| OCR Text |
Show - - - - - ' n- -v v v - v "V V V V v 7 " ' , , . - B8 Thursday, March 10, 1983 Park City News HDfi. IIBop &::: OKELLY- LEAVITT INSURANCE AGENCY.INC. SHIRLEYOKELLY AGENT ALL TYPES OF INSURANCE ml your 'independent . Insurance M agent , SIRVI& VOU ViMST 421 MAIN STREET 649- 683 1 The Branding Iron RESTAURANT ' NspflRKWEsri ; Enjoy panoramic mountain views and a superb menu, featuring: steak, chicken, veal, halibut, Chuck Wagon Salad Bar, daily German special, Branding Iron cheese soup Reservations: 649-7726 Parties up to 80 accepted. Shuttle Bus Service Available. Happy Hour Dinner 4:30-5:30 6:00-10:00' Claimjumper Restaurant 7 DATS I WSSS 6 -10 WBBULTS s - u wanns 9m U m Main Street 649-80S1 Jft Balloon Bouquets Only $20 for bouquet of 15. Parties & special orders available. Phone 649-3295 8 a.m. -12 midnight J A special bop-salute to all those who participated in last week's awesomely bitchin' snow sculpture competition at the golf course. All of the entries were bop-tacular ! Well, almost all the entries were bop-tacular. But Dr. Bop has to be honest with you, boppers. There was one entry in the snow sculpture competition that was an embarass-ment. embarass-ment. A travesty. A disgrace. A boppin' big disaster. If you were anywhere near the golf course last weekend, boppers, Dr. Bop is sure that you know which piece of snow sculpture Dr. Bop's referring to. That gruesome piece of rubbish was none other than radio station KPCW's. After seeing KPCW's sculpture, Dr. Bop was so embarrassed for all those involved that the good Dr. almost considered resigning from the Volunteer Army. Almost. Dr. Bop quickly came to his sense. No need giving up Dr. Bop's chance to rant and rave at the universe via KPCW's broadcast facilities every Friday afternoon from 3 to 5 p.m. No way Dr. Bop's gonna give his radio show up until Blair Feulner, Glenn Steigmeyer and the rest of the KPCW henchmen drag the good Dr. out the door screaming like a banshee. No way, boppers. Anyway, even though Dr. Bop didn't resign his post in the All Volunteer Air Force, it nonetheless remains a true bopism that KPCW's entry in the snow sculpture contest was awful. Atrocious. Unbecoming. It stunk up the place. Seriously, boppers. What went wrong? Dr. Bop's not sure. Dr. Bop saw the original plans. The mastermind behind the brutal fiasco was none other than KPCW stalwart, George Ricker. The plan was simple. A large Aztec-style snow pyramid about six feet high or so. On top of that was to be fashioned an old-style radio with the station's call letters-"KPCW" engraved over the speaker. On top of that they were going to FLORA Experience Unique Dining Join us in the Patio Greenhouse for Breakfast, Lunch or Dinner. Featuring Park City's Most Original Menu. Enjoy homemade soups, sandwich creations and our famous breakfast specialties, as well as reasonably priced steak, chicken and seafood entrees that include our fresh salad bar. Open every day 8:00 a.m. -10:00 p.m. Dinner Entrees available 5:00 p.m. -10:00 p.m. THE 5 ESTABLIMENT 317 MAIN STREET PARK CITY VISA & MASTER CHARGE sculpt a penguin. A penguin? That's right, boppers, a penguin. Why knows why. Somewhere in the grisly depths of George Ricker's frontal lobes lies the answer to that intriguing question. Anyway, it doesn't much matter why they were going to put a penguin on top of the radio on top of the Azec-style pyramid. Because nothing even remotely resembling resem-bling the original conception emerged from the proceedings. Not being the type of bopper who likes to spend long weekend hours transporting huge quantities of frozen water around the golf course, Dr. Bop was not in attendance during the actual construction of the KPCW monstrosity. But according to reliable reports (or, at least sort of reliable) from Dr. Bop's close colleague, Larry the Lawyer, there were many problems encountered by the KPCW crew during their act of atrociousness. (Incidentally, it should be noted that Larry the Lawyer contributed to the building of the KPCW monument of ignorance and is therefore partly to blame. Dr. Bop is always interested in seeing that blame is given where blame is due. ) Anyway, among the many problems encountered by the KPCW crew of snow sculptors was a severe morale letdown when they found out that George Ricker was in charge of the production. It's easy to see why, boppers. There is perhaps no more depressing a moment in a lifetime as when the realization settles into one's bop-brain that one is going to have to work long hard hours under the guidance of some duck like George Ricker. Some men are born leaders. Some men are born supervisors. If you've ever had a bad boss, you'll understand the distinction. Anyway that sleazeball Ricker definitely falls into the latter category. Okay, so Dr. Bop could understand how it might have been hard for the KPCW snow builders to have let their spirits lag a bit. What happened next, though, was their own fault, not Ricker's. To combat the severe depression resulting trom their