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Show what . ( bb d J1tthinkSd 1H } 1HJ1tthinkS , J1tthinkS ) 0 0t t n nabout _ about . : Middle Aee Age and painless Painie * . Denti.try Dentitry Dentistry . . CULVER ULVR ) : CITY-Especially CITY Especially CITYEspeciallyto CITY . - EspecIallyto Especially CULVER CULVR C to those ncaring nearmg nearing middle agethe agethe age agethe begin begm to ex- ex exchange exchange ex exchange - - -the the - the age when you changeyour change your your emotions for symptomsits symp symp- symptomsit's symptoms - ' to hear a aNew aNew aNew toms toms-it's toms it's its toms-its - it's its gratifying gratifymg New York scientist has hit Il1t on a aformula aformula aformula formula for really painless pam1ess den- den dentistry dentistry den dentistry - ' the operation operatJOn "m m will "monly willonly " winonly tistry . If he's hes right , only begin to hurt when you get the thebill thebill thebill bill Time was whenyou when onto ontoffPT ontoAR ontoy . " - you could lould hang ruins un- un tin- tin unZ'c tinx nn-\ nn nno - stately , AR ' - 5 y our ffPT ! : " / x , ' til t11 ill there was Engllsh English English\ English Englishivy \ ' > ' ; Z'c Zc ; . . ( " \ o . 2\ 2 \ 2t11 ' \ 1 I ivy growing on thema them themB m'ltter mltter matter m'ltterb'f matterwhat matter\ matter matterwhat ' a ; q qNowadays Nowadays No\\adays No adays \ , no b'f bf ' : $ } \ what ails mls you , , theyri they F ' ' ' / X tee teeth teethl teethlfc t h , ri riF , y yt , / t 'ii ii B SraY ray your : Y ; < fc which wluch Is a mistake tor to r ' ) y/ y yy , / y begin with , , becauser because becnns . I Inever " ncver never yet saw an anX y . r . " X 1 ray pliotograph photograph that thatwas thatwas thatwas was flattering flattcring . And the theIrvin theIrvin theIrvin Irvin S . Cobb . ne next neat .t t > . thing you know , you've youve ' i l t taste t.1ste t1ste . In your yourmonth yourmouth yourmoutb ' Rnd and Rndyour andyour andyour month mouth like Uke a druggist's druggists dishrag dlshrag ; fashIoned fashIonedbuckskin fashionedbuckskin fashionedbuckskin your face looks like an old buckskin purse , with the tbe draw drawstringcoming string stringcoming stringcoming coming undone ; and . , on the Inside Insidefeels , feels as empty as a haunted bouse house . the plate from a amall amall amall Still sun , getting upper mall order house has Its compensa compensaUons compensations compensatlons bIls bUs bIlstel's bUstern bllsters Uons tions Hot soup no longer makes mahes tel's tels tern ' In the palate . . Just a slight smell smellof smellof smellof of burning rubber-that's rubber that's thats rubber - - that's thats ' all . And a beautiful beautIfnl brilliant new set setshimmering , shimmering from a tumbler of "ater ater water "ateralongside wateralongside " wateralongside alongside the reading lamp , . certainly certainlydoes certainlydoes certainlydoes does brighten brigbten up the boudoir . * . * . s . sA A True Maker of Mclodiet Melodies . UDY gave a dinner here to the son sonof sonof sonof T HUEY THDY TUDY of desperately poor Immigrants , a amodest amodest amodest modest , kindly kindl ) little lIttIe man who star started startedlife startedlife ed edIlfe Ilfe life as a singing singmg waiter walter In a bo\\ bo boa boery bowerybar \ ery eryb'1r erybar b'1r b1r bar ' room The dinner dmner celebrated his hissilver hissilver hissilver silver jubilee jubllee as a maker mal.er maler . of melodiesIt melodies It has been just 25 23 years ye'lrs yelrs ' since he "ct ct set "ctthe setthe " setthe the toes of the nation n'ltion nltion ' to tingling tingllng with with"Alexander's with"Alexander's with"Alexander's withAlexanders "Alexander's Alexanders " ' Ragtime Ragtlme Band " I can think thinh of an occasional occaslonnl popular popularcomposer popularcomposer popularcomposer composer , \ who ho might be defined as a aperson aperson aperson person who lias h'ls hls has ' a good memory