Show dont plunge eastly but consider carefully promises you make by BILL VINES gentle reader for jan BEWARE uary 1 approaches it Is time tor you to begin to pause in your wild and woolly career or the nonce and consider wisely and well the particular style 0 good resolutions that it la your firm purpose to put into immediate and drastic effect on that date do not plunge hastily into the matter and waste a perfect ly good resolution from my personal experience I 1 know that it ta a human weakness in a moment ot sentimental and saffron hued regret to tie oneself up so tight in an ironbound and considered new years resolution that it takes frequently till january 15 to separate oneself from it and it can be done then only with considerable mental anguish and a badly lacerated conscience I 1 have on hand now a varied and general job lot assortment of shop worn good resolutions adopted by the committee on resola alons at its annual meeting sometime between the and of decem ber none of these resolutions has been used long at a time they are not frayed on the edges or in the bushing from excess of use they look awfully good at this gladsome time of the year when one s bank account appears delicate and remorseful this Is the time for a good resolution to make its strongest appeal to you you survey the field with an acx lous and appealing eye and looking tor comfort and succor the good resolution steps blandly forward with smile bright and cheerful looking with an open honest face like the in book agent it slips a blank into your ready and nerveless hand and says sign here you are in no mental or physical condition to refuse you can t turn anything down much less a good resolution it is likely the night before you could not even turn the bedclothes down but probably rested your weary head on the pillow and spread your classic form over the hand worked snow white counterpane you put your band to your solid ivory but throbbing nut and try to recollect your thoughts you mentally review the past and see nothing in it to cheer you up not a single bright spot on top of this someone sticks a package of letters under the door you open them slowly and there you find the gas bill the coal bill the rent bill the grocery bill and you vainly attempt to calculate at what time next spring by the strictest economy and by cutting out cigars and highballs high balls you can reasonably expect your bank account to be convalescent score 12 to 0 in favor of the good resola alon you try to remember it the good resolution now facing you looking so strong and vigorous has ever been introduced trod to you before it looks familiar somehow can it by any be the same good resolution esst you fell for last year which gave promise of carrying you through the good year 1915 holding you firmly on a permanent seat on the water cart and free from the nasty effects of king nicotine you recall with what loy you embraced said good resolution a year ago how you fell upon its neck and clung to it in your hour of distress and brunette remorse you reflect that it ought to be a good resolution because it Is made in america but wit more qt less you remember that something got wrong with it during the first inning and it permitted you to blow up with the bases full and nobody out away you mutter you are no good you tailed me once and you will do BO again then you turn your bloodshot eye both of them being that way to the dresser and you behold the necktie given you by the wife of your bosom and with a broken sob you snatch the blank from the outstretched band of good resolution and once more you are on listen it you do it and you will shut both eyes and hold on to that good resolution till the fourth of july dont look it over for it you do observe its imperfections simply exercise the tenacity of a bull pup and bold on it you last till the fourth it will be easier at least I 1 m told BO birmingham age herald f sa |