Show MARK TWAIN ON WARTS The Warts Wero on Him Once Ho Tells Row to Remove Them Mark Twain has written to Tho New York Sun as Hows I find the following suggestive derelict wandering about the ocean of journalism Id give a thousand dollars said a well to do Now Yorker the other day to have that mark removed and he held out a well shaped and well cared for hand on the back of which between the thumb and first finger was tattooed tat-tooed a big blue anchor When I was a little fool at school with my head full of I stories of adventure my highest ambition was to go to sea An old sailor who lived in tho village tattooed about a dozen of us on tha sly and I remember the lies I told my mother as I kept my hand done up in a rag pretending I had cut ittill the sore healed Then sha gave me such a thrashing as broke up my plan fortunately to have n fine red and blue heart done on the back of the other The disfigurement has caused me no end of annoyance since and has cost mo considerable money for gloves which I always wear winter win-ter and summer though I detest them in warm weather But a man cant wear gloves at the table and often at restaurants I catch people staring at my hand and I wonder won-der if they think I havo served my term in the focastla of some oyster scow or lumber schooner A tattoo mark is easily removed May I drop into personal history I When I was a small boy I had my share of warts I tries in turn the threw hundred and sixtyeight ways of removing them but without results indeed I seemed to get wartier and wartier right along But at last somebody repealed to me the three hundred and sixtyninth way and I tried it Thus I drove a needle down into the basement of the wart then held the other end of the needle in tho amen ame-n 01 a candle some stile time ceo needle 0o i cams red hot throughout its length and pro 1 reeled to cook the wart Presently I drew I bo needle out if it had white atoms like nits liukizijj about its point that wart was done if the point was clear I drovo it in again and cooked till I got those white things They rtcro the roots of the wart Twentyfour hours later the wart would become soft and flabby and I removed it with a single wipe of my hand Where it had been was a smooth surface now which quickly healed and left no scar Within two days I was wartless and have so remained unto this day Well a long time afterward when I was 10 years old a sailor tattooed an anchor and ropo on the back of my left hand with India ink The color was a deep dark blue and extravagantly conspicuous I was proud of it for awhile but by the time I had worn it nine years I was tired of it and ashamed of it I could find nobody who could tell mo how to get rid of it but at last my wart experience ex-perience of near half a generation before occurred oc-curred to me and I got me several needles and a candle straightway I drove the needles nee-dles along just under tho surface of tho skin and tolerably close together and made them include the whole tattoo mark then I fired up on them and cooked that device thoroughly thor-oughly Next day I wiped the device off with my hand The place quickly healed and left no scar A faint bluish tinge remained and I was minded to begin again and cook that out but as it was hardly detectable and not noticeable notice-able it did not seem worth the fuel and so I left it there and there it is yet though I suppose sup-pose I am the only member of my tribe that knows it I was in London a good many years ago when tho Tichborne claimants case was being tried and a batch of learned experts testified testi-fied that an India ink tattoo mark could not be removed but I was not asked to testify and so those people dont know any better to this day Let tho well to do New Yorker fetch me some needles and a candle and name his bet I will take him up |