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Show Quincy, Illinois, has the latest case of Enoch Arden; but the married widow had collected the life insurance money, and a compromise will be affected on easy terms. THE greatest discovery at Pompeii is that of a woman making a fire in a cook stove while her husband is in bed and asleep. She was a noble woman. WHY is flannel like mahogany? Because it is made into drawers. A HOMELY girl has the consolation of knowing that if she lives to be forty, she'll be a pretty old gal. A WESTERN editor, wishing to speak of the prevalence of crankiness, wrote an editorial with the head, "An outburst of idiocy." A rival editor tells him the head was unnecessary. Anybody who read the editorial would see what it was. A HEN is a most inconsiderate and unaccountable creature. Now that she can lay eggs worth three cents apiece, she takes a vacation and refuses to have anything to do with the business. By and by, when chicken seed are down to 15 cents a dozen, she will put on extra ?? ?? even work nights to flood the market. The hen is no financier. A NICE looking old lady, with a snow lace about her head, sat in a car the other day, and drew up her skirts nervously, lest the cataract of tobacco juice that was pouring from the mouths of loafers should deluge them. "Conductor," she asked timidly, when he came in, "isn't it against the rules to spit on the floor of the car?" "No ma'am," replied the gallant conductor, "spit wherever you like." |