OCR Text |
Show J,, murdering the IM V illli and happl- Ejy MNI1 Hm? mi HTp with who hrtvr nothing I ; r' 'rl"" f. la lifetime to j HI I tff , T til - ' .' "' 17 "ul" s (J , ;riw "m th" whit" siifii ; 9 r.'icf. H" '" xl '" "'" a ; v " ' : Narrative of ke Mutt PicnicTkat Butted in on a Wortky Seaaptan" I homes of the rkh. standing bark In the woods, dot tin hori for miles Small pagoda-like shelters lino the beach in front of the., hoihea The linmbl" cottager, cot-tager, like m s.-lf. . welcome H on a pc-i-green I., im h ir- .' ..f , h.irg. and rest hi hands and foot it does the ilslit kind of )i fellow KOI d I" know there Im money at hi bark, -.von If the coin doesn I belong to him Hut once In a while :i progressive spirit, who .)'.,. not -. -i,, I Im r- ti pnrtv. bulges Into our midst; then the Dnlngg arc different. For instance, the seafaring ii"a oropa out, usuallj In the brain pan of nnn who never saw t h sea or dreamed of Its capacity for twisting the programme pro-gramme sun. a bounding billow picnic looks and sounds well before the mooring lines nrf cast ft One morning at hrak of day an asthmatic asth-matic tugboat coughed her way Into the Qulf fr"m Dope Springe She carried several sev-eral quarters ot unappetising beef clad In gunny packs, a bunch of Swede dph captains, more or lens soused, and fourteen four-teen mutts, both male and female. A rnntt is a person who has no well-defined Idea of where he or sh Is khick or why Such was our personnel. The beef was for the lumber, xhlps anchored an-chored at Boat Island, twenty miles out. The Swede captains belonged to these Ships, and the fourteen m tit Ik of assorted sexes wero the component parts of a vague, uncertain picnic. Most picnics arc-that arc-that way fretful humans In tight shoes, filling bogs and fibs of sticky fund and wandering about looking for a place to stop find eat That la a graphic pen picture pic-ture of a picnic. Well, the tUg captain saw ua first, and the ret wns easy For $1 per head he would freight our ph-nlc to Boat Island and hack, and show us a good time on the hlllow. Not one of the mutta was from Missouri, h'-ni i the tugman was not as. , amlm d on what he had to show. what's the use? Hi Jusi loaded up his H4 worth of mutts and put out to sea. Bomi people are not ashamed to take the! m v im the smj to the island the iadie pre-ferred pre-ferred prostrated si lis In the dinky cab-In. cab-In. while the gentlemen clung together In pallid bunches on deck and gazed straight up Into the sky .Thi-f- is less motion in oelfit Home." He Said, With an Air of Confidence Inspired II by the Plug Hat and the Passionate Socks. that direction. We had plenty of victual. I but no one cared for the continuous, and, I t.evtdri, th. cook w.if bnlllni; a nmst dl- eolute cabbage, lie sot n- part or the $h passape money, vet the cook did all he, could I., 10 trip a SUCCeSS, Some pea cooks will po ..tit of their wav to ln-fllCt ln-fllCt favon on land lubbers. Like similar Institutions, Boat Island Is surrounded by water "deep enough to float vessels waliinR for lumber cargo from the main shore. The Island Itself was a flat hatch of cheap Fand nothing on It In the way of vegetation aid no place to I land a picnic. When we re-iched the spot 1 I the deep-sea outing seemed to lag. Much ol the enthusiasm ami other tiiins' hud evaporated and blended with the sad salt waves The fourteen mutts viewed the prospects with a low grade of esteem. "What shall we do n.-xt?' 'the boss mutt lnqulr. d "Anything you like. ' replied the tug captain "The lid Is off here " To prove his words, the captain removed re-moved the forward hatch and hoisted a clammy quarter of beef to the deck of a tall ehip. At the next vessel he discharged dis-charged one soused Swede, and then played the beef game alongside a three-masted three-masted schooner. :'I never saw anything like this at Cres-toti, Cres-toti, la.," said a thin young lady, who hail studied elocution. "Oh, why didn't we stay at the hotel and play ping-pong ping-pong In Justice to tho elocutionist, she had organized th picnic, collected the mutts, prescribe l t)K- lulu h .mil discovered the connection between the tug and Boat Island. No one had a better right to kick We looked for her to .