her t. at all for 30 uninterrupted minutes every day. Before a partner responds, however, he or she must summarize what the other said. This exercise encourages careful listening. Another idea is to ask for your spouse for his or her opin- about something and then listen to that opinion without ion preparing a counter viewpoint. A communication technique called dialoguing is also useful. Each partner writes about A question couples often ask feelings concerning an importis whether it is too late to imant topic, such as love, life or prove communication or to children. These written commake changes. munications are then exMarriage counselor Robert changed and discussed to help Buchanan says that if a couple build mutual understanding. still feels some love for each There are hundred of other other, constructive changes can be made. It is the couples techniques that can be used to attitude toward change that is improve communication by any a key factor. Improving comtechnique is only as good as means making the couple's willingness to munication spend time and effort in machanges. There are numerous activ- king it work. If you have a question or ities couples can use to imeffective maintain and topic you would like Dr. Mcprove Bride to discuss in his column, communication. Counselor Lucy Ulman of write: Dr. M. Ford McBride, Newton, Mass, suggests that 11611 East Third North, Prothe couple talk about anything vo, Utah 84601. mm m mmrn m m' u5)ria (OHuggl Dear Editor: Concerned Citizens Committee, humph! "Bah, Humbug Committee made up of old Scrooges is a better title. I received a notice in my mail box which had no postage and no signatures on it and I have turned it over to the postmaster. The leaflet set forth several allegations made by the nameless committee who wrote it. I. It stated that the board of education had gone ahead and bought property and committed the district to a large bonding program when the bond had been turned down by the voters. My question is how many other districts vote for bonding 3, 4, or 5 times before the people see the light and finally pass the issue. Since it is necessary that something be done and money be spent to either build or remodel, why not take some positive action? The board has some right to exercise some initiative. II. The money from the state as stated by our state rep. Carry Peterson is a pretty sure thing. He stated at one hearing that the state is committed to this program. As see it, the Board of Education was fighting only two factors: 1, the pocket book and, 2. Nostalgia. I critics or bah, have not once mentioned the students and their rights to an equal education. I attended have III. most Other students in major areas all of the public meetings and of Utah have this right why concerned citi- shouldnt ours? if the zens had been seeking to be informed instead of looking for trivia they would recall that the board has repeated over and over that we are now at 17 mills and they need 18 mills to do the job. IV. If inflation were to stop I would imagine that the Board of Education could give the public exact figures on the exact cost and mill levy for the exact amount of time. However, I challenge anyone to look ahead for seven, eight or 14 years and predict the final cost or amount of time. Hanson Auto Parts Has Moved To The hum-bug- s I, like John Hancock, am not afraid to endorse what I believe by signing my name to it. I am not hiding behind some disguise in the form of a fancy title. Even though I am a teacher am also a taxpayer and a parent and I am willing to pay for the best for my children and possibly grandchildren. L. H. 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