and andhopes andhopes andhopes hopes no one else has h'ls hls ' , just as now and andthenbut andthenbut andthen then-but then but - but this is a trade secret- secret secretou secret-you secret you secretyoustrike secret - voustrike ou oustrike strike a writer who is getting by not notbecause notbecause notbecause because he Is such a good writer , but butbec'luse butbecause butbecause bec'luse becluse because ' he has been such a clos closO closOreader closereader reader . But for Irving Berlin , It may be saId saIdthat saidthat saidthat that his lyrics are his Ius own and nnd his airs airsare airsare airsare are his 0\\ 0 0nand own \ \ nand and his hlS Ideas are his bls own ownMaybe ownMaybe ownMaybe Maybe that's thats tha1"5 tha15 " ' why his Ius tuneful output outputis Is so good-It good It good - it reflects refiects the spirit of nn an nnauthentIc anauthentic anauthentic authentIc creator , a genuine mInstrel mInstrelbard minstrelbard minstrelbard bard . . . . . The Great Republican Republacan Hope . NDV NEVER NDVL'R NDVLR ' n thought the stocks stocles tll'1tllcl.ed thatlicked that tll'1t tll1t thatlicked ' I INDV licked llcl.ed llcled . the desert and the Apaches Apacheswould Apacheswould Apacheswould would be slackers slacl.ers slaclers . , but neither nelther In Ari Arizona An Anzona Arlzona zona nor In New Mexico Meico " , can I find findtrace findtrace findtrace trace of an authentic Presidential boom boomfor boomfor boomfor for any Lome home grown statesman st'ltesman stltesman ' On Onthe Onthe Onthe the other hand , the sheep sbell ) crop Is re- re reported reported re reported - - ported good . Maybe It's Its ' just as well Alrea Already y there therehas therehas therehas has been more th than J.n Jn < . one fa\ fa fax favorite faonte \ onte orite son sonboom sonboom sonboom boom that reminded roe me of a new trunl\ trunl trunk trunlstore trunkstore trunkstore \ . store on a side sh stteet-you stteet you stieet eet- eet eetou - you ou know , the thehind thekind thekind hind kind that th'lt thlt ' always alwa35 opens w \ with Itb rth a grand grandclosing grandclosing grandclosing closing out saleRepublicans saleRepublicans sale saleRepublicans Republicans heie here hel e spe'llhighly speak spe'll\ spe'll spell ' \ . highly of ofGoernor ofGosernor ofGovernor Go\ernor Go ernor Gosernor \ Landon of Kansas Kans'lS KanslS ' Still , you younever ) younever OU OUnever never can tell If , vou 011 nu can C'1n C1n ' belle\ belle belles believe bellee \ e a ss \ vvliatthe h'lt hlt hat h'ltthe hatthe ' the Sunday Sunda3 II 1m pipeis IIlel hliei . ' II pr ( [ Hint mt lint when the edi edi- editors edi- edi editom editors - - tors tom can t till think tlunl III . , of my inything anything thing else , trag tragedy tragedy tragedy edy alwavs always aIwa3 s foIl followed 0\\ 0 0e \ e o\Vnln o Vnln owning \ the Hope Hopediamond hopediamond Hopediamond diamond or digging digblng Into h.in hin . King Ting Tut's Tuts Tut'stomb Tut'stomb Tut'stomb Tutstomb ' tomb But being bemg Indorsed for f01 " olh'e olhe oihce olh'eby oihceby odiceby ( ' by W . R n Hearst Hear51 Is pretty fat fatil 11 rl , too tooseems , seems to me * . * . . A New Kindof Kind of Inflation Inflation.TTTHEN InflationTTTHEN . , WIIDN IiDN one of the New Deal De.ll Dell . gioupsthe gioups gioupsTv l oups oupsthe Tv -the the - the Presidents consumers consumers'council consumerscouncil ' council-announced council announced - announced the other day d.lY dlY . thnt that thntAmericans thatAmericans thatAmericans Americans h'l\ h'l hl have h'le hale ' \ e larger largcr hips than th'ln thln ' for formerly formerly formerly merly , I just said ' . "Well Well "Nell Nell " , . 