knowledge that George was in charge, all the KPCW volunteers proceeded to get a boppin' big buzz on. Soon, the precision craftsmanship neces- INTERIORPLAK'TCARE FRESHFLOERS EDD1GS f Please call: 8oi 64Q bqio 649-8284 sary to execute Ricker's original conception of an Aztec-pyramid-with-a-radio-with-a-penguin motif was out the window. Free form snow sculpting reigned supreme. su-preme. So what the KPCW builders came up with, boppers, was an understandably boppin big mess. It could best be described as a giant snow boob with an erect nipple. That's the truth, boppers. KPCW's entry in the snow sculpture competition was a giant snow boob with an erect nipple. Have these people no concern for the morals and morality of this community? There were little bop-boys and bopettes running around the golf course last weekend. Do we want our nigra ts viewing giant snow boobs with erect nipples? Dr. Bop doesn't think so. Dr. Bop thinks that, because of the amoral atrocity the radio station forced upon this community last weekend, they should be banned from all further snow sculpture contests. Blair, Glenn, George, Larry the Lawyer and all you other KPCW people who built that giant boob should be ashamed. Speaking of people who have nothing to be ashamed of at all, Dr. Bop would like to send out a hearty big bop-birthday greeting to his beloved colleague at the Park City Newspaper (Dr. Bop's employer), Bill Dickson, otherwise affectionately known to one and all as "Pix." Pix shares with Dr. Bop an unquenchable thirst for knowledge of the universe and the world around us. To that end, on the occasion of Pix's birthday, Dr. Bop would like to share with him two important bits of cosmic truth that Dr. Bop has recently discovered. Yes, Pix, it's true. The wisdom of the ages and the inner secrets of God's universe are now at your fingertips. Literally. To get to the point, Pix, all of the secrets in the universe can be ascertained by closely studying two sources : 1) Public Broadcasting TV, especially the National Geographic specials but you should ( temper such selections by occasionally watching the "McNeil-Lehrer Report," and "World at War." 2) By far the most important source of universal knowledge is none other than the "Archie" comic book series. Pix, Dr. Bop strongly urges you to get the entire anthology of collected Archie's as soon as possible and read them religiously. Pay special attention to what Jughead says. In fact, it might' be worthwhile to go through and underline everything Jughead says for easy reference. You might even want to memorize everything Jughead says so you can use some of his lines and impress people at parties. No doubt about it, that Jughead was one of the wisest men to ever put on a beanie, chow down a burger and spout out a wise bopism or two. So there you have it, Pix, your birthday has been immortalized in Dr. Bop's column. Now will you maybe repair Dr. Bop's Bopmobile for free? Please, Pix. Speaking of skiing, where the heck is Dr. Bop's beloved colleague, Gary Heins, these days? You remember ol' Heins, don't you? The guy who wrote that column in the first section of the Newspaper each week "Smoking the Special Mixture" until a couple of issues ago. What happened to the guy? Where's his column these days? Is he dead? Heins passed his time between columns by working as a ski instructor. Have officials at the resort seen any pipes sticking out from under avalanche slides? Is Heins missing in action? Or did the pressure of big-time journalism just become too much for the talented young columnist from Montana? Just a reminder, boppers. If you read Dr. Bop's column last week, you must remember the big bop-talk about the benefit this Friday night for young lreestyle skiing wiuz, baa Kad Bumpin' Brad Holmes. The site will be the Holiday Inn. If you come at 9 p.m. armed with a five dollar bill you will be granted admission to a rock 'n' roll party spectacular, featuring three bands Comfort Zone, Otto Mileti's percussion group and the Dr. Bop band. It's gonna be a night to remember, boppers. And all the money goes to a good cause. Anyway, as added incentive, Dr. Bop is proud to announce that the benefit this Friday will mark the international debut of the Bopettes. The Bopettes are three lovely, charming and talented young women of the '80s whose collective vocal talents will be called upon to bolster the musical efforts of the Bop band at the Holiday Inn Friday night. In other words, the Bopettes are backup singers. And damn good ones, too, boppers. Just to introduce you, the Bopettes are: Bop-Jill, Bop Les and Bop-'la. Bop-Les and Bop-'la share a boppin'-bitchin' boppin'-bitchin' bachelorette pad above the Cattle Company. Bop-Les is from Cincinatti but has found that she's changed so much since she was just a little bopette that she doubts if she could live in Cincinnati ever again. Bop-'la is a carpenter (except when she can't find work). She is also a boppin' good acoustic guitarist and mandolin player. But, like all the Bopettes, with