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Show BAN WAS A BUSHER. 'Daniel in the Lion's I)cn Whs a Incliv guy ! ' ' Tims the baseball ' writer spoke With a heavy sigh. l'r;iniel in the Lion's Den Was a luekv slob! ' Thus the baselmll writer spoke With a weary sob. "Daniel in the Lion's Den Was a luck v ieek ! ' J Thus the baseball writer spoke, Tears upon his cheek. "Daniel in the Lion's Den Was a lucky hound ! ' ' Thus the baseball writer spoke, Spreading tears arouna.j "Daniel in thi T ion 's Den, i Oil! the lueky eliunip! ; Never traveled with a team Jn a batting slump. " We have seen card sharps in our time, but we never have seen a man who could shuffle a batting order as fast as Clarence Rowland. A few soothing words to "Fielder .Tones: Three weeks ago Juhn Mc-G Mc-G raw's team was the joke of the National Na-tional league. Nobody in the league can see the joke today but John AIc-G AIc-G raw. -I- Humid Kail a Pasha breezed into the , office, looking for information. ( What's , the name of this hick town where 1 White and Welsh are going to put on their stuff f" he asked. ' "Buonos Aires, you mean?" "Yes, that's the plaue; Buenos Aires. " "Are yon figuring on perpetrating some wrestling there?'' ' ' No, but I was just wondering if they were going to run a special train up there.'1 SIGNS. I know that summertime has come, Though frigid is the air. On every fence that meets my eye There is a large and active giiy ' In porous underwear. Owing to trie recent climb of the Giants, various scribes have been led to'remark that John McGraw has a ball team. This is a grievous mistake. The ball team has John McGraw. THE PEACE ADVOCATE. He wept and said; "It grieves me sore To see men shed their, ruddy gore And lose their arms and ears and feet And suffer under snow and sleet, Or perish on tho sprouting grass Beneath a cloud of poison gas. Tt grieves me sore to see men die Who love their lives as well as I. I wish this cruel war would cease J am for peace! I am for peace I" To ease the anguish in his frame He went to see a baseball game, And, ere an hour had passed, he sped A bottle at the umpire's head. He wore' a spring suit, a straw hat and low shoes. Over his left arm he carried a winter overcoat, and in his right mitt he bore a gripsack containing contain-ing a fur cap, a pair of earmuffs a sweater, a pair of rubber boots and a footwarmer. "I believe in preparedness," prepared-ness," he said. "I am going to attend a ball game. ? 3 In spite of the prevailing impression, there are at least half a dozen pugilists who hu're not been suspended bv the Wisconsin boxing commish. Heine Zim has been appointed field captain of the Cubs, showing that a 1 massive brain is a valuable asset in baseball. GREAT GAME! There lived a man in our town Who drove a racing car. He is not with us any more, But several orphans are. We fail to understand whv thev still call -em Dodgers. Thev seem to have everybody else doing the dodging act these days. The report that Freddie Welsh intends in-tends to visit South Africa is no surprise sur-prise to fight promoters. He afwavs goes south with the gate receipts. |