Show i Jd r X J f y 11 Y s 's 4 i i j f t. t 1 tit ivl i 1 i. i oC S' S i t j. j J i. i 0 4 A fl L' L J r AX I I A Novel Nove I One OneAcE AcL or r i 11 lj comedy by jv 1 d t iT Persons r. r in In the 1 PI Play ay Dorothy Shelton Contemplating Elopement Y Billy Shelton Her Husband and Jerry Carruthers Billy s Pal Pall Shelton Home Home Home- l S Scene cne Living Room l in n the Copyright by bV the Author r As A the curtain rf rises s and Carruthers arc are discovered discovered dis dis- social butterfly of 01 some covered a not flOt unattractive thirty five years lears of 01 age has inherited wealth and having never had Irad to concern conc t himself t. with p pa productive labor has lias acquired a fine dilettantism an ability to do many things thins badly without doing any anyone one of 01 them t so 0 badly that It becomes evident he has neglected it ft Carruthers his Ids friend has lias even CLen less claim to distinction dis They would woul pass f in a crowd crowd il If the crowd were large enough but no one with the possible exception of 01 a a Society Editor would give either cither of 01 them a second glance Were one to seek something visibly com commendable about them one might rc re 1 mark nar that they arc alc groomed an and tailored to an art exquisite nicety nicety- too exquisite perhaps They arc in full lull dress for lor they have just finished the evening meal and as the assiduous butler lights their cigars places the thc liqueur tray on Ora the table an and discreetly effaces l himself they slowly push their chairs into more comfortable comfort able pO positrons positions and aud look 1001 at each other There is something in that look looT something unusual an and the shadow of a smile curls about the husbands husband's lips lip as at he raises his hb arm to consult a wrist forist tea watch tell What ARRUTHERS-What What time C CARRUTHERS SHELTON SHELTO Twelve SHELTON T Twelve e cl minutes of or eight eIght no no ten minutes or ot My I watch is a little slow I CARRUTHERS rather brilliantly after a pause Thought pause Thought It It was later than that y SHELTON So So did I. I Consulting the watch again Its It's eleven en minutes of of that oC-that that is to sa say nine minutes of ot no now He pauses pause's and smiles reflectively Jerry Yes CARRUTHERS Yes SHELTON I I wonder what Cheevers Cheever's saying to her no now CARRUTHERS I I wonder SHELTON examining a time table Their table Their train pulls out at eight t. t CARRUTHERS with a trace of 01 animation I animation I thought you said were they leaving lea this afternoon SHELTON SHELTON SHELTON-Oh Oh yes But Dut she had to do some shopping You cant can't get any decent clothes in Chicago you know He Hc chuckles slowly I suppose she wanted the satisfaction of ot charging a final bill to me eh Jerry CARRUTHERS nodding sympathetically Its Its It's Its It's cost you a pretty penny penn all in all SHELTON philosophically Well philosophically Well your wife doesn't elope with some other chap cYC every da day does docs sho aho CARRUTH CARRUTHERS RS undecidedly Er Er no This SHELTON SHELTON SHELTO This is a special occasion If Dorothy Doroth feels she has hasa a rl right ht to to car carte e blanche on her last day as my my wife I dont don't know v b but t what hat I ought to agree agree- with her Its It's sentimental you ou kno know But CARRUTHERS-But But RS-But But expensive e SHELTON SHELTON Sentiment Sentiment is always alwa's expensive e At any rate Im I'm footing the th bills A little more or less doesn't matt matter r. r He rises and produces produce a mass mats of oJ pape papery papers 3 from a convenient desk Just look at these CARRUTHERS What CARRUTHERS-What What are they they- SHELTON The SHELTON The detectives detectives' reports He le thumbs them over Oler with felth 3 smile Its It's been like a continued our next in our next story Ive I've been beell reading them for lor the last month CARRUTHERS surprised I I didn't know you had detectives following her