-mil the tlrst ble ii "It mlcht be worse." said the artist, taking ta-king ia snapshot at an Iron ship with scrofulous sldea. It hasn't rained any yet." Meanwhile, the tugman kept right on hurling Sw d.- captains and bc.-r at ships In need of sjich luxuries, and sweating at I both In a st.l- entirely hU own The lid i waa off, all right. Every now and then the tug stood on Its hind legs, thus giving th. picnic a more accurate glimpse Of the moving pictures. The entire series wasn't worth a dollar, of my money, at least; ' but I was up againal It. and couldn't g-t away. At length we paused beside a I soiled wooden ship swinging at anchor A gangway ran diagonally down the side of the ship and ended In a grated platform close to the wat. r "Here i where you all Kit off." said the tubman. "Pile out lively! e piled out with the fried chicken, doughnuts dill pickles and pie. "I'll com.- back for you all at 3 o'clock sang out the tug captain, steaming away toward the main fleet. He still had some beef and soused skippers to disburse to their rightful owners. The fourteen mutts huddled on tin gratnl platform through which the damp sea water squirted at each downward roil Of the vessel, ll reminded me of a patent pat-ent dishwashing machine, only the wa ter wn cold. Ever and anon the gentlemen gentle-men cussed In subdued accents The ladies gazed along the steeo Incline of the ladder and monkeyed with their skirts It was nulto embarrassing. Suppoai crew of fourteen insanitary sailors were to be dumped on the f:ont stoop of a private pri-vate mansion ashore, what would be th.-answer? th.-answer? Cops and the wagon and cracked 1 skulls, maybe While we waited for th- ropes to he cut. dropping th whole picnic into the sea. a round, red face hung Itself over 1 he side of the shin "Come on up." growled the face. We climbed th. ladd. r and tiled about. 1 the spa. tons after deck. The ow im i Of the round red face, the I only one In sight, had retreated behind I the companion hatch, lie was a middle-aged middle-aged fat mariner In a fifty-cent undershirt, under-shirt, drooplnjr trousers and slippers without with-out socks. He looked at the ladles and blushed. "Hope you'll excuse me. lldn t expect company." Intense cordiality and a hard sjilrt. with a With that he made swift dive down the companion, leasing the picnic esus-psnded esus-psnded In midair, so to speak. "Somebody should apologize for this Intrusion In-trusion when he returns." said the elocutionist elo-cutionist from Creston, Ia. "I will If he doesn't begin shooting too soon." replied th" boss mutt. "He's Justified.'" Jus-tified.'" In a remarkably short time the sk'pper popped out of the cabin arrayed In a plug hat and brlillant red socks The fifty-cent undershirt and dejected trousers trous-ers remained as they were "Make yourselves at horn.-," he said with an air of confidence inspired by the plug hat and the passionate socks. "The cook Is ashore, drunk, or I'd get you up a dinner. Excuse me, please." "Great Scott!" said tho boss mutt, who was the social leader of the winter colony. ' The owner of this ehlp Is apologising because be-cause we buttd In on lilm. Can you beat that?" Seemed like the captain was trying to I square hlm.-elf, for he again bu'ge I out of I the cabin. This time he wore a smile of , row of lnundrv diamonds down the front j I -those little black studs thai hold the bosom In place All hlgh-i lass laundries insert the diamonds without extra charge. "It's pretty dull out here.' c,.ld the , captain, bestowing a fond glance on the laundry diamonds, "but 1 guess you can ' stand the pace couple or hours. I've I been here three months awaiting lumber cargo for South America. Just excuse me, will you?" The cabin stairs gave off a squeaking sound when the skipper again emerged. Tan shoes did it The sloppy slippers had gone hy the hoard. On the level, that ! man was tickled to death over the sur- i prise party and was dressing up by de-gn de-gn i breaking himself to us gently. Under Un-der "tie arm he carried a lump of mould, blue plu-n with tarnished brass clasps on It I "Perhaps the ladle would like to look ! nt the pictures," he said, pushing the al bum out at random. "That's my wife and I the girls both twins. They're nil In Boston. Bos-ton. Haven't seen 'cm for a year. I've I got to go below now, so excuse me." I looked for a gold-headrcl carte and spats this trip, but the captain fooled me. It was pants of the best I" trouserings extant delicate stripes of black and white that set off the tan shoes, laundry diamonds and plug hat lie was the hap-plesl hap-plesl mortal afloat on any sea. "Quarter deck here is the piac to eat your lunch.' he sold, sensing Ml. p.