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Show Among other tliingn, tne itntoniobllt baa taken a loud oil the iimnutiu no clety. As yet, the nernphine has not licR'tn if-rloiiHly to worry tho automobile buhlncHH. It Ih better for one's aeroplane to ga wrong- ten us !!? from land hoilzon-tally hoilzon-tally than vertically. A German woman advocates com-pulsory com-pulsory douiesiic k-tvIcp for all girls. She imiKt live In thu Biibiiibs. American lielrexaea when caught very young may be more easily trained by their titled husbands. Fivi generals of the Haitian revolutionary revolu-tionary army have been captured and ehot. I'reMimably the private got away. Maybe the woman who received coal when cbn thought he was buying eggs la In luck that It was not diamonds. dia-monds. Aviator Latham haa gone duck bunting In a monoplane. The Innovation Innova-tion adds to the undcalrablllty of being be-ing a duck. Fresh air advocate will not be aur-prised aur-prised to learn that a hermit who had remained indoor for forty year died of pneumonia. Paris wants a new law to discourage dueling, the Idea being to ahed oratory ora-tory Instead of blood when aome ona haa a grievance. The enterprlalng Journalist will c to It that the llopo diamond keep true to Ha traditions In the matter of worrying It owners. roaslbly the Chicago thieves who were betrayed by the alnglng of a canary have come to the conclusion that a bird on the dump la worth two In the Oat. Funny the lightning picked out the Missouri atatehouae aa Its objective, when big. lall, glittering rods are up In New Jersey, Ohio, Maasuchusetta and New York. One of the aclentlats predict that the women of tho future will bo bald headed. Pahawt Ho Is dreaming. II women were bald beaded, how could they uko hatpins? The Montana bride who bad novel spoken to her prospective husband until un-til a few minute before the marriage ceremony will probably make up for her lack of loquacity. Three thousand glrla are taking a Commercial course In the Itoston high schoools. Perhaps this I one of tin reasons why acboolboys are being taught to sew and daru. In Germany there la a dog that can apeak seven words. No woman Is likely to have much respect for a dog that can't make use of a more exteu-alve exteu-alve vocabulary than that. New York city l about to legislate against hatpins, lit lug strung on one does not Improve the temper of the tired citizen who must ride borne packed In a subway train. American football may be frowned upon by Kuropean educators, but we can point with pride to the fact that our universities have not accepted anarchy aa a popular sport. East Kt. Ixmls wants eggs to be stamped with the date on which they were minted. Cannot Wlxard llurbank or Wizard Edison Invent a hen auffl clently intelligent to use a time clock? The party who referred to the Smithsonian Institution as a "trash heap" evidently labors under the impression im-pression that the specimens slaughtered slaugh-tered by Col. Koosevelt are already there. A New York Judge haa decided that a wife, even though she be childless, Is a man's "family" to tho extent of ahar ing In his money. Even the law these daj of women's rights la deferring to the lady. A peaceful citizen who was held up and robbed by two Chicago crooki wanta to thanK them because they didn't kill him. All of which constl tute our notion of the uttermost limit of optimism. A rich coal operator of West Virginia Vir-ginia wants a divorce because bis wife insisted on putting on txixing gloves with him and whipping him every night. He fore deciding to break up bis happy bottie he chould have tried putting on a catcher' mask and au umpire' pad. Russia Is going to build a ITfi.ofm,-000 ITfi.ofm,-000 fWt for I be llluck m a. Evidently Hussia lui't taking much stock In this universal peace business. A Philadelphia woman want a divorce because her huobaud allowed her only 25 rents a day. Evidently she im't satlsned with bcr quarters. It la cot surprUIng that the r coaina of dinosaur should be found In New York city. Iead one are t-leatUul In the vicinity of Iiroadway |