SHELTON Well hesitantly Well I couldn't ask her It If she was going to run away CARRUTHERS Vh Why Why not SHELTON SHELTON-She's She's too good a a. woman to lie to me and me-and and I didn't want to embarrass her Carruthers smiles smile cynically Shelton Shelton Shelton Shel Shel- ton crushes him hint politely You wouldn't understand such things anyhow Jerry He bundles the thc reports together again The last Installment reached ma ma to to day It took her lier a month to make malee up her mind Cheever er wanted her to elope long ago but she wouldn't hear of or it She had scruples And t morrow to-morrow morrow CARRUTHERS thinking lie lLe is b rising to the situation To situation To-mor To Tomorrows Tomorrow's morrows morrow's mor- mor rows row's another day da SHELTON with a f faint int frown frown No Ko To-morrow To Ill I'll be a 0 free freeman man man no no wife no responsibilities s no conscience Rather clever of ot me eh oh Jerry If It I had told her I didn't mind sho never neer would hava bava run off ort Never Ne CARRUTHERS CARRUTHERS Suo's She's a a. moral woman your wife SHELTON SHELTO N Nodding emphatically c rather Corr t lInn ih a I D nn o n 1 k I T not n. n 6 L u u y J U Sou J A. l now A I m ILA iU nul sure bun U O that LU HAdU OUt sho fan t I running Uli off Olf with Cheever Chee because she wan wants t to reform him Hes He's a bad lot you know gambles and drinks and a n devil with the N ladles ladies CARRUTHERS Im I'm slowly Im I'm not knocking anybody dy but you used to travel around with him SHELTON not at all disturbed dis dis- Yes Curbed Yes when I Iwas Iwas f was single Oh Im I'm not making an any y b bones ones about It I was as bad i iI I as he he worse With satisfaction Much u c h Is t t worse Cheever and I S 1 ter- ter well well we a had reps I 1 46 You know what they were cro like liko ill tn w will I CARRUTHERS-I CARRUTHERS I I do h. h a SHELTON E ON solemnly V VS S But that's all over mer with now Im I'm a b betI bet bet- 1 I tor ter man since I married mar- mar tied ried Dorothy She's reformed me mc There was Ras lots to reform t too o. o I was a n. bad nn nn r S 1 that didn't bother hot her she enjoyed ed it She 1 t used to talk to me r Just like a mother I Jerry an and d she sho got s-ot me meto f to cut out cards and tho the p ponies ponies ponies-hc he pauses i j reflectively i 7 l 1 CARRUTHERS after afler a period 1 of 01 cogitation cogitation- ci She's helped you 1 r I 8 SHELTON I enthus I ly Iii Helped me I Il i it I t cant can't begin to tell you r I how V man many ways ways ways- Why CARRUTHERS CARRUTHERS Why are you letting her run rUIl runoff off ort with Cheerer Cheever r SHELTON HELTON nervously You dont don't keep on taking tak uk I A ing the medicine after u I 1 youre you're cured do you yon Which was it Theres There's bad Jerry Im I'm cured you in m in me and there must be t I know And I dont don't some ome good l lift left ft in me But want to be cured more any anymore W what h hat a t am I 11 A good dmore d- d c more than I am Im I'm Ime goo woman A e. good man Im I'm so or a bad woman I tL 4 r good o Jerry Im I'm so dont don't t know r. r it p r- r i r f i- i good sometimes that Im I'm almost afraid of or myself Before I married Dorothy I wasn't good But It was wasso wasso wasso so comfortable J I never nc had llad an auy regrets I was as not afraid to drink because because be be- cause causo even If It I I well well oven en If tr I is did diel take a n drop too much I wouldn't make malie a fool tool of myself Jerry I Iwas Iwas Iwas was consistent then I was dependable I never had bad anything to be ashamed of or Whatever cr I did I well ell I stood back of or It I didn't have to worry And now Im I'm living on tho brink of or ofa ofa ora a volcano Im I'm full ull of ot all kinds of or Impulses to do good things thins things I dont don't want ant to do I never Imo know what's that's going to happen halpen next nett and Jerry I dont don't Ut like e It its j. j Its It's not fair to me