-kl- and doughnuts with rar picnic instinct "Fine nir and scenery. I'll spread an awning. Bust that cook! He 6hou'.d b aboard when I've got company Ladles ll nt, too. Think of It !" Unable to properly think of It in the open, our genial h"t. after spreading the awning took another header below, and came up In a short alpaca coat that greatly enhanced his seafaring beauty He brought two hug conical tins of pineapple pine-apple put up In Brazil 'They're line, them pineapples," he said, "and I want to treat the ladles. Did Intend sending 'em home, but I'll get r.me more next trip. Great place, Brazil Jilgxest snakes nnd pineapples in the vs nrld Being drpsesd within an Inch of hl life tlie i nptaln sat down on a signal lot ki r and beamed upon the picnic. He felt equal to the great occasion, having ntet the arduous requirements of host on shri notice. Perhaps It Jarred him some to know he had not paid for the tug that Clung Together in Pallid F.unches on Deck. dumped fourteen mutts on his gangwa Do you loe the sea''' asked the Ores-ten. Ores-ten. Ia . young lady while the rating i was being promulgated "Yes. when it doesn't tare up and hit j me m the back." "Does that often happen?" "Only once In nr. c.iev-." Maid the cap- tain, with a mood Sttlill "I didn't xlv H mother chance. That slap In the back was an episode, and I'll tell you how it was When 1 first went tO s. a a a boy mother placed a Bible In my chest. I promised her I d read the good book reg- ular. But three years had passed away before i .t thought ..f it One mild Sunday afternoon, In the Indian ocean, I got to thinking of mother and home. You . know how It is wllh rorrs; the think proper .sometimes. Well, I took out th 1 book and mi down lit th waist -that low place on deck between the forward and . ' after houses There w-as a quartering sea I and a light br. eZe that m nt the little brig- along easy iik-"Bj iik-"Bj chance i opened at the tot of the BXOduS, and was reading about th" I children of Israel fleeing from the wicked hosts of Pharaoh it was mighty Inter- i I eating where tv- Red ses opened a dry I path and let the children pass through. I followed them along and was Just ahead of the Egyptians when the waters came ' together and swamped the who!, armv. Just tlnn .. hlg w,i. tolled over the brie from astern and washed me .md the book plumb into the how. I was burled tinier two feet of water, ;nid when I got mv mouth out I veiled S.i me, too M ses!' I For a minute I thought really was crossing the Red sea and had fallen behind be-hind the procession." 'And is that a true story?" th elocu- tJonist inquired when we all woke up. True as gospel, and it's no miracle, either. Sometimes the regular heave of the ocean becomes broken Two or three. small waves roll Into one and travel mlle intll they hit something and bust. That. ne T'm telling you about hit me and roke Up my Bible reading." At this point in the skif.pet ? classic recital re-cital the tug wheeZ,d alongside and it was time to go. In the scramble down I the ladder the visiting mutts forgot their 1 genial host Not until the tag swung 1 dear of the ship did he merge into view for the ln t time He si 1 on the rail WSVlng farewell with one hand and buttoning but-toning on a celluloid collar with the oth r. while the slanting rays of a winter sun Illumined ills gorgeous g&rb. After all. the picnic wasn't no bail. Ohly the Iowa elocutionist would keep I looking bar k. I think she expected ono of those large waves to come along and ! hit her n the shirt waist. Weird talcs of the sea arc likely to impress young 1 lady elocutionists |