Show c MODERN 1 c FABLES By George Ade of U Tables in Slang ng ngA A The Modern Fable of Cyril the Who Got ills is Wish and asid id Met MetS One After the Show NCE upon a Time there was wasa a ft Tender render Boy who was ONCE O half way a between h ker and the University Glee Club His HiB Hi name was wan waS rn and his bI Folks lived I t 1 fir lir t Stone Castle CatIe Ca tle at the right II I Eusy Ety Street vernor was a tv d r i i u ho had an office in Ute tie Street t i l f r to Tickers and Blackboards The Governor Gornor hall I l I j 1 Things J i i t tn th Mat and been through the thes th J I s UK IId d taken the Count several lut but he was wa Game and would not net noti netI t i iJ J i umi his share of the Loot By Byi I If t f ill iI i j i ii was old enough to smoke 1 nn m Cigarettes garettes getting cZ 1 Governor had so Y that he could use it for Riling is f rL fL Pill ws and amI washing Windows T i rU a t yung Yun Man habit of buy buyne fr 10 ne Meal Ie Checks for I 1 seem f f m that Cyril sh ild have haye I 1 t 1 1 pry rv rY happy hippy The n House Bou e was full fulle e n into who ried to anticipate his t Wish I h He had Cameras and andi i J PP ni fl a gam Canopy over er his L Ii iJ J and more than a irese rom of ot l rf He had obedient tutors to tot 1 t I tP the House Hou e and try to to rump pump J 1 Mt lr d into him any I ill s Jan i i If he complained of or a n head eol Ii t r 1 was as Peevish at itt the Breakfast Ins his hi Mamma knew kne there must be ben n thing wrong with the City Air Mr so soi o fh i w ud take him him under her Wing r I v I L i J I J t I It Ih t I II h Cyrie and away they ther would so go to the it dacks or the Sea Shore or Europe Cyril had been to Europe twice and to prove that he wasa Bright Boy he could tell the name of the Ship they had come comeback comeback comeback back on and he be knew k that the Hotel in Paris be bezan an n with an It n Although the Earth and a d the he Fullness thereof were w re laid In front of Cyril and although Papa applied the Squeeze e to the Little Fish every Day or two to get more funds with which to buy Tutors and Automobiles for him the Boy was not Happy He had no end of Trouble As an Example Sometimes he would work for an Hour to get his ed Ties just right so the Ends would woula I Balance and if he could not do it he be hew w would feel Moody and Discouraged ed and the tears would come to his Eyes and he would think that the th Fates had con conspired conspired conspired to lay my Tribulation on his Young Or he be would tut Dut on a nair nail of Pas Passionate Passionate Hose with the th stripes up and down and he would go out with his Trousers reefed up Ul so that all might see and ind he would meet another Boy BOj whose Socks were Checked ard he would wonder If it Perpendicular had ceased to be the Thing Th ng The Clouds would gather over him with not a Rift fun to let et the Sunshine through h and he would regret that he had hod been Born orn Perchance he would see on the tiie Drive a new llew style of Cart several l higher I than any of his and he would bite his nails and t d tOol feol 01 sure that Che t e other Boys were trying Jo Humiliate him And Arid ha 12 h hail more than his share of Grief and Disappointment when it came caine to selecting Hat Bands or Snaking the Tailor get the proper Bell Ben Effect on his Coats Couts so that they would uld out all the Way Vay around I However the One and Consuming Sorrow of oC his hi Young Life was that he had never neli met a a Real Actress He lie had purchased od their Photographs and he had even gone so 1110 far as to t send end Flow Flowers Flowers Flowers ers hut he had never actually Met ret one so 50 as to have her Speak to him That was what he wanted One of his hi S friends named Paul had ridden on a Train once with a Company playing A Runaway Girl and had opened a window for tor Virginia Earle who had thanked him bim with Her own lips Ups Consequently Paul was the genuine It when hen the boys got bot ik 1 I y yI i I j i Hortense together r In C Den to look at the Pictures and talk about which one they liked Best Cyril C ril dreamed one Night that he had Lillian Russell Rusell riding with him in his Stanhope St and that Edna Wallace Hopper Hop Hopper per and Madge Lessing stood tood on the Corner and threw Violets at them as they rode r de past and that all aU the other Boys were shriveled with rith ith Envy EJ When I he A he was so