Im I'm like lilea a man who has swallowed a stick of ot dynamite dyna dyna- dynamite mite hes he's expecting It to blow up any minute A Aman Aman man should ho bo true to him him- self I r dont don't know whom Im I'm true to but Its It's not Billy Shelton Theres There's no Billy Shelton SheHan left hes he's tenths nine-tenths Dorothy and tenth one remnants CARRUTHERS shifting uneasily un vu Isn't easily easily Isn't it time to S Sto go goto goto to a show SHELTON consulting his hb watch Eight o'clock That Is two minutes after alter Jerry Terry she's gone gona CARRUTHERS Lets Let's Lets Let's get our coats on c r 7 I Y r Iri o t Ak I i I NUU I I r S Si i fir 1 si I l I 4 I ii t 2 i Yi a. a I bE- bE I L h r tl LIKA f c SHELTON SHELTON No Wait Waft a a. minute g at at Good evening evening Do Dorothy othy Dorothy leaves the doorway Y and staggers 3 to a chair char Shelton alarmed hastens to her hen II him curiously What's What's the Get water rL somo a Jerry matter with you CUU f SHELTON SHELTO Would SHELTON Would you ou mind mind mind-if If I stayed ed home to-night to CARRUTHERS What surprised surprised What SH SHELTON SHELTON-I I I mean it IL I dont don't feel teel like going out so s soon after after after- Its It's Its It's not a funeral y you U know M SHELTON SHELTON No But But Dut- CARRUTHERS Hut But what SHELTON SHELTON Dorothy Dorothy wouldn't like it CARRUTHERS facing him resolutely-Answer resolutely resolutely Answer me one question SHELTON SHELTON Well Well CARRUTHERS ls Is Dorothy your wife or was she your wife ife SHELTON I hesitantly hesitantly I guess its it's Is rs You see Bce she's she not more than ten miles awa away from New ew York now CARRUTHERS And And youre you're afraid you may have to account to her SHELTON SHELTON No Its It's not that She's loft left me and Im I'm m my own master But the very ery day that she elopes dont don't you think it would bo ho a a. little he sea searches relics for a word word word-a a little Indecent indecent indecent in In- decent if It I were to start celebrating Im I'm a gentleman Jerry and It wouldn't be quite quito respectful ful to Dorothy She mightn't like Ilke it lL Hc He lights on a happy simile Its It's like reading tho the will while the corpse is still sUll warm Isn't It Come now be honest Jerry The door doo opens and Dorothy a tall slim sUm rather attractive attractive attractive at at- woman in her late twenties stands on the thc threshold thresh thresh- old She is Quite excited an and she site trembles a little The Themen Themen Themen men thunderstruck at her lIer sudden appearance arc unable unable unable un un- un- un able to voice a greeting Shelton collapsed in ha his chair char gasps like a fish out of 01 water fOater and Carruthers petrified at the height of 01 an alJ oratorical gesture is not much bettel better S SHELTON at length Good Good evening Doroth Dorothy Dorothy y l leaver leave the doorway and staggers to a chair Shelton alarmed hastens to her Get some Bomo water Jerr Jerry DOROTHY DOROTHY No No no I want nothing Carruthers carafe in hand stands motionless Shelton I indicates the thc door Carruthers nods flod and goes gocs DOROTHY Is Is ho he gone SHELTON Yes SHELTON Yes Genuinely anxious Is anything any wrong with T 6 juu sou J Dorothy f DOROTHY DOROTHY No No She pauses Billy SHE Yes SHELTON Yes Yes t DOROTHY Ive DOROTHY I Ive I've come back Ive I've como come h home again aln 3 r SHELTON Yes lamely lamely Yes So I notice r j rl DOROTHY You DOROTHY You got my note SH SHELTON Your SHELTON Your note What note DOROTHY I I sent it with a messenger half halt a an hour ago SHELTON SHELTON-I I haven't rent seen seon it DOROTHY DOROTHY No No She pass passes her er hand Ol over her forehead wearily Billy it was a farewell SHELTON with an affectation of 01 surprise What surprise What DOROTHY I I was on the point of ot leaving you leaving you ou of or running ort oft with another man SHELTON SHELTON With With Cheerer Cheever DOROTHY You DOROTHY You suspected