1 Im m gl'ld glld glad gl'ldthmgs gladthings gladthings ' thmgs things are expanding Tliere There were S\\ S sus Seral suseral s ( \ \ voral eral years i1 \ when hen nothing notIllng I 1 owned ownedshowed ownedshowed ownedsliowed showed a tendency to go up e except Clpt ru my mvblood blood myblood pressure , and If hips < . aie J.IC JIC ate spre spread J < . lng Ing spreadIng , , It mOl meiely merely ely means \ wider lcJer detouis detours detoUi s for fora fora fora a fellow when dancing on a clo\\dL clo dL crowded crowdedfloor ciowd.dfloor ciowddfloor \ ( . 11001 floor ' " petthe But now another White House HOl1se douse llet pet , the Works Worl.s Worls . Progress ndmlnIstrntion administration administrationgives , gh gI es n a leal thrill by promisin promising promisinJ ? to topose l c ( -\pose pose - \ ' pose spinach spln'lch splnlch ' , , pro\ pro proving proIng prosing \ Ing thel theie there e are nre plent plenty plentyof plentyof . } of vegetables veget'lbles vegetlbles ' just as ns good for the dlct Fleet . , diet.that dietthat that taste tnste like lil.e lile . something someiliing some1hln . ; and nnd not ill\.e ill.e ill .e e like ill.eSpinlCh likespinach likespinach \ . Spin-lCh Spin lCh spinach - Maybe M'1ybe M1ybe ' they 11 Il yet . } et find n a use for usefor spInach-by spInach by spinach - by applying npplylng it e\ternfillv e ternfillv e externallysay ' \ ternaliv , S'l Sl say ' . } ' ? Peisonally Pelsonally I'elsonally Ielsonally ' ' I'd Id ' r.1therear ratlier r.1ther r1ther rather . \ wear \\ear ear It in inmy Inmy Inmy my hair hmr than try to cat C'lt Clt ' It . foould , bo fo So \\ould ould should shouldyou \ wouldyou ouldyou you , reader , If youcre you \ were \\cre cre ytere only hrn\e hrn e brute hrneenough bruteenough hruveenough \ enough to come out " with "ilh ilh the truth trutb . * . . S * . SEngland's King.TN KingTN England England's Englands ' * . New King . N 'l'n ln ' Tnc THL ' matter of their IN I ruling monoarchs monarchs mon- mon mono monarchs - - - archs , the English nglish at aie e lucller lucl bud ler ter th'ln thln than th'lnsome thansome thansome ' some tainlshodnor nlshednor tamnishednor ' ' the 'lhe lhe 'the crown Is ne\ ne never neer \ er t'11 t11 tamnished ' nlshed nor the people ever slinined shnmed shamed , for nil all alltheir niltheir their kings l.ings lings . are gentlemen and nnd all nB their theirqueens theirqueens theirqueens queens are ( queens IUeens ' ' Hint's Hints 'lhnt's lhnts 'that's thats ' vvliy why . , I linewhile thlnl think ithink Ithlnl . , Britain111 Britain \ will \\111 111 I keep eep her roval roal roynl . } line . , willie while tobe we keep l.eep leep . our flag fI'lg fIlg ' . , which ou ollJht ought ht to cornmunlstic COlDwunlsUc coinmunistlc be quite a long spell . , In case cuse nny any COlD coin wunlsUc munistlc person should ask ash you ou bo ho So youbo ouho youSo , to the witty and . youngsh youngIsh en'tlglnJ entlglnJ enmging en . ? ' igin , , young Ish gentleman gentIelUlD , , . \ who ho picks UI up ) the lUHn man mnntie lUHntIe mantie tIe that slipped sUpped from Crom the tired Ured sholll shoal sliuiilders sholllclers shoalders clers ders of a n kindly Idndly and eldeilygentleman eldellygentJemnn eldellgentleman gracious gr'll1olls grll1olls graeious ' eldelly eldell Y gentJemnn gentleman , , we over here bere bestwishes stwlshe offerY offerwishes ofYcr olTer offer our 11 < > st wlshe wishes we 1Ve . know 1.now 1now in.variably invariably Insariably . * Your Majesty M'Jesty MJesty hje ' ty In In- In . - arlably sariably \ \ will wI11 III show andwhilst andwhlist good tu tuste taste te , . Qlld and \itthinj-that itthinj that rlitthinjthat rlhtthlnthnt htthinthat .hllst hllst whlist , . . , } iou you ou may nmy not always ah\us ah us alstays \ ) do the time rl ri rlht . : ' \ ht I rlhtI thln-thnt thln thnt thin-that thin that muchof muchof mUlhof , . ; - would be acl.ln aclln asking ; . . ; too much much mUlh of nny any lUnn-we lUnn we man-We man man-were man were - re dead sure 11 II . you al al.vvav alvvav I mUlhI ways \ a 'i i ' < } say It . IRVIN S COBB C0Ba . e North Nerth American .ric ric . . NewsPIlPor Newspapor p , Alliance . , . lul lulWNU IuWNU Iu -WNU WNU - f > orvl borvaee . |