Blue he had a no notion nolion non lion to leave Home and go on the Stage just so that he could be near them But Everything Comes to him hUn who is ison ison ison I on the Lookout Cyril became ac at acquainted acquainted with the Treasurer of the Theatre at A which Hortense Effingham I Iw was w appearing in The Cash Girl ant antone one Day Da the Treasurer happened to ask Cyril If he would like to drop in at Miss I Apartments some Night i after the Performance Cyril almost Fainted with Joy and told the I Ito to name a Night The Treasurer Treo said he would uld speak to Miss Effingham Cyril C il did not touch the Ground at all aU when he went home that Day DR He had seen Hortense on the Stage many manya a time She was a vivacious lit little little littie tle tie Blonde just as saucy and s as she could be All the Fellows had her Picture And he was going gooing to Sup with her after the Show He H wondered what Paul would say to that The Night Ni ht was Set Se Cyril dI dar to let his parents I know of the Racket 1 so o be pe I IsaId said he was going to a Party He touched his Father F tb r and Mother and the I Money l me and emptied his iS Sayings Bank and got together In Incase inease i case ease they Uie to l send out for far fori more Champagne and ar an Cigarettes He knew It was going tobe to a Wild Revel for he had heard d the th Stories Stori In his limited Experience nce he had learned that the Nicest Families often oft n break Glassware and do the Cake Walk when they get together r after the The Theatre Theatre Theatre I atre and he figured d that if the respect respectable respectable respectable able Society People went 3 far hr as that I then the gay Professionals would probably probably probably ably turn turn over the Piano I and ana use an Axe on the Furniture He was wo in for br a Perfect Tear m bt b he knew kne W he would have h ve to see it through so he I could Tell about it afterward On the Appointed Evening he wore Full Dress because in Jn all the pictures Men about Town Yn taking Late Sup Suppers Suppers pers with Footlight Favorites he had noticed that the Coat went That Evening he was In Front at atthe atthe atthe the Theatre and as he v Hor Hortense Hortense tense flit and tauter and anil I w b j Miller win the Plaudits of the he discriminating metropolitan Audience he kept thinking to himself Little do these People sit sitting sitting sitting ting me suspect that I am going to take SUpper with her It seemed almost too Good GooC to be True Cyril C rn and anti the of the House had to walk around for a while after the Show to give Hortense time to get getoff getoff getoff off her MakeUp and arrive at the Flat Then they went up and when they rang the Bell Cyril could hear his Heart Heartbeat Heartbeat Heartbeat beat He expected to hW hava his hat kicked off just as he stepped in but buthe buthe buthe he propose to Let On They were welcomed by a pleasant sant little Woman with Dark Hair Cyril caught the name as Mrs Miller She said sald her Husband would be out in a Minute After she went away aw y the Friend explained to Cyril C l that Effing ham liam was her Stage Name and then Cyril began to understand that Mrs Miller was Hortense and that the Wig makes a Difference She came back with Mr lIr Miller whom Cyril recognized as the Leader of the Orchestra Also there was wag a s Tall TaM Boy of about CyrUs Age Mrs Miller said it was her Son who was home on a Vacation She hoped that he and Cyril would be Great Friends Mrs Miller told Cyril she knew his Father quite well ell as he had handled several Investments for her She said he was a Lovely Man Then she he asked Cyril which he liked better Hall Caine Came or Marie Corelli and he said he thought both of them were all right He was lucky to be able to say th that U much He know whether he was ivah was On Foot or Horseback After that they Y had bad a little Lunch of Crackers and nice rich Milk Cyril Cyrila was t tI only one present who w wore ore Evening EV ing Clothes Mrs Millers Son Sei So showed Cyril r ll his Book of Kodak Pictures and anti they had hada a little Music and then it was as Time TilDe to h togo togo go SO Home Mrs 1118 Miller Miner asked Cyril if i ibe he be had Car Fare and he told her he had He still sUll had 18 1 He went home feeling Puzzled but Respectable He was fULL fall of Milk MORAL Dont believe all 11 you Hear Copyright 1869 I by Robert Bobert Howard How Rue RUB RUBell ell |