the Dr. Bop band she concentrates on singing. As for the remaining Bopette, Bop-Jill, all Dr. Bop can say is that she's the kind of girl who gets her hair cut and it's still real long. She also has a boppin'-bitchin' roommate named Maree who sounds like Olivia Neutron-Bomb when she talks. Dr. Bop thinks that Maree is from Australia but Dr. Bop doesn't know for sure because Dr. Bop never understands a word Maree says. For one thing, Maree calls bisquits "biddies." Awesome. Gnarly. Marie doesn't actually sing with the Dr. Bop band she's just an honorary Bopette. But she's got such a bitchin' accent that Dr. Bop thought he'd work her into the discussion somehow. Anyway, Dr. Bop hopes that you enjoyed this uD-close-and-personal look at what the fabled Bopettes are really like. Away from the bright lights, glitter and glamour of rock 'n' roll stardom, Bop-Jill, Bob-Les and Bop-'la are just three ail-American party animals. But believe the Dr. when he tells you, those girls can sing. Dr. Bop hopes that you will come hear the Bopettes do their stuff this Friday night at the Holiday Inn. Hey, we're serious about this. There's payin' dues and then there's payin' dues, but this is ridiculous... Old bluesmen called it "payin dues." As Ringo Starr sang in one of his biggest hits after the breakup of the four bop-mop-tops, "You gotta pay your dues, if you wanna sing the blues and you know it don't come easy." What they're talking about, boppers, is the simple life process. The process by which one takes a stand decides one wants to do a certain thing on certain terms and then proceeds to do it, accepting (and learning from) whatever obstacles and difficulties present themselves along the way. It's a process whereby one gains stamina, patience and depth of character. By payin' dues, one gets to sing the blues. By payin' dues, you get soul. Stories of musicians' sufferings and sacrifices in pursuit of their art are legendary. Just such a story is taking shape here in Park City. Dr. Bop is talking about none other than that earthy minstrel, Mountain John. The man has paid his dues. For starters, the cat lives in his truck just to survive. He'll tell you the rest of his .story, (Don't worry, he'll tell you whether you wanna hear it or not.)' vyju. ': So, if you wanna see and hear a musician-storyteller musician-storyteller who has really paid some dues, go see Mountain John the next time he's performing at the Alpine Prospector Lodge or the Alamo. So anyway, Mountain John, now that Dr. Bop has mentioned you in his column and told all the boppers to go see you perform, would you please quit calling and leaving messages at the Newspaper office telling Dr. Bop to write a story about you? Finally, Dr. Bop would like to conclude his column this week with a rare venture into the realm of sports. It seems that local skier Janna Vogel has had a particularly snake-bitten time of it in the town race series so far this year. It's not that she's had tough luck running the gates. In fact, she's competed very capably in the B class. It's just that this little hard-luck bopette has had trouble getting the proper credit for her efforts. For instance, a few town races ago Vogel was mentioned in the Newspaper's account of the competition. The paper mistakenly said that Vogel was one of the skiers who had had a tough time with the course that day. We said that she had taken a fall. Actually, she hadn't fallen at all. To top it off, during the race two Mondays ago she had an even worse sort of misfortune. Vogel actually finished third in the women's B class. But she didn't get any credit. The mix-up became apparent at the post-race party at the Black Pearl. Due to a bib switch on the mountain that day, some race times were credited to the wrong racers, until things were straightened out a couple of days later by race officials. Anyway, because of the bib screw-up, a woman who had actually finished way out of the running was given the first place trophy at the Black Pearl. Accordingly, second place went to the actual winner; third to the woman who had actually, as it turned out later, finished second. Vogel, who in reality finished third, was given no recognition at all. To make matters worse, when race officials figured the whole snafu out the next day and tried to get amended results to the local newspapers for publication, it turned out that Vogel still didn't get her due. You see, boppers, the person who had registered her for the race as part of a Mileti's team hadn't known her last name. Therefore, the third place winner in last week's "Scoreboard" was listed as one "Janna Johnson." No such women's B class racer exists, of course. Throughout it all, Vogel has kept her bop philosophy together. She says, "I guess 1 just wasn't meant to be famous." Anyone who can keep such a come-what-may attitude intact must have long ago learned the most important bopism of all. Which is, of course: Rock 'n' roll is for the young. Or at least the young at heart. So don't get too grown up. |
