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Show BECOMING A GOOD LISTENER He's gay, he's debonair, he's popular, he's sought after for his wit and charm. Among his friends are many attractive young women. Tho other day he was telling me about how he evaluates the personalities person-alities in deciding whether to continue con-tinue their friendship or not, tor he is a critical judge of personality and apparently is a man who is hard to please. My friend says that the one quality qual-ity he looks for, the great quality of attractiveness in a human being, is simply that of showing interest in the other person and in what he is saying. "Whenever I take a young woman out to dinner for the first time," he explained, "I begin talking. She doesn't know it, but I am giving her a personality test. "I tell her of some experience of mine. 1 don't talk about things I'm sure would bore her, but I try to make one of my experiences interesting inter-esting to her. I say something like this: I had an interesting weekend a couple of weeks ago. 8ome amazing things happened to me. It was really funny-' And then I interrupt myself Is that draft bothering you? Ill ask " "Then what's the next step?" I asked him. Why I wait to see if she 11 ask what happened to me on my trip or whether she will forget it and talk about something else." Most of them ask you to go on, don't they?" They do not. That's Just the trouble That's why I say that the average man or woman misses a fine opportunity to develop lasting and interesting friendships by not taking a deeper interest in the other person and in what he is saying. I think that this man has hit upon one of the most vital subjects in the Whole field of improving your Mean Me-an expressed interest, a sustained Merest, a lively interest in the other person. you develop that, though you may have none of the other attributes attri-butes of charm or appearance, you Will have a priceless aid in becom-ing becom-ing more popular. And if you want to see how few ople actually have developed it, ve those with whom you are Sxrown intc contact the lonelily test that this man described to me-talk to a person about your-lf your-lf a UtUe while, then interrupt Probably six out of ten won ask you to g.t back on the subject ' I'U wager that the four out of ten who do are the one. you Luce and respect the most. |