Shelton nod nods She goes goC him tb with tl outstretched hands Billy at the tho last minute something something something some some- thing stopped me Something made me come home borne to you For an instant Shelton is silent Then comes the tIle amax amax- amazing amazing ing tug question I SHELTON Why SHELTON Why DOROTHY staggered What SHELTON insistently You You You Were were ere on the tile cint of running away avay You had planned everything e carefully people dont don't do such things on tho spur of or tho the moment What Waat s stopped you jOu DOROTHY gasping at th the shock Dont Don't Don't Dont you rou love lore me SHELTON SHErlTON not answering th the Question question question-Cheever is a rl rich hl man Of or course he hasn't got as much as Ive I've got but ho has plenty to take care caro of or you OU The Tho scandal you must have been prepared for tor If It you loved e Cheever er what made you ou come back to fo me You DOROTHY DOROTHY You You dont don't love lova me mo Billy SHELTON W Would SHELTON Would ul that ha have stopped you DOROTHY Would DOROTHY Would that have have have- She stops thunderstruck at what she sees see within herself I don't dont know Breaking down and weeping I dont don't know Billy There is a pause Then she gathers herself together Billy look at me SHELTON Well SHELTON Well DOROTHY DORoTHY DORoTHY-Am DOROTHY DOROTHY-Am Am I a a. good woman SHELTON Well hesitantly hesitantly Well DOROTHY Tell DOROTHY Tell me the truth Billy SHELTON You SHELTON You ou were a n good s woman when you married me rue DOROTHY excitedly Yes excitedly Yes That's right I was a good woman then But am I a good woman now He Ha hesitates Answer me me tIle Tell me C l 1920 International Feature Service Inc Inc- SHELTON after a pause I pause I dont don't know Dorothy Dorothr desperately desperately-Billy desperately Billy neither do I There is 13 a athus I Il l thus aus No girl was ever brought up as I was We were ere good so 50 good All the people I met were were so good s I dont don't believe o any of ot them ever er had a normal impulse They were saints Billy saints Then you were Introduced to me you me-you you remember SHELTON SHELTON Yes DOROTHY I I thou thought ht you were the worst man I had ever eer met Shelton is a little upset but Dorothy proceeds fluently I had heard the most awful stories about you oh ob the most unbelievable b e things You and Cheever er SHELDON nodding We We We were pals DOROTHY DOROTHY Yes I began to think I kne knew that if it I married married a aman aman aman man as good as ns I was was Id I'd go mad stark staring mad She pauses Dilly Billy have ha you ever felt an impulse to do something something something some some- thing outrageous SHELTON SHELTON-or Of course DOROTHY What DOROTHY What happened SHELTON I I did it it DOROTHY So So did I For the first time in m my life I married you OU l' l SHELTON Thank offended offended Thank you Dorothy U UN No o. o To-morrow To Ill I'll be a free m man no no n-no no wife n no o responsibilities es no conscience Rather clever clever- of me me eh eb Jerry If I had told her I didn't mind she never would have run off Never 4 DOROTHY DOROTHY Oh Oh Ive I've had no regrets It wasn't good for tor me but Ive I've enjoyed it Ive I've enjo enjoyed ed It too much SHELTON What SHELTON What do you mean mean DOROTHY DOROTHY Billy Billy do you know youve you've had a great Influence on me He fie cannot answer Do you imagine a a. woman can live with you for 01 two years cars as ns I have haie lived li with you an and remain a perfectly good woman SHELTON floundering Isn't Isn't Isn't that a little strong DOROTHY The DOROTHY The truth truth truth-is is s always strong Im I'm not blaming you Bm Billy Youre You're exerted an influence it was the only influence you rou could exert SHELTON oa gaspin A D-A D bad one DOROTHY DOROTHY Tire The best Jest that was as in you SHELTON Which Which is to say sar the worst DOROTHY I I I suppose fco so SHELTON SH-ELTO SHELTON And And |