Show t Henry Mclemore NEW YORK YORK Partly Partly because yeas as s beginning to resemble a av av seat badly In need of re- re v v airs and and artly aTtly beu be be- fus fusI u e I 1 want- want j I t to prepare ys lf for ny belt ny j I g h t e n- n Bg ng that fight leht come comer rough ugh a r curial ra- ra t of Jodi od I have a en enon en on et etor for the ast i f few fewa A e AV V v a ays called lUlls more h b Eight Eight- Ja v Wonder diet and denves derives its Mn the fact that long bere bere heMn be- be ire re the e. e eight days are up the eter begins to wonder how the laws against can- can and if tf he can keep al uland and body together until the ini Is finished and he can teeth into something ore substantial than a glass of tamed water Certainly the man or woman 10 ID survives the Eight-Day Eight onder diet and and the betting on ono c o is no better than even money wont won't w- w wont won't be frightened by bye e sugarless cereals cereal- cereal s days that Mr is inking of imposing The sectary sec sec- tary tart of agriculture can come and advocate a foods food- food Vday s d day y without alarming those io I 16 have experienced the menus provided on this particular re reducing reducing reducing re- re bill of fare It might b be a good thing If all Americans dieted for a week or two The diet teaches conservation Dieters dont don't waste any of their food My breakfast this morning morning morning morn morn- ing consisted chiefly of a slice of rye toast about the size of an air mail stamp and when my wife was removing it from the toaster she accidentally left a thumbprInt on its surface You cant can't imagine how how good that thumbprint tasted tast tast- ed so ed-so so good and substantial Baked into the porcelain of my dh diviner dinner ner plate is a little fish Ive I've been after that little perch or whatever it is for a solid three days I believe If I can get him Ill I'll be he able to last the eight days Dieting also teaches the appreciation appreciation ap ap- of food Americans are inclined to take too much for granted the bountiful food that pours onto their tables from the Star Star Spangled Spangled Horn of Plenty Three or four days on this Eight-Day Eight Wonder diet and anda a man holds a bite of carrot in his mouth until it melts and rolls a bit of stewed celery on his tongue as though It were breast of auk under liberty bellor bell bellor bellor or a ragout of Eskimo pie a la lamode mode The simplest dishes take on a new light and even such sucha a homely concoction as stewed tomatoes makes the mouth water water water wa wa- ter from 20 paces A diet makes you mean too and Americans could use a lit lit- tie tle more meanness these days I I what with having to deal with such outlaws as the Japs and Germans But to get back to the exer exer- You start them the same time you do the diet One of them calls for you to stand against the wall and heels against th the a baseboard go through the motions of a Boy Scout standing on hot coals wig wagging to his troop master across the lake for help This Is all right the first day when the two-pound two steak you ate the night before you started on the diet is SS still in there pitching but by the third day you are too weak to do any more than barely barely barely bare bare- ly wiggle your fingers and you hope the will come across the lake and help you Another set of exercises calls for you to stretch out on your back in bed and pretend you arc are riding a bicycle This isn't easy to do A mans man's common sense revolts at this exercise No one ever rode a bicycle flat on his back not even the trick guys in vaudeville Too the exercise never calls for any coasting My sty physician chose a course cours that is always uphill Not once do the directions say Okeh now that youve you've reached the top of the mountain you can coast for a mile or two This is my fifth day on the diet I dont don't look like a love seat any more My ribs cry out for a xylophonist to beat a tune tunc on them My chin cries for its lost brothers |