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Show Thoughts From The Garden... by Tonya LeMone "The family is one of nature's masterpieces." George Santayana I have always had this wonderful vision of family silting around the dinner table, father at the head of the table and mother, in her apron, at the other end with all the children gathered in between eating and sharing the events of the day. Even when 1 was very young, this was my dream and my hope to someday have a family that gathered at the table, had family vacations, went to church together, celebrated every holiday and birthday together. For many, this was the key clement to the American Dream. When 1 was young, this American Dream was not the case. It was very different from what I had imagined life to be like. I was adopted at the age of four after spending some time in a foster home with a dreadfully mean lady named Annie along with her mean daughters and the constant smell of greasy fried potatoes wafting through the shanty of a house. I am not even sure where I slept, but 1 did know this was an awful situation. Then my life changed overnight. A man and a woman, who were unable to have children, adopted my brother and me. I can still recall that very first day in our new beautiful home. My little brother and I were scared. He was so scared he didn't talk for several months so I spoke for him. I remember walking in to the most beautiful big house I had ever seen and taken to a room and told it was my very own bedroom. Then I was told the dresser in that very room was mine and the clothes in the dresser were also mine. I was overcome by excitement. Could my American dream be coming true? I remember the smell of the new clothes as though it were yesterday and to this day new clothing takes me back to one of the happiest days of my life. The smell of the new wood on that new dresser they had purchased just for me is as familiar a smell as the smell of the first day of Spring. It seemed I had found the dream I had always hoped for. We lived happily for many years then tragedy struck again and my parents divorced. Once again the family dream vanished as quickly as it came. My father raised me from that day on with the help of my granduother and some of the best aunties anyone could have. The summer "exchanges" took place every year between my brother and myself, but I still held on to the hope and the dream of the family I could only imagine now. I went away to college and found the man of my dreams and that family dream finally came to pass for me. We have six children and ten grandchildren, with the father at the head of the table and mother, in her apron at the other end with a plethora of children and grandchildren in between eating and discussing the events of the day. ' . . ' Because I was adopted, I have never had a birth certificate and prior to the events of 9-1 !, documents verifying ones identification was not a critical matter, so there was really little or no need for me to have a birth certificate. Because of the events of 9-1 1 and a birth certificate is required for renewal of a driver's license, I have spent the last 1 1 months and 15 days trying to acquire a birth certificate. I have sent numerous letters to vital records and county courts and phone conversations with people not really wanting to help me, let alone speak to me, only to finally tell me after a 30 minute wait on the phone there is not a birth certificate with my name at birth or my adopted name. However, I was persistent and with the help of a neighbor pushed forward with determination to find my "roots". Today was a landmark, journal worthy day. In the mail came not only my amended birth certificate with my adopted name, but my original birth certificate with my name at birth. I have always known what my first name was before being adopted, but I had no idea I even had a middle name. With this original birth certificate I now know my birth mother's name, where she was born and how old she was when she gave birth and my actual birth date. . .yes, it is . the same date. I was really hoping to be younger! I knowjny birth father's name, which I had a good idea about, but his occupation was listed as "cowhand". This has been an experience hard to explain after all these years. Too often we take for granted the simple life we have, the life without complications or confusion. The life that seems very routine and often mundane and without interruptions. I say to you try the other. You may change your mind and appreciate "from whence you came" even more. What only seemed to ever be just a dream to a little blond curly headed four-year-old turned out to be quite a "Wonderful Life". And to quote a dear friend, "It's the makings of you girl." For now, silting at the head of our table is a father and at the other end mother, in her apron, with the children in between eating and sharing ihe events of the day. See you in the Garden |